i think of her always.  you know, like...what would she say if she were here right now? or...this would be so much better if she were here right now.  or something like that.  i don't want to think like that...i'm sure it's unhealthy.

we've talked.  i told her what i needed to tell her before i came home.  she said she understands and she went ( Read more... )

there is so much i want to say to her.  i just want the chance to tell her that i'm sorry for everything.  and that it's not all her fault.  i don't want her to blame herself.  i fucked up.  i blamed her for everything.  all of my problems, i turned them around and made them hers.  she said i was clingy, i said it was because of something she did. ( Read more... )

october eighteenth: the smell makes me happy. it reminds me of the day i went to hawaii. that morning at 12:30. when i ran and gave him a hug and he hugged me. it's a smell of good times and summer. the good parts of summer. it makes me feel like i have someone waiting for me when i get back from wherever. it's a satisfying smell that makes me

it's not easy giving up a lover. to a nobody. but if they were a nobody, then why would the lover pick them over you? you are somebody. it's not easy giving up a lover to nobody. especially if it really is to no body.

what happened?

i've forgotten to feed my fish. but i did just now...so its all good. but still. i feel bad. :(

um...star testing! means AP review sessions! boo! i went to the econ one this morning and for the first hour it was...ok...but then the second hour, i totally could not concentrate. gov tomorrow. great. i dont know why i'm going..i'm not going to pass the ( Read more... )

hello ( Read more... )

colleges!  please tell me where you are going. i want to know ( Read more... )

haha. im in a good mood right now ( Read more... )

my chest hurts. below my ribs. my lungs. it feels tight and its hard to breathe ( Read more... )