I should know better than to look forward to anything anymore. And now, when all I want to do is escape from my thoughts and life to sleep, I can't... because of the things I did today to make sure I wouldn't be too tired to enjoy tonight. I just don't understand. What is it about me???? Honestly.

Life is so funny to me. I finally have one friend coming back to me - hanging out again, talking more, etc. - but another has taken more steps away... more literally than you might think, not that that situation has felt truly close for a long time. It's like I can't have anyone close to me actually be physically or geographically close to me ( Read more... )

The past few weeks have been so strange, odd, weird,... I could go on and on with words. I am still processing so much of it, yet at the same time, I am trying to enjoy the good aspects of it and trying not to analyze it all too much. I was really afraid a bit ago that I was getting to be too cynical. I still have that edge, but I am doing my best ( Read more... )

Why am I up at 4:30 am on a Saturday morning, you might ask? Because my phone rang at 3:54 and I can't freakin' go back to sleep!!!! Why oh why did my phone ring??? I don't know b/c I was too out of it to answer, but I hit the wrong button so it didn't go to voicemail. Oy vey! I just want to sleep!!!!!

Well, I'm back in T-town. It was definitely an ordeal getting here, but I'm almost settled in now. The apartment is still a disaster, but I'm tackling it little by little. I have a lot to do, but I'm happy with where it is going. Wow, that's a lot of "buts." Anyway, I've got the apartment to myself for a little over a week. Soooo, hit me up. I'll ( Read more... )

I had entirely too much time to think today ( Read more... )

I hate it when I have an amazing weekend or week or insert your own period of time here and the real world comes crashing down on you harder than ever when you do return. It has happened again. Even my body is rebelling against me ( Read more... )

It's the whole hearing things that are never fulfilled that makes me lose faith in people. I am tired of putting myself out there over and over only to get pushed down again and again. Why must caring about people (or trying not to) be so hard? It shouldn't be so difficult for me to drop someone when they never attempt to contact me or follow ( Read more... )

This question was posed to me tonight, and, already being in a less-than-perfect mood, it really got to me. I think the answer that I have for myself is a big part of what bothers me of late. I find myself in so many areas of my life either feeling like I'm treading water or butting my head against the same wall over and over that I get lost in it ( Read more... )

It's just great to find out who really cares about you when you come home for the summer.