Fic: Faults for Fixing, X-men 1st Class, Erik/Charles, NC17/18, Ch3
Title: Faults for Fixing 3 of 4
Author: Beren
Fandom: X-men First Class
Pairing: Erik/Charles
Rating: NC17/18
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Marvel et al. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Warnings: light bondage, movie canon only, timeline AU
Summary: Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.
Author's Notes: See ch 1
Word Count: 25,615
My Fanfic Listings (LJ) | My Fanfic Listings (DreamW)
Links: Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4
Chapter 3 The End of the Beginning
Stealing the blackbird was child's play, because Charles just made most of the personnel forget they were supposed to have a top secret plane in the hanger in the first place. Then they were on their way to the Baltic.
"Yellow," Alex said over the headset as they all made themselves as comfortable as possible, "I can't believe you actually went for yellow, Hank."
"I like it," Raven added and smiled sweetly.
"Exactly," Alex responded, apparently believing that made his point.
"Don't upset the guy flying the plane," Sean pointed out very sensibly and Charles couldn't help smiling.
If felt so much like the time he remembered, but so different as well and he allowed himself the luxury of feeling the hum of the other minds around him. The big difference from last time of course was that Angel and Darwin were with them and it felt much more complete.
Angel was in the co-pilot seat Moira had taken before, having been trained up by Hank in a very short space of time. As it turned out flying seemed to be her thing, whether it was with wings or a plane.
"Right," Charles said, deciding to head off any possible argument, "I think we can leave the discussion about the uniforms until we get back. Hank how long to target?"
"Four hours ten minutes," was the prompt response.
"I know it's probably impossible," he said, looking at the adrenaline flushed faces around him, "but it might be an idea to try and rest on the journey. I'm all too aware none of us got much sleep last night."
The nervous excitement in the house had kept him awake most of the night. Erik had eventually distracted him with sex to stop him pacing the bedroom, after which he had actually managed some sleep, but not a whole lot. The way Erik smiled at him from across the plane he was pretty sure he knew which part of the night his lover was thinking about.
"If anyone wants some help, I can give you a mental suggestion to drop off," he offered.
Everyone looked at everyone else.
"Actually, that might be a good idea, Professor," Sean said, showing much more maturity than his years suggested. "What should I do?"
"Get comfortable," he replied and touched his temple with his fingers while looking past Raven to where Sean was sitting.
Sean shifted in his seat and closed his eyes.
"No fancy flying, Hank," Sean said as he relaxed and then Charles slipped gently into the young mutant's mind.
Placing a light suggestion there he carefully urged Sean's mind to shut down and watched as Sean slowly slipped into sleep.
"Um, that kind of looks like a good plan," Darwin decided shortly after Sean relaxed completely.
It took Charles ten minutes to put everyone out except him, Erik, Angel and Hank as one by one the others decided to skip the journey. Then he was left looking at Erik all the way across the other side of the plane, unable to touch and it was a royal pain.
[The children are going to figure out exactly what we're doing if you keep looking at me like that,] Erik thought directly at him.
[I can't help it,] he replied, [that suit has me thinking all sorts of wicked thoughts.]
[Given how many layers you usually wear, I think I am in the more difficult position,] Erik replied, without batting an eyelid.
[So you like me in leather then?]
Erik made a sound that had Angel turning to look at them.
"I suggested Erik might like to sleep as well," Charles said, hoping that he was covering his reaction to the sound better than he was in his head, "he doesn't seem to agree."
The expression on Angel's face said she didn't quite believe him, but she didn't comment.
[Come into my head, Charles,] Erik sent to him, [we can discuss it.]
A plane was so not the place for it, but Charles was defenceless and he lifted his fingers to his head again. Slipping into Erik's mind was incredibly easy and he didn't step out again until Hank's voice came over the radio and informed him they were then minutes from target.
Charles woke everyone and then reached out his mind to find Emma Frost.
[You're late, he's been in there twenty five minutes already,] was what came back in lieu of a greeting.
[Weather,] he replied, although he was just guessing. [Are you ready?]
[Just give us the coordinates,] Emma replied.
"Hank, position please," he said quickly and Hank immediately rattled of a set of numbers which he relayed to Emma.
Ten seconds later as they were all releasing themselves from their harnesses Azazel and Emma appeared in the centre of the plane.
"Good afternoon, Miss Frost," Charles greeted, now that everyone else could see their guests as well.
"Just so you know," Emma said, looking him directly in the eye, "if you fail, I will tell Shaw you took us all out with a psychic blast."
