Hell here.

[alizarin_nyc]

I missed Yuletide signups. I know, I know, it's stupid.

Comments

Xeno Warrior Princess

[executrix]

Errr.it's a very small pebble in what needs to be a very big wall (or ceiling) rebuilt, but lots of people actually PREFER to do Yuletide by following the letters database and writing treats instead of signing up. So Yuletide is still a real possibility!

I'm so sorry, basically the bottom line is that people SUCK. Does OK Cupid have any listings for aliens?

Re: Xeno Warrior Princess

[alizarin_nyc]

Yes! OKC has loads of aliens. At least that's what I gather from their photos.

I will have to learn how to do the treats thing. And do that. Which is in many ways, easier on me. Yay?

Re: Xeno Warrior Princess

[executrix]

Yes, yay! All you have to do is check out the prompts, pick one or more that look good, and then post it to the YT DB--main DB if it's over 1000 words, the other one whose name I can't remember offhand if it's under. And nobody except you knows you're even writing it, so if you're not nuts about the story or you can't finish is, you don't have to feel bad because the person you were assigned to is going to have to go to pinch-hit.

There's a protocol thing that some people like to post their treats right at the end of the time period, because if the person they wrote the fic for gets defaulted on by their assigned writer, they might just get your treat and not a full-scale pinch hit, whereas if you post the treat late, they'll get the pinch hit AND your treat. But not such a big deal, because of course everybody in the immediate world gets to read all the Yuletide fics.

[blythechild]

The Brit sounds very confused and, while being indecisive may or may not be a relationship ender for you (it would be for me), he can't really expect you to be okay with this level of flip-flopping. It's not cool to tell someone that you love them but that you don't want to date them anymore (but you'd consider sleeping with them still). If he really wants a break, he should be unambiguous about it, and you have to be prepared to give that to him - no random one-nighters, texts, flirty Facebook messages etc. Let him understand your complete absence.

And please stop picking apart your behavior to find out what you did wrong. Why aren't you asking yourself what he did wrong? Some times things just end - that doesn't make you a failure.

And you should totally do the Yuletide Treat thing this year. I've got a friend who loves doing that each year - it's the highlight of the event for her.

[alizarin_nyc]

Yeah, it's not cool. Not cool at all. I'm giving him the complete absence, because I don't know what else to do. I don't feel there were many other options, although he seems to think that he didn't intend it this way. I don't think he thought it through as well as he thought he did.

I guess I'm not hung up on what I did wrong, but how I didn't see it coming. And how doing everything right is meaningless in this context. I also have issues with shame, regret, abandonment, rejection. So I'm working all that out. OUCH.

[executrix]

Here's info on pinch hits--my first YT experience was doing a pinch hit (it was fun!) but since then I find it too much of a pain in the ass because unless you live on the Yahoo group the pinch hits get grabbed in seconds.

http://yuletide-admin.livejournal.com/179619.html

[mirabile_dictu]

Oh my god, this is SO not your fault. Please please don't blame yourself! It's entirely on him. My god, you must know that at some level. It was his decision and it hurt you, but you didn't do anything to bring it about. His decision, his loss, his assholery. Seriously? He still wants you as a lover but nothing else? What kind of person thinks that way? ARGH. I really want to hug you and be with you while I bake you something yummy and comforting.

[alizarin_nyc]

Yes, I told him he was coming across as an asshole, whether or not that was his intention. I can't tell if he was planning on doing this this weekend or not, but to wait until the last minute, after I'd really reconnected with him was about the worst thing he could have done. I'm sad sad sad. :/

[eretria]

Oh, no, sweetie. :o(

I have nothing helpful to say, but I'm sending all the hugs.

[alizarin_nyc]

hugs are welcome.. i'm just in a place where i don't know what to do next but i must do something to try to forget this is happening.

[eretria]

Any way I can help by way of distraction?