Lj Idol - 3 Strikes - The axe forgets; the tree remembers

[beautyofgrey]

An entry for Week 4 of therealljidol.

Comments

[murielle]

Sometimes the battle for existence of mother and child becomes a battle between mother and child. Painful beyond words, crushing, bruising, inexpressable grief. I am a child (no more), my mother sleeps. As painful as my experience was, I now recognize hers was more so.
All we can do is: our best, go on, forgive, and hope. Always hope.
Beautifully written!

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. I'm sorry you had a painful experience with your mother - I wish it were never that way for anyone, I'm trying very hard for it not to be with me. <3

[adoptedwriter]

Heart breaking but tough love is indeed tough. Hugs.

[beautyofgrey]

((Thank you))

[banana_galaxy]

Gosh, there is so much emotion in this. I feel like in other circumstances, this could've been me with one of my kids. I worried about the impact my trauma had on me and how I was with my kids when my trauma impacted me the most. Sometimes the fact my kids have grown into fairly well rounded people feels like pure luck

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. I always felt like parenting was a constant series of decisions while walking through a mine field, part strategy and part luck, and I just happened to have a particularly active mine field to navigate. So yes, it is REALLY hard in the moment at times to know how to navigate, and even if you are following the latest and greatest parenting advice, working with professionals, etc. - it's impossible to know whether or not that is truly doing it right or somehow still mussing it up. I'm trying to remain hopeful.

[banana_galaxy]

I feel that. It makes me think about the comparison of professionals recommending ABA therapy for autistic kids vs autistic adults who went through ABA therapy and came out traumatized. Just because the professionals at a given moment recommend something doesn't necessarily make it the right choice, but how are we, as parents, supposed to differentiate and make decisions when we should be able to trust professionals? So we just do the best we can with the information we have at every given moment.

[marlawentmad]

Oh, this landed deep in my bones. I admire your eloquence. This is a loving tribute to a connection. I particularly loved the piece about boundary setting. That was quite the apt use of metaphor.

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. ♥

[mollywheezy]

So well-written and moving!

[beautyofgrey]

Thank you. ♥