Oh, you know. Walking to and fro, seeking whom to devour. It's what they do. Most people don't notice and aren't meant to, any more than you notice angels. I got on their radar because of a couple of things, one of which I fell into practically by accident and the other of which is kind of a big deal, at least to those assholes. Which, fuck them, because I'm not their puppet. [And he glares at nothing in particular.]
But if you're ever at a crossroads and some smarmy bastard wants to make you a "deal," tell him NO and run away.
Geez. [She rubs her forehead.] And I thought the feds were the worst thing you had to worry about. There's not some kind of supernatural war going on, is there? Of the "all mankind could be at stake" variety?
Oh, always. [His tone is breezy, and he starts a slow spin of his wolf's-head sword cane.] But right now it's no worse than it's ever been. Fortunately, most of the ones who Fell are stone-stupid. If a couple of low-level grunts like me and Guri can take out some pretty heavy hitters, I think mankind's pretty safe for now.
Best to worry about your own soul and leave the big-picture stuff to those of us who're already more or less... intimately involved. Which, don't worry, I'm not gonna bop you on the head with a Bible and yell "Repent, sinner!" at you. I figure everyone's gotta come to faith their own way, and mine was via a torture cave in Afghanistan over a period of seven months. Plus, you know. Face-first into some pretty awful demonic shit. It's either believe Dad's looking out for me for a purpose or go stark raving nuts. Nuts is a bad place. I don't like it there.
I promise you I have no intention of fighting demons in the near future. Not physically, anyway. And, well, I've always believed, just not like this. [At the rest, she frowns.] Sorry that happened to you.
It was a while ago. Other than the needle phobia and the restraint-induced panic attacks, I'm mainly okay. [He gives her a somewhat manic grin.] The stuff of my nightmares these days is a lot worse than some wussy terrorists. [Downplaying it? Is that a thing? Yes, it is.]
And humans aren't even really meant to be in the thick of physical fights with demons. Guri says that's what we've got the Host for. On the plus side, they're not supposed to kill us because that breaks a rule and makes Lucifer cranky. Lu's scary enough when he's cheerful. You do not want to see the Prince of Darkness when someone's pissed him off.
Of course, on the minus side, they're not real big on rules, otherwise they, you know, wouldn't have Fallen.
Oh, Hell is full of factions. And factions within factions. All scrambling for favor and power and using human souls as currency. Lots of infighting. It's pretty wild, but it weakens them, too. A house divided against itself can't stand.
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But if you're ever at a crossroads and some smarmy bastard wants to make you a "deal," tell him NO and run away.
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Best to worry about your own soul and leave the big-picture stuff to those of us who're already more or less... intimately involved. Which, don't worry, I'm not gonna bop you on the head with a Bible and yell "Repent, sinner!" at you. I figure everyone's gotta come to faith their own way, and mine was via a torture cave in Afghanistan over a period of seven months. Plus, you know. Face-first into some pretty awful demonic shit. It's either believe Dad's looking out for me for a purpose or go stark raving nuts. Nuts is a bad place. I don't like it there.
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And humans aren't even really meant to be in the thick of physical fights with demons. Guri says that's what we've got the Host for. On the plus side, they're not supposed to kill us because that breaks a rule and makes Lucifer cranky. Lu's scary enough when he's cheerful. You do not want to see the Prince of Darkness when someone's pissed him off.
Of course, on the minus side, they're not real big on rules, otherwise they, you know, wouldn't have Fallen.
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