It's such a shame that I can't smoke Mary Jane anymore. We get along so well.

I dunno...

Vibes are a funny thing. Sometimes I can't tell if the vibes I feel are ones I'm putting out through paranoia, or if the bad vibes are legit and are thusly making me paranoid.

I dunno...

I really believe in vibes and little things about life that some would consider luck or coincidence. Timely shit always happens to me, giving my life a ( Read more... )

My ex-friend is a goddamn cowardly welder ( Read more... )

Oh my god. I would do some nasty shit right now for a chocolate chip eggo waffel. 

Gin is the only alcohol that makes me incredibly, unavoidably, incomprehensibly, butt-fucking CLUMSY!!! 
Oh yeah, and as for long island ice teas and oxy cotton? They don't mix for very long.

Fuuuuck...
Oh well. At least I got to straighten Garrison's hair...and then some other stuff. That was fun.
And at some point the other night I seem to have ( Read more... )

I hate feeling like I'm playing along with your nonsense. Maybe it feels like that because I am.

I'm boiling this down to our talks about the future: I don't want my children to take the rap just because their parents are never on the same page for longer than a week at a time.

But hey. There's time to grow up, right? 
And hey...I kinda love ya 'n ( Read more... )

It seems as though you have now given me the guts to shut you out the way you shut me out ( Read more... )

So...why do I insist on making my life and past sound so inherently tragic sometimes ( Read more... )

Hi. This post is for Jimmy, Haley, and anyone else who bothered to keep up with our ridiculous fucking lives this year.

Remember that one year where we lived off of drugs and alcohol and somehow managed not to get bored of it all or each other?

Yeah. I've decided that we deserve a fucking parade in our honor for that shit. That took some balls.

And ( Read more... )

My fangs make people cry.
Old people that miss their spouses make me cry. 
Old people miss their fangs and it makes them cry.

Vicious cycle.