well i guess i should update this bitch. i got kicked out of the dormsa for drinking and now i live in a house. well all of my housemates are gorgeous and runners, so thin. i hate it. i still so desperatl;ey wanna sleep forever. just lay down in the snow and drift away forever. goddess please just kill me now, even jaime is mad at me, jessie doesnt ( Read more... )

Wow today was crazy. I miss like all my classes because I was sleeping, then Spanish was cancelled, then I had my astronomy midterm, but I completely failed because I haven’t bee there since the lst test. Lol so I totally failed. I at pizza today so I gained like 10 lbs. I will have to starve for at least 3 days for that mistake. Ana is very angry ( Read more... )

i dont wan to e here anymore, i HATE it here, no one gives a flying shit either, dont try to say you do. im not stupid i k now you all talk behind my back and shit. i just dont want to be here sometimes, like on earth, i get so upset and i just want to get drunk or high and i cant. i might be getting kicked out anywayz because i came home saturday ( Read more... )

well i think i might be moving soon, i am kinda hoping but i am scared at the same time. i want to be with james so bad but its alot farther than i had imagined. i will miss my kids alot. i dont know what i will do, no matter what i have to finish this semester anyway so i probably wont make a decision until then so..., anywayz i talked to my good ( Read more... )

i burned a total of 750 cals at the gym, that doesnt include all the walking i did today, working, and the running im about to do, i did an ok job with eating today to, slimfast 180, sobe adrenaline rush 120, and BAD two cookies at least 600, so ..... i will do better tommorow i swear

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god why do i eat, i am so unworthy of food, and of love. how can people even look at me without vomiting? how can they speak to me knowing and seeing i have no willpower. Please ana come be with me now. Please if i ever get over 180 from now, kill me, james if you love me you will do it......

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wow i am tired, i got my nike shox so i have no excuse not to work out, which i need to be doing very soon, i got so many new clothes adn another pair of shoes to yea!

its 3:29 a.m. i didnt get homw from work till 12:15 and i knew if i went to sleep i would not be able to get up in the morning so here i am totally exhaughted or however it is spelled, god it feels like my brain is liquid