White Lies
Title: White Lies
Pairing: [one-sided] OnKey, Onew/Taeyeon, implied JongKey?
Rating: G
Genre: Angst
Summary: A little white lie changes everything.
Key opens the dorm's door to a petite, brunette girl.
The girl's eyes were sparkling with tears, and for that reason alone, Key resists the impulse to slam the door on her face.
"O-Oh, hi Kibum. Is J-Jinki around?"
Key forces a concerned smile. "Hi, Taeyeon-noona. I'll just go get him--" Key had barely finished the sentence when Jinki appeared behind him, wearing that gentle smile of his.
"Hi, Yeonnie." Taeyeon gave Jinki a relieved smile before turning an embarrassed one to Key.
"Hi, Jinki." Key slowly closed the door as Taeyeon grasps Jinki's outstretched hand and their fingers intertwine. Jinki smiles softly at him before gently leading the petite girl to one of the spare rooms. Key watches the door close with a soft click behind them.
He stands there for a few moments, gripping the doorknob so hard his knuckles turned white.
He tries not to think of what the two were doing behind that closed door. Knowing Jinki, it would be all innocent. But Key can't help himself.
Taemin comes past and sees him still standing there, and asks if someone was outside the door. Key forces a smile and shakes his head, prying his fingers off the cold steel and following Taemin to the kitchen.
He glances one last time at the closed door, trying to ignore his aching heart.
-------------------------------------------
There was a time when he and Jinki were close. And he wanted to believe they still were.
But ever since that day, their blossoming relationship had come to a quick halt.
Key tells himself he shouldn't be selfish. It was unfair of him to think he could have Jinki to himself forever. Jinki was for everyone, and Key was just one of many people who loved him, relied upon him.
Jinki wasn't just an official leader. He was their older brother, the one willing to carry everyone's burden on his back and still smile while doing it. The one who never complained about anything.
This was what had drawn Key to him. That unique trait of his, the fact that Jinki could be so adorable and clumsy yet gentle and strong at the same time.
Key gripped the handle of the kitchen knife tightly; above all things, he wished he could go back to that day and take back everything he'd said.
The day he'd jokingly said he'd been attracted to Jonghyun and even Minho, and since they had teased him so much, he was forced to lie that he wasn't ever going to be attracted to anyone as clumsy as Jinki.
Jinki's face that day was as fresh in his mind as if it had just happened yesterday. The cheerful smile had faltered, before the older boy had laughed along with everyone and smiled that 'Onew' smile of his.
The 'Onew' smile was fake. It was used for fans when Jinki was exhausted or upset and he didn't want people to worry. It was professional, it was plastic.
Key had been receiving it ever since that day. Ever since he told that little white lie since he was too embarrassed to admit his feelings. Feelings he knew were reciprocated.
It was the same feeling as walking through a bridge with Jinki, the other side holding promises of happiness.
Then a little white lie escapes, and suddenly Key finds himself stuck in the middle of the bridge, Jinki going on without him.
And at the end of the bridge stood Taeyeon.
-------------------------------------------
Key should have known Jinki wouldn't wait for him forever. He wanted to tell Jinki that he was being unfair, not even giving him a second chance.
But Key himself knew he wasn't the only reason for Jinki's withdrawal. Having an odd-numbered group would eventually lead to one of them being the odd one out. Ever since the beginning it had been Jonghyun and Key, and somewhere along the way Taemin found a comfortable companion in Minho.
Jinki was by no means alienated; he was everyone's friend, everyone's confidant. But in terms of a 'best friend', Jinki had no one to call his own.
Perhaps it was inevitable that Jinki would turn to Taeyeon as SNSD's leader, and both were the same age.
Both were thrust into the limelight, forced to grow up and mature a lot faster than their years would allow. Both were given the responsibility to carry their respective groups, and both received the most pressure to succeed, more than anyone else.
And yet, both carried their titles with a mixture of pride and humility; neither wanted to be the constant center of attention nor hogged the mic, most of the time allowing their members to outshine them. They seemed dull in comparison, but when given the opportunity, they shone brighter than the stars.
Key hated the fact that Jinki and Taeyeon fit each other perfectly, as if she were the missing piece in Jinki's puzzle, the one that made him complete.
Most of all, Key hated the fact that it could have been him.
-------------------------------------------
Eventually, that closed door opens and Jinki comes out, one arm around Taeyeon's shoulders. The noona's eyes are red, and it's obvious she had been crying, but she is wearing such a bright smile it was like staring at the sun.
