-
Ever question your reality?
There come times when I stop and reload.
There come times when I get back to the question ( Read more... ) -
The lingering feeling of awkward dumbness
Throughout my life I have been this clumsy awkward person. I knew I could be better, I knew I could get fit and stable, for a change, and, yes, strong enough not to be in pain. But the thing is - I just can't get myself into it ( Read more... ) -
The new beginning
Yesterday's ultrasound showed little 6-week old one with 122 heartbeats per minute. I think I should be happy. Doctor said everything is Ok, except, of course, some kind of fluid that is probably blood shown on ultrasound... Why there has to be something wrong??? I mean, I'm calm, as much as I can, this pregnancy seems better than the previous one ( Read more... ) -
Nerves, pregnancy, and miscarriage
I'm a nervous wreck. Just cried over babies' pics. Always anxious like something not-so-good gonna happen right now, or, to my shame, scared that I'm actually pregnant. Women after miscarriage keep talking about how stressful it was for them to get pregnant again. But they only talk about fear during pregnancy. We've been trying really hard for ( Read more... ) -
Facebook писанина на полочку 5
Cat's psychology
Cat's psychology while taking a bath:
1. What's happening? Why are they closing the door???? Why so much water????? What have I done?????????? Why are they punishing me???????????????
2. Submission. Minimize the pain, don't move and look for the way to get out (like a suddenly opened door). Don't fight so they don't get mad and get ( Read more... ) -
Facebook писанина на полочку 4
Existential
Living is a wonderful gift. We come to the life, we cherish it, we blame it, we love it and we hate it. Every moment that passes by us fills us up and empties us. Funny feeling is to know that everything around me is alive and yet is not admired and praised on a daily basis. Life fills up every drop of the rain that falls on a palm tree ( Read more... ) -
Facebook писанина на полочку 3
Я смотрю видео клипы про любовь, про дружбу, про деньги, про всю ту чепуху, что мы называем жизнью. Я слышу мотивы, напевы, мелодии, которые показывают мне как я должна чувствовать. Моя душа поёт и танцует вместе с этой музыкой. Моя душа чувствует с этой музыкой. Моя душа зовёт моё воображение для подпитки всех этих скучно-слащавых образов. И ( Read more... ) -
Facebook писанина на полочку 2
"A feeling of sadness and longing that is not akin to pain, and resembles sorrow only as the mist resembles the rain."
What do people feel when they have nothing to do? Do they think about all the money they could have made and the time they’ve wasted? Or do they think about all the fun they could have had and, again, the time they’ve wasted? Or do ( Read more... ) -
Facebook писанина на полочку 1
Писала как-то на Facebook, дублирую к архичикам.
I've just read somewhere: "Love is capable of much, don't push it away." Well, is it so?
I remember how I loved and I remember how I killed my love. And I did it more than once.
I remember bittersweet taste of my love's blood, when I, with shaken hands, with obscured mind, with confused thoughts, and ( Read more... ) -
Emotionally challenged
Big fucking time