"Fair enough," he replied, although Erik did not look impressed, "but we are not going to fail. Just so you know, if you double cross us, Hank will blow your submarine into tiny little pieces. Shall we?"
Everyone in the main body of the aircraft joined hands and then Charles reached out to Emma. Her grip was surprisingly firm as she wrapped her fingers around his and then she nodded at Azazel. The blackbird vanished around them and the main control room of the brightly lit sub appeared.
Charles blinked as black spots jumped in his vision; travelling with Azazel was very peculiar.
"You look like someone just hit you over the head with something heavy," Raven said in a whisper.
"I think my mind is still catching up," he replied and looked around.
The interior of the sub was the same as he remembered it, just much neater. Putting his fingers to his forehead he sent Hank the all clear.
"Through there," he said and pointed at the door to Shaw's cabin.
"How did you know that?" Emma demanded, since there were two doors in the main control room.
"Oh," he said with a smile, "I've been here before. The reactor room is behind the end wall. How do we open it from this side?" he asked, looking at Emma.
She seemed disconcerted, which was exactly how he wanted her, because that meant she was less likely to stab them in the back at the first sign of trouble.
"Switch in the metal box on the desk."
"Everyone remember their job?"
He looked at Sean first, who nodded, then at Darwin, Alex, and Raven. Hopefully with the show of force Shaw would just give up, but the others would be good backup if the man decided to fight.
[Remember, Lover,] he sent at Erik, [I will help you anyway I can, all you have to do is tell me.]
Erik did not reply, but led the way into the next room. Charles waked up beside his friend and saw the box Emma had mentioned flip open under Erik's command. He looked at everyone and then nodded at Erik. They were ready and Erik pushed the switch without so much as glancing at it. Charles was impressed with the way the wall just neatly slid open and then he saw Shaw for the first time in close quarters.
Sean opened his mouth the moment Shaw looked up and every mirror in the room beyond shattered under the onslaught. That was their cue to move and as a group they charged into the reactor room.
"Erik," Shaw said, seemingly unbothered, "your brought friends."
"None of us are your friends," Erik all but growled.
Charles could feel Erik's hatred boiling for the surface and it was a wild and uncontrolled thing. Shaw appeared completely relaxed and smiled at Erik's reaction, sneering dismissively and Charles wished he knew what was going on in the man's head. The damn helmet made him completely useless and all he could do was stand there.
"Which one's the telepath?" Shaw asked in a conversational tone.
At that moment Charles wished he had a better poker face because he must have twitched since Shaw's eyes pinned him down instantly.
"Ah, you're much less impressive in person; Emma was quite impressed," Shaw told him. "Of course I know not to judge on physical appearance alone."
"Shut up," Erik all but growled.
"Now, now, Erik," Shaw said and held up a hand, "is that any way to talk to your creator?"
Charles saw the cable that Erik was levitating behind Shaw dip as his friend lost focus.
[Remove the helmet and tell me what you want,] Charles sent at him. [Between rage and serenity, Erik, between rage and serenity.]
One of the beams from the ceiling shuddered above them and everyone looked up nervously. They were still underwater, structural damage would be bad and Erik was losing control. Shaw's smile just grew.
"Why are we fighting?" Shaw asked, looking around at all of them. "We should all be on the same side, we are the same kind."
Erik was one tense knot of fury next to him and Charles put his fingers to his temple; he had to do something.
[Erik, I love you,] he told his lover and sent every warm feeling he could drag up with it. [The helmet.]
Erik stiffened and gasped, but the cable whipped out like a striking cobra and ripped the helmet off. In the split second where it was half off Shaw's head the other mutant realised what was happening and lifted his hand, looking straight at Charles. The next instant Charles knew that Shaw saw him as the only real threat and the man's hand glowed with pure energy. He invaded the man's mind, forcing all Shaw's muscles to freeze, but he also knew it was too late.
Shaw's power lanced towards him and to his shock, Darwin stepped into the path. Darwin adapted instantly, unfortunately not in any way the young mutant seemed to expect. Darwin became a conduit of sorts and Charles had no such defence. As the energy ripped through Darwin it came straight at him and he didn't even have time to try and move out of the way. He wasn't sure what he expected, maybe instant vaporisation, but mainly what it caused was pain.
For a moment he thought he could actually feel his cells trying to explode and he was falling. He could distantly hear Erik's voice shouting for him, both mentally and physically, but his mind seemed to be disconnecting from his body. The pain dimmed and everything seemed far away and dreamlike as all he could do was stare straight ahead.
