It's been a while, I know. I've strangely not been in the mood to do much of anything lately, other than play Dragonrealms. The odd part of that is that I almost always have an urge to write, or read, or something along both lines. I'm not even sure what any of this is about, other than feeling a need to babble and not having anyone around to ( Read more... )

So I was thinking (again, this seems a topic my mind focuses on incredibly often) just a few hours ago about how hard it is for me to truly let go of someone I've loved/love. At the moment the first person that comes to mind is my Grandma. She's very ill, sicker than I've ever seen anyone outside of stories and movies, literally on her deathbed and ( Read more... )

The loneliness has been ebbing and flowing for weeks now. Sometimes I think its gone for good, and just as relief sets in, a memory floods the circuits and it all becomes so overwhelming again. I keep asking myself if its really loneliness, or just a need to feel my age. Normally I throw this idea out of the window, because most people my age act ( Read more... )

My dreams have been such a horrible torment for me lately...but only one of them left me in tears when I awoke..

It was...magical...to put it lightly. We were in the middle of a dense wood, the trees so abundant and lush that they blocked out majority of the sunlight, to the point that if birds weren't chirping I wouldn't have even known it was ( Read more... )

It's funny how most of the time when I get what I wish for it turns out totally different than how I had imagined or wanted it. I remember saying for the longest time "I wish I could remember my dreams more often." What happens when I do? More than half of them turn out to be sex dreams. Aaargh. Most of them are about girls, some that I recognize, ( Read more... )

I'm not sure where or when it started to go downhill, but I do know that the responsibility of either stopping or slowing it's progress has ended up on my shoulders, as always. I don't think you're even aware of it are you? If you aren't, though, then where do the words you spoke last night come from?

"If you left me, I'd only be upset about losing ( Read more... )

So I happened to find Ashes Divide's CD used at FYE, and on a whim decided to buy it. Overall I'd say the album wasn't too much to my taste but there were two or three songs that happened to click with me. One of them I wasn't even too sure why until I looked up the lyrics. Sometimes the universe acts in very strange ways, and anyone who can read ( Read more... )

Run desire run
Sexual being
Run him like a blade
To and through the heart
No conscience
One Motive
Cater to the hollow

Screaming feed me here
Fill me up again
Temporarily pacify this hungering
So grow
Libido throw
Dominoes of indiscretions down
Falling all around
In cycles
In circles
Constantly consuming
Conquer and devour

Cause it's time to bring the fire down
( Read more... )

I've been terribly lonely lately. Add to that a dash of nostalgia, a lot of recent disappointments, and a heaping pile of stress and you'll have yourself a recipe for where I've been the last few days ( Read more... )

I've smoked so much in the last 10 hours that the pain in my lungs almost matches the pain in my eyes from all the tears. It's difficult for me to remember a time when I had so many different emotions bombarding me at once. Anger, frustration, disappointment, depression. I think I even had an anxiety attack just after I got the news, I'm not ( Read more... )