So,here goes: One day, earlier this week, I was eating a cracker and had the misfortune to begin choking. I sputtered, coughed and gasped for air, feeling certain death was imminent. After what seemed an eternity, I recovered and my face returned to a normal shad of pale. Dennis looked very worried and said asked if I was OK. Kellie, calmly ( Read more... )

At three minutes and four seconds after 2 AM on May 6th of this year, the time

and date will be:

02:03:04 05/06/07.

This will never happen again in our lifetimes.

pretty cool huh?

Keith Richards: `I Snorted My Father ( Read more... )

Forget about those lame icons, you know the ones--------> ;) or :( My life requires more "realistic" icons that more closely mirror my true feelings! Well, how about some "ASSICONS ( Read more... )

It's a BEANIE Fest until Monday!

Yes, so it is my birthday. What did I expect? Precisely 20 minutes into my birthday, I was crying because of someone else's selfishness. Why do I continue to expect a different result? When will I stop having unrealistic expectations of adoration and grandeur on my birthday? I am doomed to disappointment as long as I continue to expect the world to ( Read more... )

Happy Birthday to Kellie Osborne! Hope your birthday is hella crunk! Get psyched for Atlanta!

My grandmother died. Suddenly. I talked to her on the telephone just a few hours before she died. She had just taken a shower and was sitting on her towel on her bed talking to me. She had just eaten a truffle from the box I sent her for Christmas and she sounded like a child as she recounted the truffle's chocolaty goodness. Never mind that she ( Read more... )

So, a burly man from Louisiana threatened to "come up to SC, even to your house if I have to, to git my money".

I thought Louisiana was the "Big Easy"

Guess not. Maybe it's all the mold he's breathing. From Katrina. It has addled his brain.

Fa-la-la-la- fucking-la!

We all know those cute little computer symbols called "emoticons," where ( Read more... )