"...because because
i'm sick of all the bones you throw
because because
there's nothing from the seeds you sow
because because
i can't remember why I'm here
because because
it's all become so crystal clear

and when i'm tired, i am so very tired
and when it's done, it's like i've killed someone..."

well, at least I'm doing something on my bullshit resolution list...

writing in a journal is completely different than actually writing.  journal's are easy for me to keep up because i typically write just as i would if i were speaking to a friend.  nothing complicated about that.  but writing is a whole other ball game.  it's something i used to ( Read more... )

so far i have not kept up with a single new years resolution. sooo that's pretty lame ( Read more... )

somedays aren't yours at all. they come and go as if they're someone elses days, they come and leave you behind someone elses face. and it's harsher than yours, and colder than yours. they come in all quiet, sweep up, and then they leave. and you don't hear a single floorboard creek. they're so much stronger than the friends you try to keep by ( Read more... )

in 2010 i'm gonnaaaa ( Read more... )

typey typin in my little office/guest room, watching my boyfriend watch tv on our brand new flatscreen from our brand new couch. surrounded by grandma lu's belongings and great grandma ruth's paintings. it still smells and looks like christmas in here. i love everything ( Read more... )

soooomeetimes i can't write at all

it really kind of hit me last night that i am a working professional. that sounds really lame to say, i know, but it was an odd realization. i'm a director at one job and a manager at another. i have work emails and work keys and work phones and i do conference calls and webinars. by no means am i the most professional i can be at each job - i' ( Read more... )

my parents bought a house on the colorado river, about 3 lots down from the area we've camped in since before i was born. it's lovely and private and perfect. we spent thanksgiving weekend there. evenings were spent around the bonfire pit with my dad and brother playing guitar, nader on harmonica, me singing, and my mom and sister-in-law looking ( Read more... )

finally got a next door neighbor in my fourplex. and she's fucking RAD. she's a middle age 1st grade teacher with a super quiet (but cute) 19-year-old son. she's incredibly friendly, but the best part is that she's a blunt, in-your-face, cusses like a sailor, all around hilarious kinda lady. and she's giving nader and access to her wireless ( Read more... )