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I just almost accidentally texted this to Scuzzy: "If you go to the store today can you get raped..."

Wow I'm SHOCKED there aren't any news stories about kids jumping off bridges today because Obama told them to in his speech.

Jeepers creepers I love water.

I hate talking on the phone. I don't know what it is. Put a potential phone call in my path and I'll run in the other direction. To a far away place that castigates Alexander Graham Bell on a regular basis. It's such an irrational intense dislike. Yet, I live 2500 miles away from my family and for some reason they like totally want to talk to me ( Read more... )

- It's already freakin' October. It's still 100 freakin' degrees here. It's freakin' fall folks. Alliteration is my bitch ( Read more... )

I really wish that Justin Timberlake would stop attempting to bring Sexy back. He needs to realize that Sexy doesn't want to see him anymore. Sexy has left the building. Sexy went to Cold Stone Creamery and made up its own Sexy combination. Sexy hates you Justin Timberlake.

That's all.

This counts as an entry.

I'm going to try to update this for a week straight. Okay who are we fooling, five days straight. Three at best. Two? I'll try. We'll see. No promises ( Read more... )

- We've moved to AZ. We've been here for over a week. Phoenix drivers scare me. We're in close proximity to any restaurant and/or store ever created. I like being able to actually have a pizza delivered to my apartment but I don't like that fact that I have to worry about more crime (more cowbell!). It's a trade-off. Speedy pizza for car theft. It' ( Read more... )

- Every year of my secondary school education involved at least one humiliating experience that could rival the most humiliating experience you can think of. Example, I auditioned for a sixth grade talent show. My talent was lip synching. To Tiffany ( Read more... )