Key keeps his distance from them, watching Taeyeon ask Jonghyun about the progress of new lyrics, Minho about his college entrance exams, and Taemin about school. It's obvious that everyone is happy to see her, and Key feels another crack at his heart; no matter how much of a mother he was, he would never be the same as a woman.
Taeyeon gives him a shy smile and a wave, which he returns because Jinki was watching. Jinki shooes the other boys away before walking Taeyeon to the door. He doesn't come back for a few moments, and Key knows why.
Love wasn't allowed in this business, and Jinki and Taeyeon knew this the most. But at their tender age, where the heart has more power than the brain, feelings tend to overcome discipline.
If it wasn't for the day Key caught the pair in the dressing room sharing a tender kiss, their secret would never have gotten out.
And that was what it was; a secret. A forbidden relationship between the leaders of the groups, something only Key, other than themselves, knew of.
Key had been so heartbroken that day, in his anger and hurt he had almost stormed to the management and told them about it. He could easily have done so, could still do so.
But the thought of SHINee without its leader, without Jinki holding them together as their foundation made him stop. The thought of Jinki being removed from the company, away from him, made him stop.
And so he keeps the secret. Still keeps it, will keep it forever.
Jinki comes back in, and he is wearing that shy smile of his. Key's heart hurts, really hurts. Hurts even more when Jinki crosses the room over to him and takes one of his hands, whispering.
"I hope you're happy with Jonghyun." Key wants to tell him that Jonghyun is just his best friend, and Jonghyun is secretly in love with Jessica, had always been.
Key wants to cry, wants to scream that he loves Jinki, always did, always will.
But he does not. Instead, he nods numbly, forcing a smile.
"I hope you're happy with Taeyeon too." Key squeezes the hand in his, wishing he could hold on forever. "That will always be our secret." And it will be.
Because one broken heart, even if it was his, was enough.
-------------------------------------------
So basically my brain took a holiday for a few days, and when it came back, my Imagination Fairy beat the living crap out of it and refused to let me write happy fics. So I came up with this. O_____O;
Taeyeon is my favourite from SNSD, hence the pairing (maybe I have a thing for leaders) so yeah. Apologies for the fail. ;__________;
Comments are loved <333
Due to popular demand, I made a sequel, as promised. :D
Pairing: [one-sided] OnKey, Onew/Taeyeon, implied JongKey?
Rating: G
Genre: Angst
Summary: A little white lie changes everything.
Key opens the dorm's door to a petite, brunette girl.
The girl's eyes were sparkling with tears, and for that reason alone, Key resists the impulse to slam the door on her face.
"O-Oh, hi Kibum. Is J-Jinki around?"
Key forces a concerned smile. "Hi, Taeyeon-noona. I'll just go get him--" Key had barely finished the sentence when Jinki appeared behind him, wearing that gentle smile of his.
"Hi, Yeonnie." Taeyeon gave Jinki a relieved smile before turning an embarrassed one to Key.
"Hi, Jinki." Key slowly closed the door as Taeyeon grasps Jinki's outstretched hand and their fingers intertwine. Jinki smiles softly at him before gently leading the petite girl to one of the spare rooms. Key watches the door close with a soft click behind them.
He stands there for a few moments, gripping the doorknob so hard his knuckles turned white.
He tries not to think of what the two were doing behind that closed door. Knowing Jinki, it would be all innocent. But Key can't help himself.
Taemin comes past and sees him still standing there, and asks if someone was outside the door. Key forces a smile and shakes his head, prying his fingers off the cold steel and following Taemin to the kitchen.
He glances one last time at the closed door, trying to ignore his aching heart.
-------------------------------------------
There was a time when he and Jinki were close. And he wanted to believe they still were.
But ever since that day, their blossoming relationship had come to a quick halt.
Key tells himself he shouldn't be selfish. It was unfair of him to think he could have Jinki to himself forever. Jinki was for everyone, and Key was just one of many people who loved him, relied upon him.
Jinki wasn't just an official leader. He was their older brother, the one willing to carry everyone's burden on his back and still smile while doing it. The one who never complained about anything.
This was what had drawn Key to him. That unique trait of his, the fact that Jinki could be so adorable and clumsy yet gentle and strong at the same time.
Key gripped the handle of the kitchen knife tightly; above all things, he wished he could go back to that day and take back everything he'd said.
The day he'd jokingly said he'd been attracted to Jonghyun and even Minho, and since they had teased him so much, he was forced to lie that he wasn't ever going to be attracted to anyone as clumsy as Jinki.
