Comments | amberdulen: Out of Rowling's Hands

amberdulen

Out of Rowling's Hands

Jan 06, 2005 09:15

Moved to Livejournal from the RFF because I think it would be fun.

In a discussion about Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, DBIII said:

I want to see Book 6 as written by George R. R. Martin...Harry and Ron die in a grisly attack on the train in Chapter 2, and the rest of the story is Hermione learning how to use sex to dominate Snape.I ( Read more... )

potterverse, writing, hbp, long stories, highlights, books, memes

Comments 99

netbyrd January 6 2005, 08:42:29 UTC

Book 6 by Brian Jacques

http://www.livejournal.com/users/netbyrd/37894.html#cutid1

elaran January 10 2005, 03:05:43 UTC

ROFLMAO! that sounds sadly accurate if that ever were to happen... :P

netbyrd January 11 2005, 17:04:14 UTC

The sad part is how ridiculously easy it was to do that...

elaran January 12 2005, 00:54:26 UTC

lol... tells you how wonderfully formulaic they are...

floorlamps January 6 2005, 09:07:36 UTC

Book 6 by P.G. Wodehouse

Here

Had waaay too much fun there. I need to reread some Jeeves and Wooster now.

--Fwirlski

liwy January 9 2005, 13:55:47 UTC

Could you unlock that entry?

anonymous January 6 2005, 09:26:09 UTC

Book 6 by Tom Clancy

The Muggle governments of Russia and China have been slowly building up a trained guerilla force of witches and wizards for years, with plans to selectively strike at major Muggle population centers and administration facilities.

Harry, who is now an adult and is a mere scholar at Hogwarts, stumbles on a pre-emptive assassination attempt against Dumbledore and finds himself leading a paramilitary team, headed by the Magical Intelligence Agency, on missions around the world to foil the conspiracy. Near the last few pages, it is revealed Voldemort is behind the plot, the last gasps of the conspiracy nearly level Hogwarts with a massive spell attack, and Harry is catapulted to Headmaster of Restored Hogwarts, trying to keep the remnants of the UK's wizards alive.

-JD

Book 6 by Steven King anonymous January 6 2005, 10:43:52 UTC

When Voldemort unleashes a mystical plague, 99% of the world's Muggle population die in a matter of days. Dumbledore is promptly run over by a demon-possessed car. Harry falls into a deep depression, turning to Jack Daniels and Pall Malls for relief; meanwhile, Hermione draws strength from a variety of quasi-religious iconography. It is revealed on page 5 that Ron is going to die, though his demise will not actually take place until book seven. With the assistance of numerous characters from unrelated novels, the youngsters mount an assault on the dark wizard's tower in central Maine; upon reaching the site, they realize that they can only defeat Voldemort with the help of a group orgy and a pressurized boiler.

-Irked

Re: Book 6 by Steven King tahmthelame January 6 2005, 11:50:57 UTC

*applauds* Well played, kiddo. :)

rooks January 6 2005, 14:24:48 UTC

Book 6 by Ernest HemingwayIn Book 5, Dumbledore lied to Harry about Trelawney's prophecy. Dumbledore said that either Harry or Voldemort would die at the end of Book 7. Actually, they are both going to die ( ... )

netbyrd January 7 2005, 06:17:48 UTC

he sits on his broom. Staring into space. In the rain.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
You NAILED this!

chicleeblair January 8 2005, 11:22:07 UTC

Classic.

Hah! subsidaryforge January 8 2005, 18:29:35 UTC

More Hemingway than Hemingway! Have you ever read the Satanic Nurses? (No great loss if you haven't, it's more filthy than funny most of the time, but marvelous Hemingway sketch)

Thread 6