Brigits Flame Entry - July 2012 - Week 1 - "Fly"

[aine_marihugh]

New Guinea Impatiens on my 34th Birthday

I think I'm now ready.
I'm thirty-four years-old today.
I've traveled the country
for work and play.
I've been followed by whales
in Monterrey. Jumped out of a plane
in San Jose. I've busted my rump
and earned an MA. I think
I'm now ready.

I think that I'm ready.
Ready for the swollen
belly. Ready to raise a
loving

Comments

[betweenthelynes]

I like the song quality of this, but even more I like the images it evokes.

I also, sometimes, think I'm ready.
I've embraced my ways, and all the things that come in between.

Great take on the prompt! :)

[innana88]

Thank you so much for reading and commenting! I'm glad you think so. I worried that the prompt connection wouldn't be clear.

[syddnboo]

I love the repetitious quality of this poem. It's beautiful and haunting.

And if it is mildly personal let me assure you that one can never be completely ready to have a child- and babies are much harder to neglect than plants. I definitely wasn't ready, but I don't regret it in the least. You learn on the fly.

[innana88]

Ha! I don't know that I'm actually worried about inadvertently neglecting them. From what I understand, they seem to be pretty good at reminding you to care for them in a rather noisy fashion. :)

Thank you so much for reading and for your comments!

[syddnboo]

Haha yes, noisy indeed. Although my Boo has always been a pretty good little baby, but she complains when she really needs something. With the exception of dirty diapers, which she ignores to play more.

[bluegerl]

Oh my, I THINK I am ready...oh dear me...THINK..but not sure enough to fly, to jump, to DO! And the Impatiens...called 'Bizzy Lizzy' by us Pommy Brits. Oh my... this is good. Gosh, thanks.
Blue.

May I say I love your journal style... what beauteous journals I am finding!!!

[innana88]

Bizzy Lizzy? I love it!

Thank you so much, Blue! For your compliments to the piece and to my journal!

[innana88]

Glad I could induce a chuckle! :) Thank you for stopping by and reading and commenting!

dodos rolling out the edit wagon,he pauses

[bardiphouka]

Greetings and Salutations,etc. Looks over the piece again..hmm.

First of all, I love the internal rhymes. It gives the feeling that the protaganist wants to break out in song..but can't quite. And the anonymous bit of the gift giver. One could read too much into it..and I enjoy doing so..cough ahem.

And there is the bittersweet part that it is not HER dream but her husband's.

Would I change anything? Why not, I have been picky with everyone else this week. I would take the now out of the two I am now ready lines. It is...hmm..too prosaic? In a poem which flows and has rhymes, etc, it just seems to be a bit of a glare. Just a thought. Ever so interesting a poem.

Re: dodos rolling out the edit wagon,he pauses

[innana88]

Thank you for the edit, Bardi!

It's always funny to read other's takes on various lines, etc... I honestly didn't give a single thought to the anonymity of the gift giver. 'Someone' simply sounded less cumbersome than the clunky 'mother-in-law', but whoa! Yeah, I never even thought of that angle! Ha! Glad you enjoyed reading into it. Alas, it was a gift from my mother-in-law. Nothing sinister here! Color me amused!

And I think I agree with you about the nows. You're right; it makes more sense that the poem flow more easily in that first stanza.

Thank you once again for your edit and for a good chuckle!