(no subject)
I haven't updated the quote board since the beginning of the semester, and I have over three pages of them!
[A student in Dr. H's class says she just moved here from Austin]
Dr H: my brother lives on Ruth [St.]
Talita: Really?
Dr. H: Yeah. The corner of Ruth and Arroyo. Across from the church.
Talita: …Jack?
Dr. H: YES!
Brie: I'm ginger.
*laughter*
Dr. H: what does that mean?
Ash: Redhead.
Dr. H: Oh.
Brie: Only gingers are allowed to call other gingers ginger.
Dr. H: oh, I'm sorry.
Brie: No, I'm kidding.
Priya has apparently never had a cat before.
Priya: She is taking up 2/3 of my bed and leaving me 1/3.
Ash: Yeah, that sounds about right.
[I told Leah about the " apocalypse cow" situation with the crashed cow truck.]
Leah: Oh, the humanity! …or rather, Oh, the bovinity!
Andrea: You went there.
Leah: Yes I did.
Michael: Well if you didn't I was going to.
[We ended up playing the Bible version of Apples to Apples. It's not nearly as fun as the original version, but there were some fun bits. Someone put down "Delilah" for "tasty." And Tanya won "patient" with "the ten virgins".]
Tanya: Finally! …GIVE ME MY CARD!
[We did the traditional "read off your green cards and they describe you" thing at the end.]
Ashley: I'm "light" and "harmful". …Sounds like a cigarette ad.
Dr. Z: have you ever been to a hog farm? *silence* We need to go on a field trip.
Christina: NOOOOOOOO!!!
[Discussing Dr R's class which I thankfully never had to take:]
Brie: You write something and then you reflect on it and then you reflect as a group and then you reflect on the group work.
Ash: And then he reflects on your reflection.
Brie: And then you reflect on his reflection.
Talita: it's like that scene in [some horror movie] with the room with the mirrors!
Ash: It's like Inception! Reflection Inception!
Brie: Refleption… reflexception!
All: REFLEXCEPTION!
Talita: I'm laughing so hard there are tears in my eyes.
[I call the house. The phone rings a couple times.]
*someone picks up*
Mom: IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.
Me: What is?
Mom: OZZY JUST WANTS US TO PLAY WITH HIM ALL THE TIME.
[Square dancing. Caller is teaching us the pattern, says that if you get lost, wait till the swing with your partner.]
My partner: That's true. You're my landmark.
Me: Are you calling me fat?
Partner: No, I'm saying you're something to remember!
Me: Okay, I forgive you.
Dr Z, discussing incest in the novel we're reading. Misspeaks: Why raise the specter of insects?
Brandon: It really bugs us.
Dr. Z: Dr. D and I were having one of our ladies' rooms meeting the other day. Most of the business of the dept really gets done in the ladies' room.
Jason: That's what I do when I write about women. I dress in women's clothing.
Dr. Z, on Clarissa: We're gonna go back at the end and read the alternative ending!
Ash: It's like DVE extras!
[Clarissa is literally the longest novel in the English language. Although we had an abridged version, it was still a bit torturous.]
Jason, on the section in the back of our copy of Clarissa that had some of the 18th century reactions to the novel: Some of the reactions were really funny. They were like, "I kept crying and putting it down." I was like, "Yeah, me too, but for different reasons."
Dr. Z on trying to find a mission statement for the department: So we were trying to come up with a catchy phrase to define us. So in your experience if there is a catchy, PRINTABLE phrase, please let us know. Don't say like "delightfully dysfunctional" or anything.
Dr. Z, discussing Clarissa in Freudian terms: Because of primogeniture, the firstborn son is in charge before the father is even dead. James [Clarissa's horrible brother] is in charge instead of the father.
Brandon: James is the phallus.
Renee, Dr. Z and myself in unison: Yes he is. He's a dick.
Dr. H: [discussing whether you liked the reading on voice and style] I agree. I found him so sure of himself and so smarmy. It's partly because he seems like the kind of teacher in the 70s who's like, "I can help you find your soul. Why don't you come back to my house."
Student: THAT's what you got out of this??
*We've just done a service project that involves buying things, and we’re bringing the shopping bags into the house at Bible study. Sally and Jeremy start singing “Bringing in the Sheaves”*
Rich: I guess we should actually just take these straight out to the car.
*Sally and Jeremy start singing “Taking out the Bags” to the tune of “Bringing in the Sheaves”*
Cara: You guys could be a musical group!
Jeremy: And now some special music…
Sally: “Special.”
Connie: When we lived in [some state in the south] there was a commercial for this furniture store and they said “We sail roun tables an squire tables…” It took us YEARS to figure out what “squire tables” were.
Sally: They’re a little shorter than “[k]night tables”.