He felt his hold on Shaw disintegrating and he knew he could not let go. Shaw was still far too dangerous; the man could easily kill every person in the room. As he sensed his grip on reality slipping he had no choice; he did the only thing he could and turned the full force of his mind on the other mutant.
He barely registered hitting the floor as his mind spiralled away from consciousness. There were hands on him, but it was only a vague sensation and slowly the world just went away. The last thing he saw was Erik's frantic face looking down at him and he wished he could touch his lover's mind one more time.
~*~
Waking up was kind of shocking, Charles had been almost positive he had been dying. When he first opened his eyes he didn't realise it because everything was black, but slowly things began to make sense and he could see the world as all sorts of neon edges. He blinked hard again, and finally the real world seemed to fade in and he recognised his room at the mansion.
There was an I.V. set up by the bed and what he recognised as Hank's equipment, but what drew most of his attention was the figure slumped in a nearby arm chair. Eric had a book in his lap where it had clearly fallen and he was snoring very quietly, which made Charles smile in what he was sure was a very silly way.
Alive, at home and with those he loved; he felt strangely content. Of course that didn't explain how he had come to be there or, for that matter, how Hank had managed to keep him alive. He lifted his hand slowly and put it to his temple, letting him mind flow over the mansion to see if he could figure out where everyone was, but the moment he did the presence of their little family seemed to dagger into his brain. If felt like when he had first begun to use Cerebro, before he had learned to regulate the initial contact and he groaned, putting both his hands to his head.
"Charles."
Erik was by his side in a second.
"Are you in pain?"
Charles would have replied, but his mind was still spinning too much for him to form words, so he did his best to look at Erik instead. The world flashed black again, turning Erik's face into harsh lines and he had to blink and force his vision to work properly.
"My god, your eyes," Erik said, voice touched with awe.
"What, what about my..?" It was so hard to get the words out.
"For a moment," Erik said, understanding him anyway, "for a moment they were like looking into blue flame."
The memory of blue flame streaking towards him thought Darwin jumped unbidden into Charles' mind. He could not imagine what it had done to him.
"How ... did you ... save me?" He wanted to ask so much more, but he didn't have the strength for it.
Erik gently brushed the hair away from his face for him.
"We didn't, it's a miracle you're alive," his lover told him in, for what was for Erik, an incredibly gentle tone; "Hank thinks Darwin transformed Shaw's energy burst somehow and then you were able to contain it."
That made a vague kind of sense to Charles. Of course that begged the question what would that much energy have done to him and it was as this idea flicked through his mind that he caught sight of his wrist where his pyjama sleeve had slipped down. For a few seconds all he could do was stare.
"What ..?" He didn't quite know how to express what he was feeling.
Where he usually wore one of his steel cuffs there was metallic grey something, only it wasn't the band, at least not as it had been. Around the edges it looked as if it had melted and fused with his skin and the scroll work looked more like scales than decoration, but the most remarkable thing was when he flexed his wrist, it moved as if it was his own flesh.
"Hank can't explain it," Erik said quietly, "but they're still metal, I can feel that, only they're part of you as well. It was as if you absorbed them."
Charles just stared, bringing his other wrist into easy line of sight.
"All four?" he asked, even though it seemed like a particularly stupid question after he spoke.
Erik nodded.
"When we realised what was happening we managed to get everything else metal off you, but the cuffs were already changing."
If he had had the strength, he would have laughed, because he would have had zippers in very strange places. He couldn't take his eyes off his wrists though, at least for the few more seconds he had the strength to hold them up that was. He had always been different, but he had never looked different. Now he did, even though it was a relatively minor way and he found it was quite a mental adjustment.
"Anything else?" he asked, not sure he really wanted to know.
"Your hair," Erik said and if he had been able, Charles would have moved to check his head.
"What about my hair?" he demanded, although it wasn't really very loud.
Erik didn't say anything for a moment, but Charles saw just a twitch of a smile.
"You have a very attractive electric blue streak, just here," Erik said and helpfully pulled a strand forward for him so he could see it.
Given his wrists and apparently, sometimes, his eyes, it seemed utterly trivial and this time he couldn't stop the laugh. Of course he regretted it instantly as his body objected and he coughed, shaking his whole frame.
"You idiot," Erik said, but very quickly helped him sit up slightly and pressed a glass of water to his lips.
[You were the one that made me laugh,] he projected at Erik and Erik almost dropped the glass.
"No need to shout," Erik said, regaining composure quickly enough.
Charles frowned, but drank the water as Erik helped him; it had only been meant to be the lightest brush of minds.
