So as things go, nothing much has changed. I have set up to move into an apartment on the 15th of this month. I can honestly say I am not excited about it. I am not looking forward to it really in the least bit. In fact its more depressing. I guess because I really will be alone. At least now I can sit here and hear my family talk. I may not ( Read more... )

I had a few things I wanted to do today to get out of the house. You see, my parents went away on their anniversary trip thing. And I didn't want to just sit here at home. Being here gets to me really bad because its like I can't avoid what all is going on. I came up with a bunch of stuff to do but I don't want to keep going out by myself. ( Read more... )

I had a brand new car for five days.. for 5 days i had more happiness then i have in a long time, because for once I felt like my hopes were paying off, that my praying was making a differance, That my strides to better myself were paying off, but now its done. Ferman took the car back. ANd gave me back the zx2. I stayed very calm about it all till ( Read more... )

So much yet so little has happened lately. I guess the bg news is that I bought a brand new car. Yeah its financed of course but its brand new literally! It really feels like the first break that I have gotten in Lord knows how long. I mean literally I have had some really rough times in the past few months and I guess me being how I am now is ( Read more... )

I don't know how much I can take of being sad. Like I can't think of a day in how knows how long that I haven't cried. And I don't even like to cry I hate it, and I will rarely admit to it, but I just am so upset that its all I can do. And it relly feels like nothing I do ever makes anything better. And I go to work and fake my way through the day ( Read more... )

My back is hurting today, but what is new lol. I cannot wait to be able to sleep on a soft matress again. This sleeping on the couch thing is terrible and it doesn't help that my desk at work won't raise up so I have to lean over the whole day to work. :( Oh well, all things happen for a reason ( Read more... )

I don't know for sure how long it has been since I wrote in here. But I do know that it has been a really long time. A lot has happened in the past nine months, most of which caused me a lot of pain, but I won't even talk about it, because I have grown and learnt from it. I have become a much differant person then I was before. I will not be ( Read more... )

So school starts tomorrow. And where will I be, what will I be doing. Working. ep because I have too pay too much money to go back to USF. It's funny though because I am really upset about it. Like I really want to go back. I want to do well. I want to just prove myself to someone but I don't see it happening. It would take a miracle. I thought I ( Read more... )

Isn't it funny how the world works? Like You put yourslef on the line for people over and over and over agian and keep getting fucked over ebcause of it then you just keep doing it again to be stabbed in the back by more people? It sucks. Then there are always the people to say how much of a friend they are to you, at that point but they never show ( Read more... )

Secrets piss me off, and also I am tired of being left out