Oh, how I have missed the wonderful world of el_jay. The digital fiasco of over-emotinalisms and useless surveys ( Read more... )

wow, it's been almost a year since i've been on here. incredible, huh? although so much has happened, i can't even think of where to begin. hmmm, oh well. you all know. and don't pretend like you don't, because you do. hey! i'll actually post something when i'm not in a daze. O.o

i sit here in the utterly annoying computer chair, forcing my hand not to pick up the phone and call him. it's taking everything i have to occupy myself with flowing my feelings through the keyboard instead. i could never explain it fully, but i had to do it, i had to let him go, at least for now. i believe i did the right thing for both of us, but ( Read more... )

oh friday, the glorious end of the stress called the week. the night was seemingly normal, i figured i'd tag along. so, as i stood amidst the swaggering lights and booming speakers, i tried to keep my glance moving around, but it was harder than i expected. i mean, even though it's been a few years, he's still has that something...that incredible ( Read more... )

the more i glanced around the "new" release cd covers streching along the interior of the entertainment section, i realized how much america is like a giant high school with all the usual clicks--a breakfast club syndrome if you will. the transition between so-called genres is inevitable. on the farthest end, the appropiate vibe was complimented ( Read more... )

here is the promised "proper" entry ( Read more... )

ah, the insanity of life. just when i think the summer has reached the calm eye of the storm, the winds of chaos blow once again. every day it is something different. one day, it's the parentals, then the men with the same name, or former best friends, not to mention the after high school education and work. so, since it is almost 3 in the morning ( Read more... )

well it's official. for the first time in almost 2 years, i get to experience the world as a single. paul and i decided that we were in two different places in our relationship....he wanted commitment, and i honestly needed to be free for a while. so, after MONTHS of chaos, depression, heartbreak and crying, we finally decided to split up for a bit ( Read more... )

as i sat on porch this morning, watching the sun slowly create the hazy day of heat particular to alabama summers, my mind still felt as clutered as it did the night before...my head felt like a crumbled piece of paper i am still desperately trying to unfold ( Read more... )

HOLY FRIGGIN GOSH. i have not been on el_jay in FOREVER. my life has been a complete chaotic episode. every day sends me for a an emotional ride of stress, randomness, or both. so many things have been happening, so many different emotions and events. but wow, i am never bored, that's for sure. thank the great God above that summer is finally here ( Read more... )