somedays the depression is unbearable. its really hard to loose one of your best friends. especially when they dont seem to care or remember the love there was. they have new friends now, new best friends so it doesn't matter to them anymore. but me, im always the one left behind in these situations. i think about it everyday. i get this ( Read more... )

yea so i still feel kinda shitty. im so tired and I just wana go smoke that joint that's sittin in my backpack but i dont wana waste it. if i smoke it, ill just go to sleep. this weekend im going pipe shopping for my (get this) very first weed pipe. Yes it will be a special event boys and girls. special indeed. pooey. im trying not to think ( Read more... )

Ok so I will be the happiest girl in the world if someone could tell me where to find

HALLOWEEN OREOSYou know the oreos with the orange frosting in the middle. There might be a prize involved for someone who would be so kind as to share this information with me. I am a desperate woman. andy took me to 3 different places yesterday and nobody ( Read more... )

here i am so pathetic. just went down stairs to "get the mail" aka smoke a joint. it was the worst joint in the history of joints. now im watching Erin Brockovich on dvd eating smore's poptarts. the first time they were so burnt i had to throw em out. yummy now. so lonely.

i know this is probably the least of my problems right now, but I have the hardest time finding cute shit on ebay that accomodates skinny girls with big breasts. ok, so I know they dont look that big, but I'll tell you that I do not fit into a size small corset. yet, a size large corset is too wide for my waist. i guess im just obsessed with a ( Read more... )

so i took the SAT again yesterday at Uni with Claire, Koichi adn Andy. We were all in the same room. It seemed a lot easier than it was last time. I stayed awake the whole time, didn't fall asleep once, which was great. I dunno. I hope it was as easy as i thought. anywhoo... after that we all went back to my house and just chilled while ( Read more... )

im sitting here watching drag races and eating life cereal out of the box. sooo hungry and cold. im not feeling so great. lynn quit. im pretty heart broken. so i went to go hang out with her last night at her friend Lauren's and Victoria's. We were painting laurens room cuz she just moved in. victoria is fucken crazy man. she's an artist ( Read more... )

today andrew was supposed to pick me up early so we could spend time together and sleep in the back of the forerunner. I love him. I know I always say that but he's like my other half. The one person in life I know I can always count on. the one who knows me almost more that anyone (some CANT know me in some ways hehe :)) But he woke up late ( Read more... )

ive been a bit of a shuttin lately. i get that way. i suppose it has to do with my kidneys. I got an ultrasound on them on friday, which looked ok, there weren't any abcesses. im on my last treatment and if that doesn't work i have to go get intravenus treatments at St. Johns. fuck them kidney. i had a dream last night that made me so mad i ( Read more... )

i dunno why i let all these things get to me. im sensitive lately. filling with regret trying to remember why. pissed off that im that person i used to hate but really that person i used to hate was the person i should be. i hate gossip, especially when someone tells someone else something that's not true. perhaps i could have been friends ( Read more... )