Well tonight Ive realized I gott a go on with my life.Tim has made his choice and I just need to go on without him.I feel so much better about myself.I started my diet today and Ive realized that them cds are really helping me.Ive noticed within a couple weeks use that Im not as hungry as I was and that Im using the stress with Tim to motivate me ( Read more... )

Today,off work.they only have me sceduled for 20 hours this wek.Gosh,I need another job!A full time one.

Today would have been my dads birthday if he was alive.Ive thought about him off and on all day.I had to work at BP today and pull a double tomorrow.
Cindy had to go to work,Caseys staying at Masons and Tims working with Jeremy at Indiana today.Ashleys says shes spending the night for the first time tonight.well gotta get some z's!!!

Well its very late and I need to go to bed.went to my first training day and it looks positive.I think I can do good with this company.tim got upset cause I had my mind on it when he brought Casey over and I didnt pay any attention to him.He said he seent he old me,but really I seent he Old Tim.the way he likes to control my life.I cant allow him ( Read more... )

Well this will be the first time I write in this journal while I am moved and settled in at the apartment here.I really do like it here.Its kinda like a house,an upstairs,3 bedrooms and all the extras.And nobody bothers me here,I like it.I got done making banana nut bread awhile ago and fudge.Tim brought the kids to spend the night tonight.I fixed ( Read more... )

Today would have been Tim and I 22nd Anniversary,but we didnt make it that far.Our divorce was final on November 1st.Weve been up and down.But now that hes mad at Paula and the others,maybe we can become even closer than weve been lately.But the hurt and stuff will take a long time to mend.Im not rushing things at all.I have to KNOW myself things ( Read more... )

Its been a long time since I wrote in here,my life seems so changed now.Im going through a divorce with Tim.It should be final any day now.I think now I know that I love him and always have.But I also know that happiness is a two way street and that I cant go back to the way things was.the way he was and the thinking I done towards him causing me ( Read more... )

Well I took Tim the letter last night telling him how I truly feel.I know I love him but Im scared.Im scared of the answer being no and Im scared of the answer being yes.Im scared of myself.But if the answer is yes,then I have to try my hardest to get better thats all there is to it.If its no,then I have to go on with my life.I think I wan tto go ( Read more... )

Well today I have to do it.I cant stay and be close to him in his anger.I worry about my kids and I know theyll be hurt so badly about all this.I just dont know what other choice I have.I cant go on like this.Theyll be crushed,but I sure hope that in thier hearts and minds theyll always KNOW that my love will never go away for them ( Read more... )

Well today I cleaned some and ran round selling selling junk.Ive got some things I need to so tomorrow,even though its going to be so hard,I have to do them ( Read more... )