Fic: Proposition
Title: Proposition
Fandom: SGA
Characters/Pairings: Sheppard/Teyla
Word Count: 1,991
Rating: PG-13 (one itty bitty swear word)
Summary: With the return of the Athosians comes a deeper grief for one of Sheppard's team, and after lots (and lots!) of reflection, he decides to do something about it.
Author's Notes: Jag wrote me a John-proposes-to-Inara fic and demanded I do the same. Or Teyla. She said it could be Teyla. Bastard Lt.-Colonel got me out of bed this morning just to write down one damned line (THE line), and then 3 hours later we have the fic to go with it. May or may not be viable to cross off #21 of our Big Damn SGA List.
Warning: Spoilers for SGA 04x04 (Doppelganger) through SGA 04x07 (Missing), along with the assumption of when the particular story-arc that began in "Missing" actually ends. Because I can. And I did. :p
Takes place sometime after 04x11 (Be All My Sins Remember'd)
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There were very few things in life that could erase jealousy. Time was the main one, but John knew that not nearly enough of it had passed to have that sort of effect on him. Seeing the one you cared about happy with the one that caused the jealousy was the other, but some odd twist of fate had ensured that the Lieutenant-Colonel would never get the chance to see that sight, that he'd never meet the man who had captured his teammate's heart. He supposed it was ironic, in a way, but mostly he supposed it was just business as usual in Pegasus. It was as if even this small scrap of joy was too much for it to handle at the moment, and the added exuberance at finding the Athosians safe and whole was the limit and anything else would be exceeding the Lanteans' expectations for life. Because yes, the Athosians had been found, and safely, too. But the word "whole" was a mockery to at least one Athosian, and she had spent many days curled around a pillow, lost in extraordinary grief.
John could never erase the image of Teyla's smile faltering and then failing as Halling had approached her, the only words from the exchange etched in his memory being "Teyla, I'm so very sorry" and "Kanaan was among them." He could still feel the warmth of her tears on his uniform as she had clutched the nearest body to keep from collapsing on the spot. Of course, John had been the one at her side the instant he saw her falter, and for once he had wrapped his arms around her without awkwardness. He had noted, idly, that whenever something occurred and Teyla needed someone to latch on to, she had always gone to him. When Heightmeyer had died, she had come to him, regardless of the fact that it was indirectly his fault that the psychologist was dead. When her people had gone missing, she had saved her most impassioned missives for him, as if he alone held the power to carry her to them so they could be rescued.
It was like he had become her hero, and ever since the day they had met - nearly four and a half years ago, now - she had worn an invisible "John Sheppard Fan Club" button on her shirt. Even when he was being the biggest ass in the universe, she would always smile at him in that fondly exasperated way after telling him very politely to fuck off and mind his own business. It was always a no harm, no foul deal with her, and he supposed that was one of the things he loved about her. They fought like the scrappiest pups in the litter, which amused everyone - especially Ronon - to no end, but it all boiled down to mutual respect and affection.
He felt like an ass now, for being jealous when she had finally told him of the pregnancy and that she had been seeing someone. Of course she had never told him about the relationship. Who the hell was he, that he had every right to her private life? Hell, he should be one to talk, when one considered the innumerable skeletons in his own closet. He knew something about intensely private information and now...now he could hardly fault her for keeping the relationship a secret. In light of the fact that he had just found out how new the whole thing had been for her and Kanaan, he would have expected nothing less. Hell, it had taken him six months to tell his own brother about the girlfriend who would eventually become his wife all those years ago.
Of course, in true John Sheppard fashion, it had taken him the two months since the Athosian's return to figure all this out, which now left him propped up in bed during an all-too-infrequent down-time, clothing crumpled from sitting so long, and Johnny Cash singing through round number three of the playlist on his laptop. He had seen a lot of Teyla during the waking hours of the last several weeks, holding her hand through her visits with Jennifer in the infirmary, making her smile as he made a big deal of feeling the first kicks from her belly. Ronon took over when John was needed elsewhere, and together they mitigated Rodney's crass personality, dragging him out of the room when either sensed he might say something unfortunate. Both John and Ronon pretended it was for Rodney's safety and that, pregnant or not, Teyla would kick his ass if the astrophysicist stepped out of line, but really they knew it was to protect Teyla and her fragile feelings. Hormones wreaked havoc with most women, but when added to the grief of losing the father of the child...yep, that right there would ensure that no Wraith would be left living once Teyla had that baby, and John planned to be beside her the whole time.
