Lj Idol - 3 Strikes - The axe forgets; the tree remembers

[beautyofgrey]

An entry for Week 4 of therealljidol.

Comments

[viagra]

I have no words. This made me cry. Well done this week.

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you, for reading and for the feedback. It is a difficult topic to write about. ♥

[drippedonpaper]

This made me cry. How did you read my mind? My oldest was born just months before 9/11. And he's neurodivergent.

The years have not gotten easier. I'm so glad your son is back in touch with you.

The parenting really struck me to my heart, but that last bit is an amazing thought that I am still musing over...perhaps in all relationships, we do take turns as the tree and the axe. Maybe there is no way for the tree to not take a turn as an axe handle.

I hurt for you. It's so, so hard. We love them so much, and yet these...there are paths we cannot ...there sometimes feel there are no right answers.

Hugs, hugs. If it ever helps, I am just a message away, on here or FB. You're not alone, I promise. I know you are doing all you can. You are. Good parenting doesn't always show right away (or ever?) The results do NOT reflect on you.

You are a wonderful mom. Hugs.

[beautyofgrey]

I think sometimes that the 9/11 connection is a silly connection to make, but I also can't help but think that the trauma of that event around their birth had some effect - it certainly changed the first weeks and months of their lives, and the world we live in.

I do think that we take turns being the axe with one another - I think that is true for many families/relationships, even those that work really hard to be loving and not dysfunctional (which, still trying here, success TBD!). And yes, part of that is inadvertently harming one another. But one of the other things that came to mind here, too, was that the axe is also a tool - so, how do we use it wisely, i.e., to set boundaries or limitations that might actually keep a relationship healthy?

And thank you. I don't know if I'm a wonderful mom, I've made so many mistakes. But I haven't given up.

[bleodswean]

Beautifully written, the metaphor/analogy works. I'm sorry. Don't give up, don't ever give up. *hugs*

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. I haven't yet, and I'm over 20 years in now, so... we are apparently both very stubborn, if nothing else. Hopefully we'll get there.

[roina_arwen]

This was very enlightening to read, and I like the way you and he are both axe and tree, each in your own ways.

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you.

[engarian]

This was an amazing tale - the jumps from scene to scene make sense and tie the lives of these people together through the difficulties faced by each participant.

- Erulisse (one L)

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. It is non-fiction, but was written with some distance/an eye for privacy, so I'm glad it ties together even without knowing the participants.