"How long?" he asked as Erik helped him lay back onto pillows that had miraculously stacked themselves behind him. Finally buying pillow cases with small metal studs in the corners was paying off.
"Six days," Erik replied, checking him over like a bit of a mother hen; "it's four o'clock on Thursday."
It was hard for Charles to imagine what could have laid him up for six whole days.
"And everyone else is okay?" he asked, because it was easier to focus on that rather than himself.
"You mean you haven't already checked?"
"I tried, but it was all too loud, I think I may be a bit over sensitive at the moment."
Erik looked as if he was going to question that, but then just nodded.
"Everyone is fine and we have three extra guests," Erik told him. "I think Emma may take well to teaching."
That was possibly even more shocking than his wrists.
"We're talking about the same Emma," he said, just to make sure, "blond telepath with a fondness for rendering herself transparent?"
For the first time Erik smiled properly.
"She and Raven seem to get on particularly well," Erik told him.
"I think I might try out the coma for a little longer," he joked back.
"Don't you dare," his lover said and mock glared at him, "I am not cut out to look after teenagers and delinquents; that's your job. Now, don't attempt to do anything while I summon Hank. He will want to have a look at you."
"Yes, sir," he said and did his best to mock salute, but his arms felt ridiculously heavy so he only managed it about half way.
Luckily, or perhaps unluckily given Hank's peevishness when he finally woke up a second time, he managed to fall asleep before their resident genius actually arrived.
~*~
It became abundantly clear very quickly that no matter what he wanted, Charles was able to stay awake for short periods, but needed to sleep in between, especially if he remotely tried to use his powers. After the third repeat of this he accepted it and the fourth time he woke up he at least felt a little more alert. He was also incredibly pleased to see Raven perched on the edge of Erik's chair, talking to the man quietly.
"You two look very cosy," he said and smiled as soon as they looked up.
"Charles," Raven said, bouncing to her feet and over to him very quickly, "never worry me like that again."
Then she kissed him on the forehead and made him smile again.
"I will do my best," he promised, although he was well aware it might be difficult to keep. "I like the short shorts."
It looked as if Raven might be picking up clothing habits from Emma, but it was better than naked, which Charles still couldn't deal with. She even smiled at him for the comment.
"How are you feeling?" was Raven's next question as she fussed over him.
"More alert, thank heavens," he said and tried to push himself up a little further on his pillows.
That illustrated instantly that his mind might have been starting to work again, but he was still weak as a kitten. Erik was by his side almost straight away to help him.
"So," he said, once Erik and Raven had him settled again, "what do you think of the blue hair?"
It nicely deflected Raven's worry as she smiled at him. Erik just gave him a look that told him his lover knew exactly what he was doing and went to sit back down again, picking up a newspaper to give him and Raven an illusion of privacy. Charles couldn't help grinning just a little; Erik made a very peculiar mother hen.
"I think it suits you," Raven told him and reached out to touch. "I like it."
"I'm not sure it's going to go with my wardrobe though," he said, enjoying the attention; "you might have to help me with that."
Raven took his hand then and a moment of understanding passed between them that Charles had never really felt before. For the first time they were closer to the same and he couldn't help noticing where Raven's finger lightly touched his wrist, stroking gently.
"Maybe now that you are awake, Erik will stop growling at us all," Raven said and smiled over her shoulder at the other mutant. "Exactly when were you planning on telling me you two were more than friends?"
Charles felt himself blush.
"Um," he wasn't sure how to answer that one.
"Erik is very unsubtle when he's worried, so don't even think about trying to pretend," Raven told him as if she was completely unconcerned by the matter, "besides, I made him admit it on day three of your mental vacation."
He still had no idea what to say.
"Don't look so worried, no one else has caught on," she said, and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead, "and I totally see the appeal and since you're working so hard to accept me, it would be incredibly hypocritical of me to not accept you. Rather explains all the girls you went through in Oxford if you were over compensating, though."
Charles laughed, because it was that or die of mortification. He couldn't help noticing that Erik was studiously pretending not to be listening.
"I'll have you know it had nothing to do with over compensation," he told her even if he did feel like floating away in a bubble of happiness at her words. "I happen to like girls and boys," he lowered his voice, "but girls are much easier and Erik's the only man worth the trouble."
He would have used his telepathy, but he wasn't sure he wouldn't shout it out to the whole house anyway. The way Erik shifted in his chair told Charles that his lover had heard despite his low voice level.
"Just don't mess it up," Raven whispered back and smiled at him.
