Started a diet a few days ago. So sick of hating myself and thinking I'm too fat and ugly to be loved. So far I'm doing pretty good, and I'm hoping my latest motivation sticks around long enough for me to feel super about myself. Once I see a difference, thatll be motivation enough I think ( Read more... )

I did file for re-admission to MSU. I was accepted. I filed FAFSA as an independent. Was rejected due to my current loan situation. I was heartbroken, and devastated, and so sure that things were finally looking up (I was going to GRADUATE!!!) that this damn near killed me. I balled for a bit, then sucked it all inside and let it fester for a while ( Read more... )

I want to stop feeling so terrible. Like I've thrown my life away. I know that I haven't, not really. Maybe my education, but that was... well, it was beyond my means at the time. I couldn't get a cosigner and I couldn't apply for FAFSA as an independent. What was left? I was on the verge of breakdown, and I got the opportunity I'd always wanted ( Read more... )

I've decided that Hallmark holidays, such as "Sweetest Day", "Valentines Day"... etc will heretofore be spent watching zombie movies. Fuck chocolate, and what's so good about being in a relationship anyway?? You can keep that. I'll be single and spend the time preparing for the zombie apocalypse... okay, I realize the ZA is never going to really ( Read more... )

So, I'm dating someone. I use the term very literally--we've been on two official dates now, more rumored on the horizon. He's almost sickeningly sweet, and I actually mean that in a good way. He's really funny, and cute, and almost too good to be true. I'm trying not to like him too much, because let's face it, I don't have the best of luck and ( Read more... )

Today, I'm taking time to reflect on my first year in Florida, on a year of growth and change, of love and friendship. It hasn't always been easy, but in many, many ways, this has been the best year of my life. I'm thankful beyond words to my friends and my family (and the lucky few that fit into both categories!) for all their love and support and ( Read more... )

so I swallowed my fears and gave the cute stranger at work (see previous entry... or 2 before, same thing--the guy who flirts with me) my phone number. That was on Thanksgiving. He hasn't called ( Read more... )

Everyone who knows anything about me knows my memory is pretty much shot ( Read more... )

since my last post, nearly two months ago, the following has happened ( Read more... )

I have a love/hate relationship with money. I always have, and I'm beginning to fear I always will. I need so much, and yet have so little. Always so little ( Read more... )