I think it is so strange that ever since summer started, I have been hanging out with people who don't go to my high school. I suppose it's not weird, but instead of reaching out for those who I have spent a good 18 years with, it's almost like I'm shrinking away from them. With the onset of college looming in the dark foreground, perhaps it's ( Read more... )

Wind blows the tall grasses in different directions, and waves roll over the meadow, like the waves of a long, light curtain billowing in the breeze. Everything is connected, like the fibers of the fabric. There is no resistance; things are peaceful. When raindrops fall onto the tall grasses, they roll down their tall stalks until they reach the ( Read more... )

Today I have been really motivated to go out running. Although this may not seem like a big deal to those not athletically-challenged, the actual desire to run is a new one for me. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty darn miserable. I just wanted to write this down, so the next time I'm not feeling motivated (for me, probably tomorrow) I can look ( Read more... )

Sometimes I wish I could return to wonderful times in my life. Maybe not wonderful times, but wonderful moments. I feel like sometimes I go through life too passively, floating like a ghost in purgatory between those wonderful moments, when suddenly the clouds part and one can see the gates of heaven. Wonderful moments are tricky. Sometimes I ( Read more... )

When I grow up and live in my own apartment, or house, or shack, or box on the corner, I want to have a wall of books. (Although this may seem impossible in a box, perhaps stacks will do). I want to be able to run my fingers over the spines, over the endless rows. I love the idea that at any moment, you can pick up a book and read the same words ( Read more... )

Singing in the shower should be sacred and protected. I love standing under the warm stream of water and belting out songs, or parts of songs, or made up songs and today Kayla totally violated that by standing outside the door with her friend on the phone to laugh at me. Showertime singing should be sacred.

Today I was in the car outside Store24 waiting for my father to return at 12:04 am. I was sitting, listening to Coldplay, watching a crazed man stroll across the street. I looked to my left, and stared at the side mirror. It was so eerie. The streets were completely empty, and two sets of light shone green for no one. It was my own lonely ( Read more... )

Right now as I was sitting at the computer, listening to the crickets and the hum of the computer, this feeling of loneliness swept over me like waves crashing on the shore. I feel as if my insides have solidified into one solid mass that is heavier than my skin, heavier than my thoughts. My mother just walked by back into her room and slammed ( Read more... )

Today Jess invited me to come swimming and I must say it was so wonderful. We walked to the reservoir, through the woods on the straight path, using the dim light of Jason's cell phone. I feel like I have satisfied my inner rebel. The air was so warm and perfect that I just wanted to spread my arms and fly away. Through the trees were flashes ( Read more... )

I love being around in the night. I feel like I can disappear into the darkness. Not in a suicidal sense, but in a cleansing, accepting sense. The streets are so quiet and empty. The light of the streetlamp spills out onto cars and cracks in the sidewalk and the gatherings of moths. I love the breeze blowing through the branches of the trees, ( Read more... )