Martha: This is my sister. Don't we look alike? There are three of us, and one time a few years ago we were all together and a stranger came up to us and said, "You three MUST be sisters-you look so much alike!" Our sister answered without thinking, "That's because we were born back when you all had the same father!"
*Discussing "Rosemary's Baby" from a scholarly point of view*
Dr. Z: It's wonderful! She's drugged, she's raped, and she gives birth to Satan!
Christina: …That doesn't sound wonderful.
Ash: Your name is Yavanna?
Yavanna: yes.
Ash: from Tolkien?
Yavanna: Yes! I was named for a goddess. I had a big head as a kid. "You can't ground me; I'm a deity!!"
Christina: How is contract grading? My students say it's convenient.
Brandon: Yeah, like socialism's convenient.
Had some interesting segues during Shakespearean movie night:
*between discussions of Titus Andronicus and Medea*
Ash: Speaking of eating children…
*between discussions of some movie (I don't remember what) and Sunset Boulevard*
Ash: Speaking of floating dead in a pool…
Ash, stretching out across the entire couch and Sally's lap: I was raised by cats.
Dr. Z: I bet you've never seen this in a grad seminar before: a prof impersonating a chicken.
[We also learned about the violent sex life of chickens that morning.]
[The question of whether or not Priya has ever interacted with cats before was finally answered to my satisfaction when I had to reassure her that the funky vibrating thing the cat was doing was not a symptom of respiratory failure. The cat was just purring.]
Dr. Z on the Burney Society: They're like the Austenites, only they don’t dress up.
Dr Z, on the 18th century novel Cecilia: I mean, they're not gonna get the castle, but Cecilia's building her own estate. Probably has a bathroom!
At contradance, they teach us a move called a “ribbon snort” (at least, that’s what we HEARD). The caller had us do a dance that was almost a simon says game, and at various points we would have to do the ribbon snort, and one pair of girls in our square would frantically start shouting, “RIBBON SNORT! RIBBON SNORT!”
Ashley: My mom wanted to make sure I got along with you before I decided to room with you. And I said "Yeah, we got along fine." And I said, “And I like her husband, too. He visits every other weekend.” And Mom was like, “…”
Andrea: Yeah. We have Naked Thursdays.
Elizabeth: My bruises have bruises.
Ash: What did you do?
Elizabeth: I rolled down a hill at Stroud's Run.
Ash: On PURPOSE?
Elizabeth: Yes! There were rocks at the bottom and the ground was muddy. I wasn't ABOUT to WALK down!
[A student in Dr. H's class says she just moved here from Austin]
Dr H: my brother lives on Ruth [St.]
Talita: Really?
Dr. H: Yeah. The corner of Ruth and Arroyo. Across from the church.
Talita: …Jack?
Dr. H: YES!
Brie: I'm ginger.
*laughter*
Dr. H: what does that mean?
Ash: Redhead.
Dr. H: Oh.
Brie: Only gingers are allowed to call other gingers ginger.
Dr. H: oh, I'm sorry.
Brie: No, I'm kidding.
Priya has apparently never had a cat before.
Priya: She is taking up 2/3 of my bed and leaving me 1/3.
Ash: Yeah, that sounds about right.
[I told Leah about the " apocalypse cow" situation with the crashed cow truck.]
Leah: Oh, the humanity! …or rather, Oh, the bovinity!
Andrea: You went there.
Leah: Yes I did.
Michael: Well if you didn't I was going to.
[We ended up playing the Bible version of Apples to Apples. It's not nearly as fun as the original version, but there were some fun bits. Someone put down "Delilah" for "tasty." And Tanya won "patient" with "the ten virgins".]
Tanya: Finally! …GIVE ME MY CARD!
[We did the traditional "read off your green cards and they describe you" thing at the end.]
Ashley: I'm "light" and "harmful". …Sounds like a cigarette ad.
Dr. Z: have you ever been to a hog farm? *silence* We need to go on a field trip.
Christina: NOOOOOOOO!!!
[Discussing Dr R's class which I thankfully never had to take:]
Brie: You write something and then you reflect on it and then you reflect as a group and then you reflect on the group work.
Ash: And then he reflects on your reflection.
Brie: And then you reflect on his reflection.
Talita: it's like that scene in [some horror movie] with the room with the mirrors!
Ash: It's like Inception! Reflection Inception!
Brie: Refleption… reflexception!
All: REFLEXCEPTION!
Talita: I'm laughing so hard there are tears in my eyes.
[I call the house. The phone rings a couple times.]
*someone picks up*
Mom: IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.
Me: What is?
Mom: OZZY JUST WANTS US TO PLAY WITH HIM ALL THE TIME.
[Square dancing. Caller is teaching us the pattern, says that if you get lost, wait till the swing with your partner.]
My partner: That's true. You're my landmark.
Me: Are you calling me fat?
