Determine why in the world I was there. I was also trying to determine what it was that I would do. Did I actually want to see her? Or, like with my apartment, did I simply want to recollect the memories, and let the hurt pass through me? At first I thought about throwing pebbles at her window. But that had all sorts of problems I thought. What if ( Read more... )

It was rather strange to be able to see her again. The idea came to me as I was driving from Jupiter to my parents' house, talking on the phone with TiJan. I came up with all the ideas why talking to her would be a bad idea. I was most likely still vulnerable. It was late. It might affect her adversely. She might not even be there. Plus, what did I ( Read more... )

I've feeling weird. It's kinda of an unsettling feeling. I can't really tell what it is, but I think I'll need to deal while I figure it out. I've got a conference in Miami. I'm curious to know how it'll go. Maybe it'll give me something for my mind to do. Or maybe I'll be too distracted to be able to do much. But either way, it happens once a year ( Read more... )

I slept, perhaps dreaming, though I could not remember what it was I dreamt. I could only recall the feeling I it left me with. I'd hate to rely on lyrics by John Mayer but, our love was so comfortable. It inspired me today, actually to look into playing the song. It sounds really nice so far actually--I've been practicing it for a bit and I'm ( Read more... )

Strangely, something possessed me to revisit my old home. Perhaps all this reminiscing created this urge to relive the environment. Perhaps I felt that I had ran away and blocked it out when I had left. Maybe I needed to return in order to face it. I haven't had time to process it really, so I'll write what I was thinking and the actions I took ( Read more... )

Rummaging through memory lane---Aug 8, 2007 ( Read more... )

It's been a long time since I've posted to Live Journal. I'm not sure if anyone will read this. I can say to myself that I don't particularly care, but I would be lying to myself. In the past I've often said that I don't care what others think about me. And while that's true in many regards, I don't think it's the real me. The fact is, I, like most ( Read more... )

So... the only real eventful thing is that I really wanted to punch this kid's face in. I was waiting for him to call me gay again so I can throw down. It's strange--I've never felt such violent urges before. Maybe he just really pissed me off.

Also I got Devil May Cry 4--awesome game so far.

I apologize for the terribly short and dry update--I just remembered to keep up with this (not a good sign considering this is day 2, lol ( Read more... )

I'm hoping to finally be able to produce a consistent, day-to-day account of my life. I've come to learn that while living in the past is dangerous, forgetting it is just as foolish. So from now on, the day's events will be logged after the day has completed, to include thoughts and events ( Read more... )