I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore. I'm leaving the community. All I do is fast, binge, purge. I'm so sick of it. I'm killing myself. As I rehearsed Paquita today, I thought. I could drop dead any second. My heart could stop. It scared the shit out of me. Today was the first day in two years I actually was happy with how I looked. I really hope you ( Read more... )

Ick! I'd been doing so great! Then I binged. I binged last night at like 11 pm! What? I never binge at night! RRrrrrrr! I'm going to fast until Wednesday. I would fast longer, but I have rehearsals from 4-10 every night this week cuz we have performances Friday-Sunday (4). I know that if I fast for more than two days, I will faint. I am in four ( Read more... )

Yes! Today has been great! I was at rehearsal for 6 hours today (from 10-4) and I feel great! All I've had is two diet mountain dews and a piece of gum! They had sandwiches there during our break, but I didn't eat one (which is different for me cuz I'm a huge sandwich person)! It was awesome! AND the best part is that my mom and dad had a huge ( Read more... )

Today has been great! All I've had is a diet mountain dew and 4 pieces of gum. Only 20 calories!!! I am so excited! I have an audition today though, and I have no energy! Maybe I'll have half a rice cake, which is only 17.5 cals. Well, I hope I won't have to, but it all depends on how feel. Well, good luck girls and stay strong!

Yay! Today went really well! All I've had today is two pieces of gum and a diet coke! I feel great! I haven't even had any hunger pains! My best friend tried to literally force-feed me her tator tots and nachos (eeewwww) at lunch today, but I refused! My plan is working great! I cannot wait until I start to get skinny and people notice! Good luck ( Read more... )

It is not fair. My parents always get in the way of my fasting! I was sick today, and my mom made me eat a smoothie, a bowl of soup, and a tortilla. She just sat there and watched me eat it! I was doing sooo good too! I was so motivated. I couldn't make myself throw up though because I have a sore throat and it hurt too bad. Well, I guess I'll ( Read more... )

Yay! Nothing today in my mouth except water and a cough drop! I have a question: HOW MANY CALS IN 1 RICOLA COUGH DROP? I hope not many! But yeah, that's all. I'm sick today, and does anyone know how many cals in egg drop soup? I haven't eaten any, but it's supossed to make you feel better, and I feel crummy. Oh well. Anywayz, I won't have any ( Read more... )

name: ashley ( Read more... )

Ick Ick Ick. I ate sooo much this weekend. I'm sick tody, and I had a bowl of cereal and a bowl of soup. I feel better, but my stomach feels like it has exploded it's sooo full. I feel like a complete fat ass. Not to worry: Tomorrow I'm starting the 0nlyThreeWeeks plan. However, I have a performance in two weeks, and I may have to eat a little ( Read more... )

Today was great! Only one piece of gum! (like 5 cals)!!! Awesome! Tonight is the church retreat! Since it's at 6, I'll just tell everyone I ate when I was at home. It's just tomorrow: We're there all day until 9 pm! There's no way I'll get out of eating! Crap. I got my picture taken for ballet (a bare shoulder & head shot) -I made the senior ( Read more... )