Partner: No, I'm saying you're something to remember!
Me: Okay, I forgive you.
Dr Z, discussing incest in the novel we're reading. Misspeaks: Why raise the specter of insects?
Brandon: It really bugs us.
Dr. Z: Dr. D and I were having one of our ladies' rooms meeting the other day. Most of the business of the dept really gets done in the ladies' room.
Jason: That's what I do when I write about women. I dress in women's clothing.
Dr. Z, on Clarissa: We're gonna go back at the end and read the alternative ending!
Ash: It's like DVE extras!
[Clarissa is literally the longest novel in the English language. Although we had an abridged version, it was still a bit torturous.]
Jason, on the section in the back of our copy of Clarissa that had some of the 18th century reactions to the novel: Some of the reactions were really funny. They were like, "I kept crying and putting it down." I was like, "Yeah, me too, but for different reasons."
Dr. Z on trying to find a mission statement for the department: So we were trying to come up with a catchy phrase to define us. So in your experience if there is a catchy, PRINTABLE phrase, please let us know. Don't say like "delightfully dysfunctional" or anything.
Dr. Z, discussing Clarissa in Freudian terms: Because of primogeniture, the firstborn son is in charge before the father is even dead. James [Clarissa's horrible brother] is in charge instead of the father.
Brandon: James is the phallus.
Renee, Dr. Z and myself in unison: Yes he is. He's a dick.
Dr. H: [discussing whether you liked the reading on voice and style] I agree. I found him so sure of himself and so smarmy. It's partly because he seems like the kind of teacher in the 70s who's like, "I can help you find your soul. Why don't you come back to my house."
Student: THAT's what you got out of this??
*We've just done a service project that involves buying things, and we’re bringing the shopping bags into the house at Bible study. Sally and Jeremy start singing “Bringing in the Sheaves”*
Rich: I guess we should actually just take these straight out to the car.
*Sally and Jeremy start singing “Taking out the Bags” to the tune of “Bringing in the Sheaves”*
Cara: You guys could be a musical group!
Jeremy: And now some special music…
Sally: “Special.”
Connie: When we lived in [some state in the south] there was a commercial for this furniture store and they said “We sail roun tables an squire tables…” It took us YEARS to figure out what “squire tables” were.
Sally: They’re a little shorter than “[k]night tables”.
Martha: This is my sister. Don't we look alike? There are three of us, and one time a few years ago we were all together and a stranger came up to us and said, "You three MUST be sisters-you look so much alike!" Our sister answered without thinking, "That's because we were born back when you all had the same father!"
*Discussing "Rosemary's Baby" from a scholarly point of view*
Dr. Z: It's wonderful! She's drugged, she's raped, and she gives birth to Satan!
Christina: …That doesn't sound wonderful.
Ash: Your name is Yavanna?
Yavanna: yes.
Ash: from Tolkien?
Yavanna: Yes! I was named for a goddess. I had a big head as a kid. "You can't ground me; I'm a deity!!"
Christina: How is contract grading? My students say it's convenient.
Brandon: Yeah, like socialism's convenient.
Had some interesting segues during Shakespearean movie night:
*between discussions of Titus Andronicus and Medea*
Ash: Speaking of eating children…
*between discussions of some movie (I don't remember what) and Sunset Boulevard*
Ash: Speaking of floating dead in a pool…
Ash, stretching out across the entire couch and Sally's lap: I was raised by cats.
Dr. Z: I bet you've never seen this in a grad seminar before: a prof impersonating a chicken.
[We also learned about the violent sex life of chickens that morning.]
[The question of whether or not Priya has ever interacted with cats before was finally answered to my satisfaction when I had to reassure her that the funky vibrating thing the cat was doing was not a symptom of respiratory failure. The cat was just purring.]
Dr. Z on the Burney Society: They're like the Austenites, only they don’t dress up.
Dr Z, on the 18th century novel Cecilia: I mean, they're not gonna get the castle, but Cecilia's building her own estate. Probably has a bathroom!
At contradance, they teach us a move called a “ribbon snort” (at least, that’s what we HEARD). The caller had us do a dance that was almost a simon says game, and at various points we would have to do the ribbon snort, and one pair of girls in our square would frantically start shouting, “RIBBON SNORT! RIBBON SNORT!”
Ashley: My mom wanted to make sure I got along with you before I decided to room with you. And I said "Yeah, we got along fine." And I said, “And I like her husband, too. He visits every other weekend.” And Mom was like, “…”
Andrea: Yeah. We have Naked Thursdays.
Elizabeth: My bruises have bruises.
Ash: What did you do?
Elizabeth: I rolled down a hill at Stroud's Run.
Ash: On PURPOSE?
Elizabeth: Yes! There were rocks at the bottom and the ground was muddy. I wasn't ABOUT to WALK down!