we talked last nite. sum it up... he loves me but isnt ready 4 a relationship. im numb. wat can i say.

 maybe i shouldnt jump 2 conclusions. he called me. the building hes working on is on hold waitin on permits so he hasnt worked since he got home. in other words he hasnt been up to call me. and he said if he wouldve known he wouldnt of gone bk to ny so soon. dam. so i need to chill. we are goin to talk tho. as soon as i feel btr and im up 2 it. ( Read more... )

so as we all kno j and i have a confusing relationship. dont kno wat we are. well i left him a long ass voicemail after he left telling him what i want and wat i deserve and how i felt about everything. told him we need 2 talk about it cuz i cant do this nemore. yesterday i called him and we talked for a few minutes but not about that. 2day nothing ( Read more... )

so hes gone. we had a nice week. everything was good. sleeping next to him. being wit him. being intimate with him. everything was perfect. we had a few mornings where i would be in the shower and he would come in and use the restroom and we would talk and brush our teeth together. then we would cook breakfast 2gether. all was perfect. now hes gone ( Read more... )

2 FLIPPIN DAYS!!!!!!! IM SO EXCITED! 
JUS IN CASE U DIDNT KNO. I CANT WAIT! YAY ME! YAY HIM. LOL.

O YA AND ITS HALLOWEEN. FAVE DAY OF THE YEAR. XCEPT FOR FRI THE 2ND HAHA. DID I MENTION J WILL BE HOME. HES AS EXCITED AS ME. WHICH MAKES ME FEEL GOOD. IM GOING TO ENJOY HIM BEING HOME FOR 10 DAYS. THEN HE LEAVES ME AGAIN. SIGH. BUT I WILL B XTREMLEY ( Read more... )

3 days to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! omg im so flippin xcited. i have NEVER been this xcitied for nething. ahhhh! im goin crazy waiting. friday 940am ill be at burbank lookin cute waitin for MY jimmy to get off the plane. holy god. life is good.
 

 fire sucks. dam. i cant breathe in this shit. geezus. thank god they are mostly contained. at least the ones around here. ive been coughing like ima smoker. dam crap.

bday was FUN!!!! rico came and it totally made my night. i didnt think he would show up. but he did. we drank and danced and he sang for me. omg. all of my friends love him. we did ( Read more... )

bday party weekend has officially begun. monday ill be the big 30 and we r partying all weekend. oh ya. 

2 wks, 1 hr and 30 min til j comes home!!!!!!!!!! 

so last weekend was fun. halloween horror nites was crazy. i think im gettin btr at being scared tho. the chainsaws scared me. some dude ran me down. lol. i was playin ring around the greg with this guy we were with. i was runnin around him all crazy like. the chainsaw maze was nasty. the one rm with the old woman cookin smelled like decaying flesh ( Read more... )