i don't know where it's coming from. this feeling, it's crawling up from the innermost part of my stomach and making its way to the the ducts of my eyes. it spills out  in liquid glass. i hear each drop crash to the floor.

insatiable grief for something i didn't know i had lost.

i thought this time i knew what i wanted. i said to him,  "I'm in love ( Read more... )

im not one for fate but today was my day.
Exhibit A-  i go outside at 6:43 when i know the bus has left my house by 6:42..and somehow the bus is a minute late like me
B- in study hall i finish all of my homework and my day is basically stress free
C- i see a cute boy and he smiles back
D-for lunch i eat stuffed shells which are better than normal
E- the ( Read more... )

everything that is beautiful will someday be soiled ( Read more... )

i didnt take my pill this morning ( Read more... )

what a day of disappointment.

but i didnt crash the car.

thats all that really counts.

well thats all im really counting.
 

i learned i can be manipulative too.

i absolutely hate manipulation.

things are getting confusing and my moods are as inconsistent as the weather.

i really love sean apart of me wants  to be with him but i know it wont work. i know i will leave again. again.

someday things will be clear.

Don't know what you really got.
It's hard to stay and not pretend ( Read more... )

 play the part and make it whole.

the words i want to say only ring out into silent echoes in my mind. there is so much going on i cant get through anything. everything is just a time filler. nothing is good or bad. its just numb, blank, coldness. just apart of this sterile environment. dont touch there is nothing to be felt anyways.
dont bother. its ( Read more... )

you are a true douche bag among douches ( Read more... )

i probably have the most scattered and inconclusive thoughts ever ( Read more... )

 i am forever indebtedly yours
and for what?
nothing.

i was happy to see him.
but i wasn't happy i was happy to see him.