Tthat realization had him blinking. A comment made by Ronon nearly a year previous began bouncing around his head. (...It was funny how they never got a chance to finish that conversation.) He took a moment to really think about it now. How the hell would he even go about asking her such a thing? He figured the Athosians had some sort of cultural way of popping the question, but really that wasn't the point. Would he really be doing him or Teyla any favours with this? The last time he had tried, it didn't work too well, and could he really do that to Teyla? Or perhaps the problem with his previous marriage wasn't that he wasn't good at it? Maybe there was something else that he didn't quite pick up on? Either way, was his mind tripping down this line of thinking because he felt he somehow maybe owed it to Teyla? Or was this some whacked-out sense of duty to her and her unborn child that the military part of his mind was projecting?
Maybe it's just the fact that you have yet to really admit to yourself that you love her, you idiot, and that in spite of everything that's happened, you still want to take care of her and don't care that the kid's not yours. Okay, now he was really sitting up and blinking. Kid's gotta have a father, right? So it doesn't grow up with some sort of psychological complex? ...Then again, she has a village of male role-models that are possibly a lot more qualified than I am.
How his thoughts were getting so out of hand, he didn't know. That he was even contemplating...
He scrambled off the bed and headed to Teyla's room. One part of him hoped she was napping and wouldn't answer, another part hoped she wasn't napping because he didn't want to wake her if she was, and still another hoped she'd answer. He could question the sanity of this idea later, once Teyla had laughed at him and he had sufficient time to feel like an idiot. They'd move past this with grace and aplomb like they did that kiss way back when and nothing would change between them. (Except, then, everything would change between them, but he wouldn't let himself think of that just yet, either.)
He wrung his hands gently as he waited for an answer to the door chime, and he began to seriously question his state of mind as the seconds dragged on. Just as he was coming to the conclusion that yes, Teyla was napping and no, she wasn't getting up to answer, he turned on his heel to run back to the safety of other people. He got two steps away from her door, two steps towards the freedom of the mess hall, when the door slid open with a gentle hiss of hydraulics. The curious sounding "John?" had him stopping and turning back to take in the puffy eyes and the red and watery gaze of his dearest and best friend.
"Teyla, I...are you okay?" he asked, closing the distance between them and reaching out to her. Relief coursed through him when she didn't pull away.
"I'm fine," she lied, leaning into his touch. He smiled ruefully, letting her have that one tiny lie. Of course she wasn't fine. How could she be when she was reminded every day of the man she had loved by the gentle swell of her belly?
"Is this a bad time?" She shook her head and invited him inside silently. Of course, now that he was here, he had no idea what he was doing. Moron, you had no idea what you were doing before you got here. "Listen, I was thinking, and...and I don't think it's really fair that you have to go through all this alone."
She gave him the look she always gave him when she thought he was being nutty. "But I am not alone, John. I have my people, and I have you and Rodney and Ronon..."
He waved a dismissive hand, cutting her off. "That's not what I mean. What I mean is...hell, I don't know what I mean, but the thing is you and Kanaan would have eventually been married, and now you won't and that's just...not fair."
She smiled ruefully. "It is life. And life goes on. I cannot change what happened, though I wish with all my being that I could..."
"Neither can I, as much as I'd like to," he said as she trailed off. "Listen, what I'm trying to say is, I don't know how the Athosians do this sort of thing, but on Earth we have a custom that involves knees and rings and, well...I suppose what I'm ultimately getting at is that I'd be honoured if you would, um...you know..." it was his turn to trail off, and again with a weak wave of his hand, denoting that she should be able to inference the rest of the sentence from the conversation as a whole.
It took her several seconds to ponder his words when the meaning of them became clear. Her expression turned bemused and a little awestruck. "You would do such a thing? For me?" She took a step towards him.
He scrubbed a hand through his hair, noting with slight horror that he was a little shaky. "I...yeah. Yeah, I would." He shrugged as casually as he could, stuffing his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels as his head dipped shyly. "I mean, I care about you. And not just because I have to, being a part of my team, and all. I just think it would be nice to know that you'll have someone to take care of you."
Her smile widened. It had to be the most off-handed and round-about proposal that she had ever heard. And somehow, coming from John Sheppard, she expected no less. She snorted softly in amusement, and he looked up at her with his hopeful-sixteen-year-old expression.
She closed the distance and slid her arms around his waist and hugged him tight, resting her cheek against his chest and soaking in the warmth of his body as his arms wrapped around her, awkward as ever. They would have to work on that, she thought with a grin. She tilted her head up to look at him, catching his eye. With a happy sigh, she settled back into the embrace.
"I would have no other father for my child," she said finally, giving him a gentle squeeze. "I accept your proposal."
She managed to contain her giggle as she felt his shoulders slump a little in relief and his hold on her became a little less awkward. He dropped a kiss on the crown of her head before sighing.
Yeah, that hadn't gone too badly. Now they just had to tell everyone else...