She then sat back and gave him a critical once over with her eyes. Why he wasn't sure, because she had to have been able to look at him while he was sleeping, but it seemed to satisfy her, so he left her to it, smiling under her scrutiny. Even with his gift almost completely shut down he could tell she had been very worried about him.
"But you haven't asked what happened to Shaw," Raven abruptly changed the subject once she was done checking him over.
"That's because I know what happened to him," he replied, the smile partially slipping off his face.
That was one part of his final moments in that room that he remembered far too clearly. He had known the subject would come up, but he had been hoping for later rather than sooner.
"You sensed that, even while you were in that much pain? Never scream like that again, okay, it was terrifying," Raven said, fluffing his pillows a bit more and giving away just how honest she was being. "Shaw's downstairs, by the way, in a secure room, but Hank says there's virtually no brain activity at all. Hank thinks his power must have fed back on him somehow and wiped his neurons."
"Hank's, wrong," he said before she could continue, "and wow, that's something I don't get to say very often."
He did not really want to talk about Shaw, but he didn't see that he had much choice. If he avoided it now he was not sure he would have the courage to reveal the truth later.
"Charles, what's wrong?" Raven asked, clearly sensing his discomfort. "This is a good thing, Shaw can't hurt anyone anymore."
Charles let his eyes flick over to Erik for a moment and found his lover watching him intently. He took a deep breath and looked Raven in the eye.
"Shaw's power didn't do it," he said, knowing that he was about to change Raven's view of him forever, "I did."
Shock flicked across Raven's face.
"You ... you can do that?"
He had never admitted that to anyone, but he nodded. Raven had always known he was capable of incredible things, but not this kind of destruction. There was a big difference between removing a memory or two and wiping out someone's mind.
"Since when," she asked quietly, squeezing his hand.
"Since I was ten," he replied and knew he would shock her again.
He had explained just about everything about his powers to her, as she had to him. They had grown up and shared their discoveries with each other, but never that.
"We had a dog, a huge thing that didn't like me very much," he decided he had to explain, "and it would always bark at me. I avoided it, but one day I was walking in the grounds and it kept barking and following me. I had a headache where I had been testing my powers and I wanted it to stop, so I lashed out. It never moved or made a sound again and my mother had one of the staff put it out of its misery. I vowed I would never use that ability again, but Shaw was too dangerous to all of you."
He couldn't look either Raven or Erik in the eye.
"That is ..." Erik didn't seem to quite know what to say.
"Horrific, petrifying?" he filled in for his lover.
"I was thinking more of astounding," Erik said and he finally looked up.
For once in his life Charles had no idea at all how to reply.
"You've lived with the knowledge you can ..." Raven trailed off.
"Wipe out another being with a single thought," he finished her sentence for her as well.
"Since you were ten," Raven said in an awed tone.
He gave a derisive little laugh and looked down, playing with the edge of his blanket nervously. That was why he was a little shocked when he found himself engulfed in a very firm hug from Raven.
"Thank you," she said, holding onto him and refusing to let go, "thank you for saving us."
He really wanted to open his mind then, to read what Raven was really thinking. He almost did as well, but he held onto his self control and hugged back instead.
"Food," she said, kind of awkwardly and much too enthusiastically when she finally pulled back, "Hank made us promise to try and get you to eat something before you fall asleep again this time. Try and stay awake and I'll bring you some soup."
Charles did his best to smile at her for that, but he felt rather off balance. When she left the room he finally met Erik's eyes again.
"I have been underestimating you, Charles," Erik said and he felt himself go cold.
He looked away again; he didn't want to be seen as a weapon, never that.
"You are more remarkable than I gave you credit for."
"Of course," he said in a self-depreciating tone, "I can destroy instantly without so much as damaging a hair on a person's head."
Erik did not reply, but walked over to him.
"And you don't," were the quiet words that made him frown. "They say absolute power corrupts absolutely, but it hasn't corrupted you."
He played with his blanket a little more and then finally looked up.
"I'm not a saint," he pointed out.
"You could kill every person who has ever threatened you or what you believe in without anyone knowing it was you, couldn't you?" Erik said.
"Not from here ..."
"If they were within your range," Erik corrected and gave him a glare that told him Erik knew he was deflecting.
It was a fact Charles lived with every day, something he refused to think about, but that hovered at the back of his mind. He had seen into Emma's mind, he knew she was powerful, but she couldn't do what he could. In that he was unique.
"Yes," he said in little more than a whisper.
It was hard admitting the truth and having his greatest secret revealed, but he had had to do it. Shaw was gone forever, he had done what he had sworn never to do, and the others needed to understand quite how dangerous he was.
