it was sometime between 2am and the rising of the sun, laying down next to you in a tiny spot you'd dug out for us on the windy, moonlit shore of belmar, new jersey when i confessed that i should have never stopped kissing you. and i suppose, at the time, i meant at that moment. the moment when you tilted my chin toward you and pressed your lips ( Read more... )

i keep saying that i am emotionally void, that i cannot give two shits about another person right now. but who the fuck am i kidding? all i want to do is love and be loved, so why is it so fucking hard?

i havent lived this much in a long time, and i firmly believe it's because you are no longer a part of my life. if you were, i'd be huddled in your room with you, resenting every part of you. the way you don't understand me and the way you are only happy when we're fucking. because that's what it became. me, pinned under you, waiting for you to ( Read more... )

I don't know where I fit anymore.

comfort and solace, peace and serenity. my heart is hard but my eyes are soft from crying too often lately. im SCARED. terrified. petrified. frozen in time, in a moment, in a memory. i preached recently that life is too big and beautiful beyond the sheets, but i'm learning that beauty lies within them, too. and within all of us. it vibrates through ( Read more... )

the warmth between two palms will be enough for awhile

my mind is still spinning from it all, and the best thing that has happened since is songs don't sound quite as helpless to me anymore. im only slightly worried, because i want to know that the moments that occurred (in their truly perfect sequence) don't hurt you, but give you hope again they way they did for me. i'm not sure about you, but i lost ( Read more... )

and i really need this. i hope when i look up, that those stars are brighter than i can recently remember and ( Read more... )

2010 is already proving to be one of the most epic years of my life. epic in both good and bad ways, of course, but really truly mind boggling and crazy. last season of lost, last coheed album, last semester of school. no hope for salvaging what used to be my relationship but only hope for the things to come.

if you would let me, i would hold you forever. i hate that you sleep so much because i think the world beyond the sheets is too bright and undiscovered to be wasted, but im starting to realize why it has become a form of security for you. i dont like picturing you in bed, eyes glazed over, slipping in and out of consciousness. and when you are ( Read more... )