Jinki's face that day was as fresh in his mind as if it had just happened yesterday. The cheerful smile had faltered, before the older boy had laughed along with everyone and smiled that 'Onew' smile of his.
The 'Onew' smile was fake. It was used for fans when Jinki was exhausted or upset and he didn't want people to worry. It was professional, it was plastic.
Key had been receiving it ever since that day. Ever since he told that little white lie since he was too embarrassed to admit his feelings. Feelings he knew were reciprocated.
It was the same feeling as walking through a bridge with Jinki, the other side holding promises of happiness.
Then a little white lie escapes, and suddenly Key finds himself stuck in the middle of the bridge, Jinki going on without him.
And at the end of the bridge stood Taeyeon.
-------------------------------------------
Key should have known Jinki wouldn't wait for him forever. He wanted to tell Jinki that he was being unfair, not even giving him a second chance.
But Key himself knew he wasn't the only reason for Jinki's withdrawal. Having an odd-numbered group would eventually lead to one of them being the odd one out. Ever since the beginning it had been Jonghyun and Key, and somewhere along the way Taemin found a comfortable companion in Minho.
Jinki was by no means alienated; he was everyone's friend, everyone's confidant. But in terms of a 'best friend', Jinki had no one to call his own.
Perhaps it was inevitable that Jinki would turn to Taeyeon as SNSD's leader, and both were the same age.
Both were thrust into the limelight, forced to grow up and mature a lot faster than their years would allow. Both were given the responsibility to carry their respective groups, and both received the most pressure to succeed, more than anyone else.
And yet, both carried their titles with a mixture of pride and humility; neither wanted to be the constant center of attention nor hogged the mic, most of the time allowing their members to outshine them. They seemed dull in comparison, but when given the opportunity, they shone brighter than the stars.
Key hated the fact that Jinki and Taeyeon fit each other perfectly, as if she were the missing piece in Jinki's puzzle, the one that made him complete.
Most of all, Key hated the fact that it could have been him.
-------------------------------------------
Eventually, that closed door opens and Jinki comes out, one arm around Taeyeon's shoulders. The noona's eyes are red, and it's obvious she had been crying, but she is wearing such a bright smile it was like staring at the sun.
Key keeps his distance from them, watching Taeyeon ask Jonghyun about the progress of new lyrics, Minho about his college entrance exams, and Taemin about school. It's obvious that everyone is happy to see her, and Key feels another crack at his heart; no matter how much of a mother he was, he would never be the same as a woman.
Taeyeon gives him a shy smile and a wave, which he returns because Jinki was watching. Jinki shooes the other boys away before walking Taeyeon to the door. He doesn't come back for a few moments, and Key knows why.
Love wasn't allowed in this business, and Jinki and Taeyeon knew this the most. But at their tender age, where the heart has more power than the brain, feelings tend to overcome discipline.
If it wasn't for the day Key caught the pair in the dressing room sharing a tender kiss, their secret would never have gotten out.
And that was what it was; a secret. A forbidden relationship between the leaders of the groups, something only Key, other than themselves, knew of.
Key had been so heartbroken that day, in his anger and hurt he had almost stormed to the management and told them about it. He could easily have done so, could still do so.
But the thought of SHINee without its leader, without Jinki holding them together as their foundation made him stop. The thought of Jinki being removed from the company, away from him, made him stop.
And so he keeps the secret. Still keeps it, will keep it forever.
Jinki comes back in, and he is wearing that shy smile of his. Key's heart hurts, really hurts. Hurts even more when Jinki crosses the room over to him and takes one of his hands, whispering.
"I hope you're happy with Jonghyun." Key wants to tell him that Jonghyun is just his best friend, and Jonghyun is secretly in love with Jessica, had always been.
Key wants to cry, wants to scream that he loves Jinki, always did, always will.
But he does not. Instead, he nods numbly, forcing a smile.
"I hope you're happy with Taeyeon too." Key squeezes the hand in his, wishing he could hold on forever. "That will always be our secret." And it will be.
Because one broken heart, even if it was his, was enough.
-------------------------------------------
So basically my brain took a holiday for a few days, and when it came back, my Imagination Fairy beat the living crap out of it and refused to let me write happy fics. So I came up with this. O_____O;
Taeyeon is my favourite from SNSD, hence the pairing (maybe I have a thing for leaders) so yeah. Apologies for the fail. ;__________;
Comments are loved <333
Due to popular demand, I made a sequel, as promised. :D