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[apophasis]

Because such things amuse me.

Some of these aren't too bad actually:
http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk/language/analogies.html

The most dapper guide to fighting I've ever seen:http://ejmas.com/

Comments

[prettydark]

McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.

I think this vivid phrase is actually pretty awesome.

[lelahel]

I particularly like the analogies! :)

[fallen_lamia]

It's nice to know I'm not the only one who spends a fair amount of time at work surfing the net while pretending to be productive. ;)

[madfishmonger]

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
Direct Douglas Adams reference there. I've read these, but they're always amusing. I don't think they're bad analogies, I think in the right context they're brilliant.

I shared that fighting page with darkvictoria, it's terribly amusing and makes me want to walk with a stick.

[sslounge]

That manual makes me want to grow muttonchops, wear a horizontally striped shirt and a derby, then attack the next man I see carrying an umbrella!