I feel sick... i can't breathe, no fluids are flowing in my body, my eyes are dry my mouth is dry throat soar, im drinking water like no tomorrow but its just not working. It feels like shit but what am I gonna do. Watched a movie with arianna tonight. Alex called her mid movie, and right then i knew i was in the way of something, I asked her if ( Read more... )

My mom is taking me out of school, she believes im not doing good enough and im not showing effort around the house this summer. She doesn't think I'll do better and she wants me to go to a community college. Meaning I'm not coming back. I can't hold a job down here I don't want to live here at all. Many ideas are racing through my head, one that ( Read more... )

I been waiting for what i think is long enough for my best friend to come back to me and talk things out. I dunno if he still needs more time or not but i do know that I'm not going to stay changed the way I am if its not going to help at all. I told myself and him that i would refuse to talk to Arianna for as long as must be. I was hoping that ( Read more... )

SO i get home from driving myt dad to get our car from the mechanic... and for some reason im just so down... tired from work mixed with stress mixed with comfortable seats. But i take the cd's out of my dad's car and start looking through them and saw learn to fly by foo fighters on one of the cds. I was like OMG I know what I have to do, find ( Read more... )

I went to talk to him today. Wow he is really pissed about this, wouldn't get up to talk to me refused in all ways possible ( Read more... )

tonight as drunk as i am... I said the worst thing that could ever be said by a man... I trusted a friend too much and he freaked out over an incident. Of course it is definiately my fault but i apologized to him and showed him it was all my fault. Still he insist's on blaming it on anonther that was invovled. I ended up kissing my best friends ( Read more... )

I have been believing that someone hasn't really appreciated my company in the past couple of weeks. Maybe I'm being a real bother to him im not sure, but I think he has gotten sick of me. They told me that we are going to study after dinner. I had eaten earlier and I thought I'd wait for them. Never got word back from them. Come nine o clock... ( Read more... )

wow, i actually meant to say this the day after my last entry. Umm we had a chance at redemption the next day so i agreed to do the play one last time. Well they got Ryan, the writer of the play to come again and watch. This time, the play went perfect so im really glad about that. This past week was hell though because it went by soooooo sloooooow ( Read more... )

ummm.... i hate how im so good at fucking up. Everything fucks up or turns around and hits me right in the face. Well a repeat of my Crane audition came to haunt me. I screwed up one small thing in the play and like removing the keystone in an arch it all fell apart. I guess im not fit for any kind of thing i like or feel I might be good at doing. ( Read more... )

I don't wanna talk to anyone, I just feel this huge anger, dunno why, but i just do... ummmm everyone can go to hell for all i care, nothing big happened so don't get all worried about me, that will make matters worse, and don't be offended if i get all attitudy around you, its my fault that im pissed at you all, now jagg off! I swear to god you ( Read more... )