"You have more self control than any person I have ever met," Erik said and carefully sat down on the bed. "I don't think I would have been as careful with such a powerful defence."
Charles laughed again, probably a little on the hysterical side, because the idea of anyone with that part of his gift scared the hell out of him, no matter how much he trusted them. He could not understand why Erik was not petrified of him.
"I don't think it would be a good idea to make this widely known," Erik said and placed a hand over his.
That made the laughter bubble up even more.
"Charles," Erik said in a very calm, gentle tone, "when you explain what you did to Hank you are going to embellish the truth. I know you will feel the need to tell him what you did, but you will tell him you have never done it before and you could only do it then because of the extreme conditions. Do you understand?"
He tried to calm himself, he honestly did, but he felt like he was about to melt down. The consequences of what he had done were beginning to hit him as he finally let himself think about it.
"Charles," Erik repeated, looking him straight in the eyes.
Finally he nodded.
"Good," Erik told him and then he found himself being gathered into a hug for a second time and he realised he was shaking. "I will explain why the lie is necessary to Raven when she returns. All you have to worry about is finishing your recovery."
Of course it was not that simple, but Charles took the comfort for what it was worth. By the time Raven came back with a tray of soup, bread and tea he almost had a hold of himself and actually formed a smile. He even managed to eat the soup without his hands shaking too much.
~*~
"What do you think you're doing?"
Charles had just about managed to push himself out of bed and into a standing position, but he sat down very rapidly as Raven's loud voice distracted him.
"I was just going to the bathroom before you barged in," he said and gave her a level stare.
"You're not supposed to be out of bed," Raven protested and walked over to him. "Hank says your energy levels are still all over the place and you could hurt yourself."
He suddenly had a longing for the sweet, irresponsible sister who appeared to have been replaced by one who was hell bent on making sure he did exactly as he was told at all times.
"I've be lying in bed for over two days since I woke up," he pointed out, even as he tried to gather enough energy to stand up again.
"Mostly sleeping," Raven pointed out before he could go on.
"I would just like to go to the bathroom by myself," and he knew it came out as a whine, but he couldn't help it.
He hated being virtually helpless.
Raven put her hands on her hips and gave him a very serious look.
"Please," he wasn't above begging.
At that Raven sighed and came over to him.
"I'm helping you," she said and his aversion to that must have shown on his face because she laughed at him. "To the bathroom and back again," she clarified and rolled her eyes, "the rest I do not need to see."
He managed to laugh as well then; he really was off his game at the moment.
"Thank you," he replied and let Raven help him to stand up again.
His strength was returning slowly, but the confrontation with Shaw seemed to have taken a great deal out of him. Everyone of their little family had trouped in and out of his room to say hello since he woke up, but he really wanted to be up and around so he could find out what was going on with the newcomers as well. He did not like being out of the loop.
The trip to the bathroom was uneventful at least and he felt much happier when Raven helped him back into bed.
"So how's everything going today?" he asked as he settled back among his myriad of pillows; he was sure they were breeding, or possibly Erik was sneaking more in every day.
Erik point blank refused to give him all the details of what was going on in the house, so he had to rely on Raven.
"Still a bit us and them," Raven told him with a smile, "but no one's tried to kill anyone else this morning which is good. Emma offered to take me and Angel shopping if we wanted to go, which is what I was coming up here to ask you about."
The idea of letting Raven out of the safety of the mansion, especially with Emma Frost made him want to instantly say no, but he held himself in check. Raven was perfectly capable of taking care of herself and she clearly trusted Emma. Since they had left Moira behind with the rest of the CIA, Raven had had no older female company and she had definitely taken a shine to Emma.
"Just don't bankrupt us," he said and conjured up a smile.
Raven squealed and clapped her hands before giving him a hug.
"We'll go after lunch," she said, bouncing happily, "did you need anything?"
He shook his head.
"No thank you, you just have a good time."
Raven beamed at him, which made him incredibly happy because there seemed to be no residual discomfort from his confession about Shaw. It had been a little awkward all that evening, but since, Raven seemed to have adjusted to the new information. When he had told Hank, their young genius had started making theories about what the energy surge could have done to Charles' brain in that instant to make it possible and hadn't even seemed to register the whole dangerous part.
"While you're here," he said, pushing his thoughts onto other things, "would you mind if I, ah, practised a little on you," and he waved his fingers in the general direction of his temple. "I wouldn't go deep or anything, it's just I seem to have turned up the volume somehow and I think I need to recalibrate."
"Turned up the volume?" Raven asked and went from happy to worried.
