that isn't that bad of a word now is it ? i've begun my exile and it shall last at least a few months 'til the weather turns fair and i can spend time outdoors again looking to nature to nuture and as long as i can go on without the need for someone else to be part of my dark drama the better i am sure after the fiasco with Mary that i will have no ( Read more... )

exile is my future ( Read more... )

gonna try gonna give it my all and go head first and unafraid into this new girl and her heart and hopefully won't get too hurt we'll see but i want to give it all i've got , we're gonna go out on Sunday and try to figure out where we are in each others lives/hearts

well things aren't exactly going as i had hoped , yet i am undaunted and i will again to reach out to the one and true love awating the moment and the time we are right for each other, i have imposed an isolation upom myself to prevent anything from getting in the way of what i seek so i will banish myself from all and will stop seeing the freinds ( Read more... )

WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?? I ask this to myself everyday never knowing what the answer will be , but now that i do have somewhat of a job i will continue to move foreward and hoping to get a second job so that i may purchase a few things 1. a tattoo gun 2. a new guitar 3. a college education , we'll see just how all that goes though till next i get ( Read more... )

well things actually might start looking up for me i got a job ( Read more... )

well i made it even though i thought i might not 31 days sober :) yea but still very sad oh well

Having been clean and sober for 14 days now it's a real change of pace I have only slept about 6 hours in the past 3 and a half days currently I've been up for about 20 hours since I last slept for about 2 hours , maybe the detoxing I'm going through is hitting my system in weird ways nonetheless it's for the best that I do this I want to see what ( Read more... )

Self Made Monster

I am what i've become
I am what i hate
I hate what i am
MONSTER
I bit myself and became rabid
the venom i spit i swallowed
A curse i created and hexed myself
MONSTER
I should be chained and beaten
I want to be lynched
I need to be stopped
monster

didn't do much today just housework ho-hum

every day seems just like the last , effortlessly killing time til another day comes and goes ( Read more... )