Staring at the last ten minutes of "The King of Queens" with a gimlet eye...stonefaced at the stupid, predictable punchlines. I go back a few years to when I worked on the same lot where the show was taped and, on a whim, knifed two of the tires on the four-person golf cart assigned to the show. Seeing the show in syndication now makes me glad ( Read more... )

"Start at the beginning...and when you get to the end, stop ( Read more... )

Somehow I managed to stay up till past four in the morning last night and then get up in plenty of time before my 10 am meeting. I was so thankful to not be sick, though I still didn't feel 100%, naturally. I fortified myself with some orange juice and a hamburger that looked like a leftover Tom Savini creation, thrown up against the back ( Read more... )

My throat is raw after inducing vomiting to clear my head. Got a few rude, childish comments encouraging me to commit suicide, all of which I smiled at. It's funny to see people so intent on being "shocking" that I cannot take their piggish, mean-spirited remarks to heart. Anyone who encourages another to commit suicide is, to me, not someone to ( Read more... )

Pour myself a stronger dose of whiskey, pleased to see there's a lot left in that pint. Of course, on my way back to the bedroom, the door catches on my elbow and I spill some of it. I manage to restrain myself from smashing the glass in my face as "punishment", setting it down and figuring I'll get some aerosol carpet cleaner tomorrow or Friday ( Read more... )

After a day of lethargy, I finished off the remaining Rolling Rock with nary a buzz, so I kipped to the supermarket for a pint of Canadian Club and some Diet Coke. "The last of the liquor", I tell myself ( Read more... )

I lurch back from the liquor store, moaning "Braaaains" like one of those zombies in a Romero film. I always found it sort of funny that they craved human brains, rather than flesh ( Read more... )

Cleaned up the majority of the glass in my fingers, transporting it to the kitchen garbage. Hit my head against one of the cabinets while doing it, with the psychiatrist's comment ("Billy is a good-looking, yet awkward boy") in my head, so I smashed my forehead into the cabinet a few times, screaming "Get it right yet? Get it right?" About to ( Read more... )

Shattered glass all over the floor of my cousin's bedroom. I wiped up some of the liquid from when I poured a full glass of Jack and Diet Coke on the carpet in disgust at my clumsiness...my mind reels back to the psychiatrist who saw me when I was probably seven...I remember seeing the file when I was maybe 11 or 12 years old, which stated that I ( Read more... )

Went into the city this morning for a 10:30 interview. I was fairly confident, maybe more so than the interviewer, who seemed to be searching for questions to ask me from some copied sheet in his hand. Still, they're going to be searching for the next month ( Read more... )