the expansion of my heart hurts so much ( Read more... )

i caress its contours
it's flesh reminiscent of dried skin
puckering in places where others have touched it
pilfering through piles, excavating the patches for perfection.

"Never" people often change. They say "never" because of so many reasons. They're afraid, they're looking for something to put faith in...lots of reasons ( Read more... )

i found my voice tonight.
she spoke, in shielded letters and hidden entries to me. through me.
she knows she's there.
and i was reminded.
i have this strength. that strength. all of it.
necessary.
she left me with this:

ahhh, there you are ( Read more... )

i am constructing this easle ( Read more... )

Ist possible i ask so many questions because i am too afeared to live in order to EXPERIENCE the answer??

Did i had to develope the balls to ask difficult questions because it was easier than living and i HAD to know, one way or the other?

i think i need to start searching out my own answers rather than relying on others for them, as little or ( Read more... )

i remember i used to come here when i had nowhere else to go. get a computer that faced out the window, so i could stare at the sun i couldnt' bare to be outside with ( Read more... )

i have difficulty saying no to others because i fear being told no ( Read more... )

for the first time since Matt so kindly helped me fall a little more into my skin, or at least my hair, i was ashamed of it. I had to face my parents after they returned from their trip and i decided that they eventually had to deal with it, so why not right away ( Read more... )

i have no idea why anyone likes me as a friend, let alone anything else.i need to get over this ( Read more... )