"When I open my mind everything's a lot clearer and louder," he did his best to explain, "and the one time I tried to speak to Erik he seemed to think I was shouting at him. I think I might have had to push so hard with Shaw that my levels are a bit skewed."
"You're sure it's not to do with the whole eye thing?"
They hadn't really discussed the new additions to his mutation, but he had had to explain what had happened to Hank, so he had done the same with Raven.
"I don't see how," he said, "I don't feel any different when it happens, I just see things in a different way."
Exactly what the transmuted energy had done to him was a mystery and they were waiting until after he was recovered to dig deeper, but he was almost sure it had done little to his telepathy.
"Okay," Raven said, apparently satisfied, "but no digging around for personal information and no pushing yourself too hard."
Charles grinned and placed his hand over his heart.
"Word of honour," he said and lifted his fingers to his temple. [How's this?]
Raven winced just a little.
[You are shouting,] she replied and he winced in return.
This was going to take some practice.
On to Ch 4
Author: Beren
Fandom: X-men First Class
Pairing: Erik/Charles
Rating: NC17/18
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Marvel et al. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Warnings: light bondage, movie canon only, timeline AU
Summary: Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.
Author's Notes: See ch 1
Word Count: 25,615
My Fanfic Listings (LJ) | My Fanfic Listings (DreamW)
Links: Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4
Chapter 3 The End of the Beginning
Stealing the blackbird was child's play, because Charles just made most of the personnel forget they were supposed to have a top secret plane in the hanger in the first place. Then they were on their way to the Baltic.
"Yellow," Alex said over the headset as they all made themselves as comfortable as possible, "I can't believe you actually went for yellow, Hank."
"I like it," Raven added and smiled sweetly.
"Exactly," Alex responded, apparently believing that made his point.
"Don't upset the guy flying the plane," Sean pointed out very sensibly and Charles couldn't help smiling.
If felt so much like the time he remembered, but so different as well and he allowed himself the luxury of feeling the hum of the other minds around him. The big difference from last time of course was that Angel and Darwin were with them and it felt much more complete.
Angel was in the co-pilot seat Moira had taken before, having been trained up by Hank in a very short space of time. As it turned out flying seemed to be her thing, whether it was with wings or a plane.
"Right," Charles said, deciding to head off any possible argument, "I think we can leave the discussion about the uniforms until we get back. Hank how long to target?"
"Four hours ten minutes," was the prompt response.
"I know it's probably impossible," he said, looking at the adrenaline flushed faces around him, "but it might be an idea to try and rest on the journey. I'm all too aware none of us got much sleep last night."
The nervous excitement in the house had kept him awake most of the night. Erik had eventually distracted him with sex to stop him pacing the bedroom, after which he had actually managed some sleep, but not a whole lot. The way Erik smiled at him from across the plane he was pretty sure he knew which part of the night his lover was thinking about.
"If anyone wants some help, I can give you a mental suggestion to drop off," he offered.
Everyone looked at everyone else.
"Actually, that might be a good idea, Professor," Sean said, showing much more maturity than his years suggested. "What should I do?"
"Get comfortable," he replied and touched his temple with his fingers while looking past Raven to where Sean was sitting.
Sean shifted in his seat and closed his eyes.
"No fancy flying, Hank," Sean said as he relaxed and then Charles slipped gently into the young mutant's mind.
Placing a light suggestion there he carefully urged Sean's mind to shut down and watched as Sean slowly slipped into sleep.
"Um, that kind of looks like a good plan," Darwin decided shortly after Sean relaxed completely.
It took Charles ten minutes to put everyone out except him, Erik, Angel and Hank as one by one the others decided to skip the journey. Then he was left looking at Erik all the way across the other side of the plane, unable to touch and it was a royal pain.
[The children are going to figure out exactly what we're doing if you keep looking at me like that,] Erik thought directly at him.
[I can't help it,] he replied, [that suit has me thinking all sorts of wicked thoughts.]
[Given how many layers you usually wear, I think I am in the more difficult position,] Erik replied, without batting an eyelid.
[So you like me in leather then?]
Erik made a sound that had Angel turning to look at them.
"I suggested Erik might like to sleep as well," Charles said, hoping that he was covering his reaction to the sound better than he was in his head, "he doesn't seem to agree."
The expression on Angel's face said she didn't quite believe him, but she didn't comment.
[Come into my head, Charles,] Erik sent to him, [we can discuss it.]
A plane was so not the place for it, but Charles was defenceless and he lifted his fingers to his head again. Slipping into Erik's mind was incredibly easy and he didn't step out again until Hank's voice came over the radio and informed him they were then minutes from target.
