I just wanna fucking talk to someone and stupid AIM won't give me my fucking buddylist.

and no one will fucking call me because no one ever does. damnit.

"and I could never do anything right ( Read more... )

pictures of me. heh. enjoy kids.

( rock out )

well... I guess your silence answers my question.

in the last two days I've gotten 3.5 hours of sleep and spent 11 some hours talking to Jay.

in the last two days I've written poems, started a story, jotted down these lines that I think are just great... or they could be, given the appropriate context.

I talked to him about those things you don't talk to people about. it was good.

I just spent six plus hours on the phone with this guy Jay. (he wrote The Women Part IV which I posted a link to on here forever ago.) it was so ridiculous ( Read more... )

Vibrators-Amphetamine Blue ( Read more... )

why the fuck is she IMing me?

why does she care so much about what I think? I don't fucking hate her. I don't fucking know her. and I don't really want to. I wrote one pissed off thing in here because of a comment he made in Natalie's journal and it just upset me.

what the fuck is going on?

I manage to fuck everything up so deliciously.

fuck me.

checking my email obsessively. afraid. confused dark blank lack of control. I have a lot of directions bouncing within me. it crushes me heart to not have your reponse and yet I'm worried that getting it will only make the ache worse.