it has been ages since i last posted on LJ. not that life has been great, but perhaps i've been learning how to get by in life. also a separate account on my insta under the same moniker helped by being the outlet of ventilation and truthful realizations. it helped with my sanity a little, kept me grounded, and kept me alive ( Read more... )

11.05.17 ( Read more... )

[18:20, 12/8/2016] Fatin KTPH: Chub                      
[18:20, 12/8/2016] Fatin KTPH: Is your roster out?                      
[18:20, 12/8/2016] +65 9668 6224: yes... this morning                      
[18:20, 12/8/2016] +65 9668 6224: all diff de                      
[18:20, 12/8/2016] Fatin KTPH: Omgawd                      
[18:21, 12 ( Read more... )

i was having palpitations and shaking. i could feel the anxiety eating me as my limbs turned cold and lost its colour. it was a strange sight to behold, with the hairs standing up on my skin and the heart racing with the wind ( Read more... )

22.11.16 ( Read more... )

14.11.16 ( Read more... )

after all that i have done, i ask myself, what gives? i stopped instagramming because the bulk of my posts were posted out of sadness and hurt. i didnt need to be reminded of my scars, i could see them for myself. doesnt make sense to cut old wounds over and over again... im gonna be the one who ends up bleeding anyway.

so it is just me and my lj. ( Read more... )

wednesday marks the submission of the thesis and omg, it never felt better. the thesis was a real horror... some 20000 words is really no joke at all. but nothing beats the csr so i'm not complaining. and next is the eternally-dreaded clinicals. for the life of me i cannot understand why the school cant just let us graduate without having a last ( Read more... )

and so my education journey will be coming to an end in 12 days' time and all i can feel is complete dread. i dont know if my mind is subconsciously dreading the one month of clinicals that will start immediately or if it is dreading the 4-year bond that i have to fulfill when i pass out as a staff nurse. either way, it's all work-related. i cant ( Read more... )

aw yeah i'm living on a prayer yeah.

bon jovi is inspiring me tonight, when the deadline looms closer and jillian hasnt read my discussion section yet. it's okay.

we live for the fight when it's all that we've got.