Fandom: SGA
Characters/Pairings: Sheppard/Teyla
Word Count: 1,991
Rating: PG-13 (one itty bitty swear word)
Summary: With the return of the Athosians comes a deeper grief for one of Sheppard's team, and after lots (and lots!) of reflection, he decides to do something about it.
Author's Notes: Jag wrote me a John-proposes-to-Inara fic and demanded I do the same. Or Teyla. She said it could be Teyla. Bastard Lt.-Colonel got me out of bed this morning just to write down one damned line (THE line), and then 3 hours later we have the fic to go with it. May or may not be viable to cross off #21 of our Big Damn SGA List.
Warning: Spoilers for SGA 04x04 (Doppelganger) through SGA 04x07 (Missing), along with the assumption of when the particular story-arc that began in "Missing" actually ends. Because I can. And I did. :p
Takes place sometime after 04x11 (Be All My Sins Remember'd)
----------
There were very few things in life that could erase jealousy. Time was the main one, but John knew that not nearly enough of it had passed to have that sort of effect on him. Seeing the one you cared about happy with the one that caused the jealousy was the other, but some odd twist of fate had ensured that the Lieutenant-Colonel would never get the chance to see that sight, that he'd never meet the man who had captured his teammate's heart. He supposed it was ironic, in a way, but mostly he supposed it was just business as usual in Pegasus. It was as if even this small scrap of joy was too much for it to handle at the moment, and the added exuberance at finding the Athosians safe and whole was the limit and anything else would be exceeding the Lanteans' expectations for life. Because yes, the Athosians had been found, and safely, too. But the word "whole" was a mockery to at least one Athosian, and she had spent many days curled around a pillow, lost in extraordinary grief.
John could never erase the image of Teyla's smile faltering and then failing as Halling had approached her, the only words from the exchange etched in his memory being "Teyla, I'm so very sorry" and "Kanaan was among them." He could still feel the warmth of her tears on his uniform as she had clutched the nearest body to keep from collapsing on the spot. Of course, John had been the one at her side the instant he saw her falter, and for once he had wrapped his arms around her without awkwardness. He had noted, idly, that whenever something occurred and Teyla needed someone to latch on to, she had always gone to him. When Heightmeyer had died, she had come to him, regardless of the fact that it was indirectly his fault that the psychologist was dead. When her people had gone missing, she had saved her most impassioned missives for him, as if he alone held the power to carry her to them so they could be rescued.
It was like he had become her hero, and ever since the day they had met - nearly four and a half years ago, now - she had worn an invisible "John Sheppard Fan Club" button on her shirt. Even when he was being the biggest ass in the universe, she would always smile at him in that fondly exasperated way after telling him very politely to fuck off and mind his own business. It was always a no harm, no foul deal with her, and he supposed that was one of the things he loved about her. They fought like the scrappiest pups in the litter, which amused everyone - especially Ronon - to no end, but it all boiled down to mutual respect and affection.
He felt like an ass now, for being jealous when she had finally told him of the pregnancy and that she had been seeing someone. Of course she had never told him about the relationship. Who the hell was he, that he had every right to her private life? Hell, he should be one to talk, when one considered the innumerable skeletons in his own closet. He knew something about intensely private information and now...now he could hardly fault her for keeping the relationship a secret. In light of the fact that he had just found out how new the whole thing had been for her and Kanaan, he would have expected nothing less. Hell, it had taken him six months to tell his own brother about the girlfriend who would eventually become his wife all those years ago.
Of course, in true John Sheppard fashion, it had taken him the two months since the Athosian's return to figure all this out, which now left him propped up in bed during an all-too-infrequent down-time, clothing crumpled from sitting so long, and Johnny Cash singing through round number three of the playlist on his laptop. He had seen a lot of Teyla during the waking hours of the last several weeks, holding her hand through her visits with Jennifer in the infirmary, making her smile as he made a big deal of feeling the first kicks from her belly. Ronon took over when John was needed elsewhere, and together they mitigated Rodney's crass personality, dragging him out of the room when either sensed he might say something unfortunate. Both John and Ronon pretended it was for Rodney's safety and that, pregnant or not, Teyla would kick his ass if the astrophysicist stepped out of line, but really they knew it was to protect Teyla and her fragile feelings. Hormones wreaked havoc with most women, but when added to the grief of losing the father of the child...yep, that right there would ensure that no Wraith would be left living once Teyla had that baby, and John planned to be beside her the whole time.
