So... I'm back in Ohio on this beautiful Saturday night. I was in Viringia, yes... for 26 hours. This was before I got several phone calls about my mom being in the hospital yet again with blood clots in her lungs and losing the ability to use her hands. I rushed home. I'll go see her in the morning. I knew that this was going to happen. I did. I ( Read more... )

I am really excited about going to see Erik, but at the same time I am really afraid. That fear doesn't come necessarily from him, but it comes from the prospects for the future. What if this is the last time I get to see him? I know that that is an irrational question, but is it? What if I don't get to see him before he goes over-seas? What if ( Read more... )

My family is absolutely unbelievable. I am tired of having them on my back and down my throat all the time with their expectations. My grandmother asked me if I was going to be home next weekend and I said no. I told her that I wouldn't be LAST weekend but she obviously forgot that conversation. Then she gets pissed and says, "Well, I guess that ( Read more... )

I'm pissed off because I miss out on everything because of my fucking home life. When will my life be my own? I'm so tired of this shit.

I really hate days like today. As if I needed any more stress than I already have right now!! Today was the first day back to college and I was actually excited about it this morning apart from the small headache I had from drinking too much wine last night. I got out there with my jeans, t-shirt, and classic black & white chuck taylors, ready to ( Read more... )

Interestingly ironic quote of the day ( Read more... )

I have worked 8 days out of the past 9. I'm exhausted.

One more shift to go.

When am I going to stop expecting the bottom to always drop out?

When am I going to start accepting that it's possible for someone to be in love with me?

When am I going to get rid of these stupid insecurities?

You know, Erik seems to wonder why I am so crazy about him. He can't understand or see the things that I see. I spend a lot of time asking myself the same question, but I always come up with a multitude of answers. (kc, this is going to be a girly entry to the extreme, so run while you can ( Read more... )

I made a little impromptu visit to VA this weekend since all the time I had taken off before this week couldnt be used for its intended purposes. I decided to use that time off for Erik (which I believe is a VERY good person to use my time on). After a lot of debate as to whether or not I should or shouldnt go, I finally packed my bag and was on my ( Read more... )