i'm moving to colorado

they grow and shrink. they are unreal and unheard of. strange and shaking i see new light and find new truths. faces to names, relationships winding.

i dont feel real, containing no truth in any life.

shake and quake. want and crave. so strange and distant this all is. a picture of a picture. except there was no picture in the first place.

the only pictures taken of you in the last 4 months or so have been one by a drunk in a bar, imidiately dealted apon request, and two taken at work from your father's picture phone can make one feel.....invisible. not quite invisible but as though my fabric of exsistance is shallow with no proof of it's truth and resonance.

voids of fear separate us. bring us together. i'm terrified. just breathe and trust.

shuffle ( Read more... )

i wear the clothes of the past and feel haunted. "what's wrong?" everything? nothing? there is no answer. for there is constant wrong and not enough right to feel good about most anything. but someone saw it, recognized it, and inquired. most importantly inquired. shows care ( Read more... )

nothing. i smoke and drink and fight and fuck. and work.

time for a little change.i hope

i think i've been drinking too much. every night for the last....three weeks? yeah. a need a break.

all over the place! my heart jumps all over the place and i find niches that i am just me. philosophy club, wine, and coffee.

happy fucking holidays to all!

i fucking hate you