Tthat realization had him blinking. A comment made by Ronon nearly a year previous began bouncing around his head. (...It was funny how they never got a chance to finish that conversation.) He took a moment to really think about it now. How the hell would he even go about asking her such a thing? He figured the Athosians had some sort of cultural way of popping the question, but really that wasn't the point. Would he really be doing him or Teyla any favours with this? The last time he had tried, it didn't work too well, and could he really do that to Teyla? Or perhaps the problem with his previous marriage wasn't that he wasn't good at it? Maybe there was something else that he didn't quite pick up on? Either way, was his mind tripping down this line of thinking because he felt he somehow maybe owed it to Teyla? Or was this some whacked-out sense of duty to her and her unborn child that the military part of his mind was projecting?
Maybe it's just the fact that you have yet to really admit to yourself that you love her, you idiot, and that in spite of everything that's happened, you still want to take care of her and don't care that the kid's not yours. Okay, now he was really sitting up and blinking. Kid's gotta have a father, right? So it doesn't grow up with some sort of psychological complex? ...Then again, she has a village of male role-models that are possibly a lot more qualified than I am.
How his thoughts were getting so out of hand, he didn't know. That he was even contemplating...
He scrambled off the bed and headed to Teyla's room. One part of him hoped she was napping and wouldn't answer, another part hoped she wasn't napping because he didn't want to wake her if she was, and still another hoped she'd answer. He could question the sanity of this idea later, once Teyla had laughed at him and he had sufficient time to feel like an idiot. They'd move past this with grace and aplomb like they did that kiss way back when and nothing would change between them. (Except, then, everything would change between them, but he wouldn't let himself think of that just yet, either.)
He wrung his hands gently as he waited for an answer to the door chime, and he began to seriously question his state of mind as the seconds dragged on. Just as he was coming to the conclusion that yes, Teyla was napping and no, she wasn't getting up to answer, he turned on his heel to run back to the safety of other people. He got two steps away from her door, two steps towards the freedom of the mess hall, when the door slid open with a gentle hiss of hydraulics. The curious sounding "John?" had him stopping and turning back to take in the puffy eyes and the red and watery gaze of his dearest and best friend.
"Teyla, I...are you okay?" he asked, closing the distance between them and reaching out to her. Relief coursed through him when she didn't pull away.
"I'm fine," she lied, leaning into his touch. He smiled ruefully, letting her have that one tiny lie. Of course she wasn't fine. How could she be when she was reminded every day of the man she had loved by the gentle swell of her belly?
"Is this a bad time?" She shook her head and invited him inside silently. Of course, now that he was here, he had no idea what he was doing. Moron, you had no idea what you were doing before you got here. "Listen, I was thinking, and...and I don't think it's really fair that you have to go through all this alone."
She gave him the look she always gave him when she thought he was being nutty. "But I am not alone, John. I have my people, and I have you and Rodney and Ronon..."
He waved a dismissive hand, cutting her off. "That's not what I mean. What I mean is...hell, I don't know what I mean, but the thing is you and Kanaan would have eventually been married, and now you won't and that's just...not fair."
She smiled ruefully. "It is life. And life goes on. I cannot change what happened, though I wish with all my being that I could..."
"Neither can I, as much as I'd like to," he said as she trailed off. "Listen, what I'm trying to say is, I don't know how the Athosians do this sort of thing, but on Earth we have a custom that involves knees and rings and, well...I suppose what I'm ultimately getting at is that I'd be honoured if you would, um...you know..." it was his turn to trail off, and again with a weak wave of his hand, denoting that she should be able to inference the rest of the sentence from the conversation as a whole.
It took her several seconds to ponder his words when the meaning of them became clear. Her expression turned bemused and a little awestruck. "You would do such a thing? For me?" She took a step towards him.
He scrubbed a hand through his hair, noting with slight horror that he was a little shaky. "I...yeah. Yeah, I would." He shrugged as casually as he could, stuffing his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels as his head dipped shyly. "I mean, I care about you. And not just because I have to, being a part of my team, and all. I just think it would be nice to know that you'll have someone to take care of you."
Her smile widened. It had to be the most off-handed and round-about proposal that she had ever heard. And somehow, coming from John Sheppard, she expected no less. She snorted softly in amusement, and he looked up at her with his hopeful-sixteen-year-old expression.
She closed the distance and slid her arms around his waist and hugged him tight, resting her cheek against his chest and soaking in the warmth of his body as his arms wrapped around her, awkward as ever. They would have to work on that, she thought with a grin. She tilted her head up to look at him, catching his eye. With a happy sigh, she settled back into the embrace.
"I would have no other father for my child," she said finally, giving him a gentle squeeze. "I accept your proposal."
She managed to contain her giggle as she felt his shoulders slump a little in relief and his hold on her became a little less awkward. He dropped a kiss on the crown of her head before sighing.
Yeah, that hadn't gone too badly. Now they just had to tell everyone else...