Ski-jumping and luge are two of those sports where I really don't understand how they came to be. What was the thought process here?

"Let's throw ourselves off a hill and see how far we can go."

"Let's get a toboggan, lie down on it and see how fast we can go."

Okay, put like that, luge makes a little more sense. Still doesn't explain ski-

The entrance of the Olympic flag, carried by Mama Fox, Donald Sutherland (looking sharp), Jacque Villenueve, Barbara Ann Scott, Anne Murray, Romeo Dalliere (yay!), Bobby Orr, and Julie Piette. The Olympic hymn is being sung by an opera singer, and she is rocking it. It is one of the great disappointments of my life that I cannot sing like that ( Read more... )

Speeches are made. French is butchered. Michaele Jean opens the games (and does not butcher the French). K.D. Lang sings. The audience has electric candles. K.D. really does have a spectacular voice. K.D. does not need your crappy AutoTune. Next, the lighting of the cauldron. FINALLY.

This next performance is about a young girl and her experience growing up on the Praries. Blargh ( Read more... )

Well damn, apparently the announcer is Brian Williams. Why are you on CTV? At least they got you to dial down the depression ( Read more... )

Shoot, which country is this that is dressed like a herd of Father Christmas'? Nice green coats on Slovenia. Where can I get one? South Africa, Spain, Sweden. The Swedes are very yellow. I like their flag mittens. The announcers are aquiver with anticipation for Canada. The politics of Taiwan are exhausting, even for 30 seconds. Another ( Read more... )

I'm not going to lie, the Parade of Nations is always my favourite part, because everyone is just so gosh-darned happy (well, except for Georgia). It's hard to not feel vicarious cheer. Mongolia is also in a bitchin' native costume. Oh damn, the dork dancing is back. The flag bearer is a Sherpa who has climbed Everest. Excellent. And now, ( Read more... )

India. They didn't have matching uniforms when they arrived, so the Indo-Canadian community pitched in and bought them new ones. Nice. Iran! The first female athlete is competing this year, in skiing. You go, girl! For some reason, I find the idea of Israeli hockey players hilarious. The Italian team looks like the staff of a prep school. ( Read more... )

The Bermudans are wearing shorts! It's a team of Christopher Robins. And here's the Cayman Islands, in they're first winter games. They have jaunty straw boaters on. Apparently this is Columbia's first winter games as well. Huh, I didn't know Jagomir Jagr was Czech. And here comes the North Koreans. I guess the whole marching together thing ( Read more... )

Parade of Nations! I always like the Parade of Nations. Here's Greece. The sign holders are wearing mini-skirt parkas. Correction, the female sign holders are wearing mini-skirt parkas. I like Andorra's sweaters. The good thing about the Olympics being on CTV is that we are not subjected to Brian Williams' Giant Almanac of Depressing World ( Read more... )