Now faced with reality, that more than likely my feelings are correct. Shane say's he's not sure what he wants, that he doesnt know if he has just been holding on to me, and that he has been forcing it, which is also a feeling I already had. So now, my fear, which will probobly become a reality, he has just been clinging to me like im a fuzzy ( Read more... )

I felt so special when we first met. Everything he said to me was like a poem. Everytime he looked at me, I knew he cared. It was all in his eyes. It was on his lips without him even saying a word. And even though he pushed and pushed for me to fall in love, and pushed for me to take care of him and move away with him, he told me to be "serious ( Read more... )

I can't live like this. I'm not the best woman in the world, and I continuosly blame myself because i'm not beautiful, i'm not good at anything. But it's all too clear. When it comes to hanging out with his friends, HE HAS TO. If he has one plan, and it fails, he get's very anxious unless he is able to go out. If he has plan's to go out and drink, ( Read more... )

No one really know's what a person with an eating disorder goes through, though they think they know, they dont. Do you know what it's like, when your obsession has taken you so far, that food is'nt even an object any more, it has become a number. I can tell you the calories in atleast 20 foods in under 2 minutes ( Read more... )

Ive never been happier in life, I have a wonderful boyfriend and I was blessed with our son, nothing has ever been so rewarding ( Read more... )

Life is wonderful

So here I sit, with little Taylor in my lap. He is so beautiful, curious and innocent, greatest of all, he is my son. I dont know what it is with me, it seems as if im lazy, but im not. Yes, im tired. But I think what it really is, is im letting everything overwhelm me, before I even try to accomplish anything. If I have lots of phone calls to make ( Read more... )

I never imagined being a mother at 22, I never imagined being a mother. And though the past year was definetly the most emotionally challenging ever, spending the whole pregnancy overwhelmed for making a decision and sticking to what a believed in, and feeling guilty that I could cause someone I love so much stress for what I believed, and ( Read more... )

Tomorrow I go back to the doctor, who is supposed to prescribe something to help me. I feel good about this, its hope that im going back in a good direction, and hopefully one day I dont have to deal with depression or eating disorders. I wouldnt know how to rate my depression, if I had to, I do know it isnt as bad as it was while I was pregnant, ( Read more... )

I feel so blessed. Im always trying to think of how to describe the way I feel, as far as being a mother. What usually comes to mind is, you dont really know what love is, until you have a baby, a child of your own. I know how all parents think they have the most beautiful baby, but I know for sure I am the luckiest of them all because Taylor ( Read more... )