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[notquite_pretty]

It's been seven months and I still cry every day. When I see babies in the mall or on TV, I just want to hold them. I dream about babies every night and no matter what I do I can't forgive myself.

Someone please tell me when this will get easier...

Comments

[ahealthyme]

I don't know your situation...but I never felt those things after mine...

This sounds like some kind of a depression..have you considered getting help?

[notquite_pretty]

yeah, im sure it is..but i can't bring myself to tell anyone

[eyelid]

if you call 1-800-4exhale you can be anonymous... maybe then you could bring yourself to talk about it?

[eyelid]

It sounds like you're having an uncommonly bad reaction and it's not getting better for you. Is there anyone around you can talk to, or maybe you have access to professional help? You can also try calling 1-800-4exhale. That's a national hotline for women who have had abortions; they're unbiased and just want to help. They have sympathetic counsellors who will lend you a compassionate ear

[notquite_pretty]

thanks so much.
i've gotten myself some antidepressants but they just make me feel weird and im not sure if they're solving anything. I imagine if i told my doctor why i'm depressed, she could help better, but i noticed that she's catholic and no good can come from that...
do you think it's too late to grieve? I feel guilty when I bring it up with my boyfriend because it's been so long and I hate to make him hurt all over again... I'm just not sure.
I tried that number you gave me the other night. Apparently in Canada it doesn't exist, so it kinda sucks. It took me almost two weeks to get myself to call it too.

anyways, thanks for listening. I'm shocked at how supportive everyone is here. It's nice. I don't feel like such a horrible person after talking to everyone..

[eyelid]

thanks so much. i've gotten myself some antidepressants but they just make me feel weird and im not sure if they're solving anything.
They don't really "solve" things as much as give you some emotional relief while you work things out/heal. Think of them like an emotional tylenol :) Unless of course you really have long-term depression issues apart from the abortion; then they're more like a medication you need to be healthy.

I imagine if i told my doctor why i'm depressed, she could help better, but i noticed that she's catholic and no good can come from that...
Not all Catholics are anti-choice... but it is a risk and I totally understand if you don't want to take the chance of being yelled at.

do you think it's too late to grieve? Not at all! In fact some people really can't deal with the grieving process till long after the traumatic event. Maybe for you you're just now getting to the point where you're ready to process things. Either way, there's no time limit on the grieving process. If it will help you to do a formal

[vaginajones]

i felt the same way... and yes, it does. i admitt it took me a while, but i did get past it. and now i work at a day care part time working with infants, and i'm 100% fine!!

just remember, it will get easier.

[notquite_pretty]

was wokring with babies what made things better for you? because i'm in nursing and I've been thinking about going into the NICU just so that i could be around them and take care of them, but i'm really not sure if that would just make things worse...

[cat666]

I felt the same way. Things will get easer, it just takes time.

[eyelid]

hey Cat - we really appreciate your input and support. But your icon could be triggering for a woman who is upset about her abortion. If you could use a different one when commenting here in the future, that would be awesome! :) Thanks.

[cat666]

I'm so sorry! I didn't have that Icon when I made the comment.
Again I'm so, so sorry.

[eyelid]

It's no problem. These things happen.