I thought I would laugh at the past, and I mostly did. The only thing that isn't comical is that I mostly feel the same way. 

There's no one here and for some reason that's a breath of fresh air. Let's go: I puke after every meal. I'm alone, but in a relationship of ten years. I have no idea how to make friends. I have no idea how to keep the ones I have. Everyone keeps dying around me and I don't know why I'm still alive.

I think that about sums it up.

there's an absolution here. Pity it be the frays of my dying memory. I could give more than one reason to give a card to my lesser hand. I won't.
I am done as fucking done is.
The sun comes up:
"...better go fake a smile!"

It's the same ole' six and seven, lately ( Read more... )

My obsession once again takes hold and demands nothing less than absolution. I don't know where this rogue wave comes from, but each time it hits it gets harder to keep my footing.
Yes, I'm talking about that fleeting feeling, that Iceland thing that I've had for years. Now it's different, though. I'm getting older; and with no college education I ( Read more... )

Perhaps if I wrote more... in the way that I used to; I'd probably not be as ill as I feel most days. Too much of my life over the past two years has been filled with liver-eating bottles of alcohol to numb out the realities. Too many cigarettes, and not enough sunlight to promote much more than a waiting-game that is my existence ( Read more... )

"updated 30 weeks ago"

That's my greetings signing onto this web journal I never use. Fitting.

Well, outside of work and sleep (which take up the majority of my existance as of late) I actually have been up to something. Yes, I am still plotting my great escape from this country, but I have other things up my sleeve.

INNSÆI. I decided to stop trying ( Read more... )

With the exception of a few of you (and your artwork), this site is now usless. I have a news feed on here that I don't need, I don't post anything, and all I see is daily complaining about trivial bullshit from people I no longer talk to. Despite the offer, I'm not attracted into getting lured in.

r.i.p journal. not sure why I even had one.

There has rarely gone a day since my birthday that I have not drank. I don't always get drunk, sometimes it's nothing more than the glass of wine with dinner sort of drinking, but I feel well ( Read more... )

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE. CRAWFISH BOIL. MAYBE CHICKEN WINGS. BIRTHDAY FOR THE 21. DO IT. BYOB