Comments | average_homos: Hello out there

kabo11 in average_homos

Hello out there

Jul 23, 2009 09:44

I just thought I'd like to introduce myself as I have made myself a new member! I'm a 29 year old guy from Calgary, Alberta, Canada. I am a bit quirky, slightly offbeat but generally pleasant. I have just been broken up with from a five year relationship that was basically not meant to end the way it did. I am wandering aimlessly so if I seem a ( Read more... )

Comments 19

sourdick July 23 2009, 16:28:06 UTC

You got dumped and you think you shouldn't have? Huh? Explain why you think you should still be with someone who does not want to be with you..

That's not what I said kabo11 July 23 2009, 16:34:19 UTC

I didn't mean that I don't think I should have been dumped. I meant that the best laid plans often get screwed up. I had been stupid enough to make plans around this relationship and it was a mistake.

Re: That's not what I said sourdick July 23 2009, 16:40:32 UTC

You can see why someone might understand it that way, since its pretty vague the way you wrote it.

Why is it stupid to make plans with someone you've been with for five years?

Re: That's not what I said kabo11 July 23 2009, 17:11:12 UTC

Its stupid in that life persists in throwing curveballs at us and making too many plans is foolish. I built all these expectations around him but I suspected it was too good to last. I made some fairly glaring errors in terms of what I expected.

Thread 15

evil_admiral July 24 2009, 02:55:00 UTC

1. Welcome!
2. Having been in one before, I can say that long distance things are not easy to do. It takes a special bond to really make it work successfully.
3. Being the younger one in my relationship, I can say that us youngins' are kind of prone to flightiness. Sometimes the underlying issue can be fixed, other times it just can't.
4. No matter what type of relationship, remaining closeted can make it that more difficult. Especially if the other person is out.

So, all you need to if rework your plans. Plan life our for you, on your terms. There are plenty of fishes in the sea out there. Actually, its kind of funny. My partner has a friend who is going for a second round of law school up in Calgary (he already has a JD from Case Western), and I think he just got over a break-up too.

kabo11 July 24 2009, 16:27:26 UTC

I will deal with your numbered points one at a time :P!

1. Thank you!
2. I thought my ex and I had that bond but I realize I was taking it for granted and it drifted away.
3. I think you are correct. I also realize that its important for him to have his freedom. He was stifled by me.
4. Yes, it is more difficult and in future, it needs addressing before I get into a relationship.

That IS an interesting little tidbit about your partner's friend! Funnily, my sister is a lawyer here.

c_smudge July 24 2009, 14:05:57 UTC

Hi, welcome

kabo11 July 24 2009, 19:56:34 UTC

Why, thank you!