Well hello all, well actually not all just the three poeple that read this page...well used to anyways. Lol im such a sap, i post this for the world knowing even then that only a few poeple could read it, now, no one. Ive also found as of late that no matter how many friends i have, at the points i need them, they all dissapear, they wont awnser ( Read more... )

Sorry its been so long since ive posted... too much to think about and even more to do as of late. I find myself in a vice, i know everything will be taken care of but i just dont want to wait for it to be, i want to have a car now, i want to see her now, i want it all to be ok...now. But alas all of this is out of my hands, only time can help any ( Read more... )

Lol, im finally starting to realize the truth in life, you will lose the poeple around you, i know its sad and most of all random but that shocking realization hit me, the poeple i love and care about the most will leave, in thier own way. the more shocking thing is that the thought doesnt alarm me, like i have been expecting this for a long while ( Read more... )

Im feeling much better mentaly than i have in a long time, im sick as hell tho and not feeling all that flashy physically. But i have begun, in a sense to see things so much clearer than i have in the past, something has changed, when i look at poeple i know, friends or just aquantances i am beggining to see a new light of them, i see thier true ( Read more... )

I find myself deeper and deeper in this darkness, i write this as i am HEAVILY intoxicated finding that the only way to release all my pain and feeling into this world, in the last few days i have felt love, sorrow, pain, dissapointment, fear, anger, and lust beyond control, such a mixing pot of emotion has led me to belive that i am no longer in ( Read more... )

I, yet again have found myself in a dillema, you see i have found a woman who i am in love with but i thought i couldnt have her, but now im finding that that could change, is it wrong ithat i dont care who i hurt as long as i have her? Would it be worth destroying friendships that could turn out to be life long? My obsticle i this is a person, one ( Read more... )

Hello everyone! (that means the two poeple that actually read this journal lol) anyways ive been finding myself in some pretty odd situations the last few weeks, first off i actually felt dread at the fact that someone called me thier defender and one they felt safe with, and also when you pour your heart out to someone (even in online form) it ( Read more... )

I recently found myself in a very strange situation, my birthday is today and i fully came into the realization of something, im in love, true wih someone i will never have but most importantly its someone i promised myself i would never let my feelings become so deep for. I didnt realize it until i dropped said person of at the airport so she ( Read more... )

Welcome one and all to the madness that is the inside of my head...you see im odd...just like the missing Chesire Cat song from Alice in Wonderland that i had the pleasure of listning to last night. I dont see the world or the poeple in it like everyone else does, where some poeple see a wasted life i see the beautity and talent of one not used to ( Read more... )

Hello good poeple of the world, and may i say it is nice to yet again join you all for another lovely day in this bright beautiful world of ours. anyhow, i must speak of things that have plauged my mind for some time now, some of them random, some of them deeper, there have come times as of recent that i have been reverting back to my older and ( Read more... )