Last Mom update

May 15, 2012 13:28

Hello my friends -- long time no talk to you. Unfortunately, this time I come as the bearer of bad news. My mother, Bernice, passed away on Monday, May 7. She was 86 years old ( Read more... )

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 19:49:47 UTC
You're right, Lib. She fought the good fight but even that has an end eventually. Thanks, sweetie. She was x0

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lovethosehobbit May 15 2012, 19:56:45 UTC
Oh, sweetheart, I am sooo sorry to hear of this. I agree with you wholeheartedly tho' once quality of life is lost, I really don't want to live any longer. I remember my dad telling me, at age 98.."I wish I'd died when I was 85. I could still walk and see and I wasn't in constant pain." Working in a hospital I am a very pragmatic person. I know that no one gets out alive in this world and have seen a lot of people fight hard to stay alive when their number is up. I don't blame them...my mother for one is terrified of dying. I told her it's part of living and even tho' no one really knows what happens next I have to think there is something we're destined for after this world. I am sending my deepest sympathies to you.

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 20:08:43 UTC
Thank you, sweetheart. You know, the sad irony is that we can give a beautiful, humane gift to our pets, to stop their pain, but we can't do the same for our human loved ones. I don't really know the value of suffering -- for what reason? My mother's life had been crap for probably three, four years even prior to the trauma of the last eighteen months. During that time, she survived years of constant back pain that was very poorly managed, shingles, scabies, C. diff., emergency colon surgery, the horror of the colostomy bag, a bleeding ulcer and then the colostomy reversal surgery. Not to mention two terms of rehab and several hospital stays. For what??? So right now, it doesn't really surprise me that my overwhelming emotion is relief. No one you love should have to go through all that.

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lovethosehobbit May 15 2012, 20:18:53 UTC
Amen. My dad loved where he lived. He played his guitar and sang and all of the old ladies swooned over him, which he really liked. Then he got this cellulitis in his arm pit and instead of treating it with some serious IV drugs they gave him some amoxicillin and call us in the morning. He suffered 2 long years before finally falling asleep and never waking up. I don't have a grudge about him dying, I have a grudge about how he was treated as insignificant by the doctor assigned to him at his care facility. I think doctors over care facilities have the attitude of 'well, they're dying anyway' and hope that when it is their time to die, they finally understand that these people lived through the worst time in US history and are human beings that demand our respect. Oh, listen to me on my soap box...I say live each day like it's your last, kiddo.

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 20:20:28 UTC

I say live each day like it's your last, kiddo.

Funny -- my father used to say that. He died at 57. And he was right ;) x0

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arabia764 May 15 2012, 20:24:45 UTC
I am so very, very sorry for your loss.

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 21:05:18 UTC
Thank you x0

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 21:03:51 UTC
It's truly amazing to watch someone leave. But I'm sure you're right. It will probably hit like a ton of bricks the first time I reach for the phone to call her and she's not there.

Thanks, luv x0

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aliensouldream May 15 2012, 21:03:16 UTC
I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. Your journey has been so hard but I think it must be a tribute to both of you that you were her mainstay right to the end. My truest sympathies and I hope after some time passes, there is some comfort in your good memories of you both together. Wishing you a peaceful healing time. *hugs*

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aquila0212 May 15 2012, 21:04:43 UTC
Thank you for your lovely words, my dear. They are truly appreciated x0

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