Charles woke everyone and then reached out his mind to find Emma Frost.
[You're late, he's been in there twenty five minutes already,] was what came back in lieu of a greeting.
[Weather,] he replied, although he was just guessing. [Are you ready?]
[Just give us the coordinates,] Emma replied.
"Hank, position please," he said quickly and Hank immediately rattled of a set of numbers which he relayed to Emma.
Ten seconds later as they were all releasing themselves from their harnesses Azazel and Emma appeared in the centre of the plane.
"Good afternoon, Miss Frost," Charles greeted, now that everyone else could see their guests as well.
"Just so you know," Emma said, looking him directly in the eye, "if you fail, I will tell Shaw you took us all out with a psychic blast."
"Fair enough," he replied, although Erik did not look impressed, "but we are not going to fail. Just so you know, if you double cross us, Hank will blow your submarine into tiny little pieces. Shall we?"
Everyone in the main body of the aircraft joined hands and then Charles reached out to Emma. Her grip was surprisingly firm as she wrapped her fingers around his and then she nodded at Azazel. The blackbird vanished around them and the main control room of the brightly lit sub appeared.
Charles blinked as black spots jumped in his vision; travelling with Azazel was very peculiar.
"You look like someone just hit you over the head with something heavy," Raven said in a whisper.
"I think my mind is still catching up," he replied and looked around.
The interior of the sub was the same as he remembered it, just much neater. Putting his fingers to his forehead he sent Hank the all clear.
"Through there," he said and pointed at the door to Shaw's cabin.
"How did you know that?" Emma demanded, since there were two doors in the main control room.
"Oh," he said with a smile, "I've been here before. The reactor room is behind the end wall. How do we open it from this side?" he asked, looking at Emma.
She seemed disconcerted, which was exactly how he wanted her, because that meant she was less likely to stab them in the back at the first sign of trouble.
"Switch in the metal box on the desk."
"Everyone remember their job?"
He looked at Sean first, who nodded, then at Darwin, Alex, and Raven. Hopefully with the show of force Shaw would just give up, but the others would be good backup if the man decided to fight.
[Remember, Lover,] he sent at Erik, [I will help you anyway I can, all you have to do is tell me.]
Erik did not reply, but led the way into the next room. Charles waked up beside his friend and saw the box Emma had mentioned flip open under Erik's command. He looked at everyone and then nodded at Erik. They were ready and Erik pushed the switch without so much as glancing at it. Charles was impressed with the way the wall just neatly slid open and then he saw Shaw for the first time in close quarters.
Sean opened his mouth the moment Shaw looked up and every mirror in the room beyond shattered under the onslaught. That was their cue to move and as a group they charged into the reactor room.
"Erik," Shaw said, seemingly unbothered, "your brought friends."
"None of us are your friends," Erik all but growled.
Charles could feel Erik's hatred boiling for the surface and it was a wild and uncontrolled thing. Shaw appeared completely relaxed and smiled at Erik's reaction, sneering dismissively and Charles wished he knew what was going on in the man's head. The damn helmet made him completely useless and all he could do was stand there.
"Which one's the telepath?" Shaw asked in a conversational tone.
At that moment Charles wished he had a better poker face because he must have twitched since Shaw's eyes pinned him down instantly.
"Ah, you're much less impressive in person; Emma was quite impressed," Shaw told him. "Of course I know not to judge on physical appearance alone."
"Shut up," Erik all but growled.
"Now, now, Erik," Shaw said and held up a hand, "is that any way to talk to your creator?"
Charles saw the cable that Erik was levitating behind Shaw dip as his friend lost focus.
[Remove the helmet and tell me what you want,] Charles sent at him. [Between rage and serenity, Erik, between rage and serenity.]
One of the beams from the ceiling shuddered above them and everyone looked up nervously. They were still underwater, structural damage would be bad and Erik was losing control. Shaw's smile just grew.
"Why are we fighting?" Shaw asked, looking around at all of them. "We should all be on the same side, we are the same kind."
Erik was one tense knot of fury next to him and Charles put his fingers to his temple; he had to do something.
[Erik, I love you,] he told his lover and sent every warm feeling he could drag up with it. [The helmet.]
Erik stiffened and gasped, but the cable whipped out like a striking cobra and ripped the helmet off. In the split second where it was half off Shaw's head the other mutant realised what was happening and lifted his hand, looking straight at Charles. The next instant Charles knew that Shaw saw him as the only real threat and the man's hand glowed with pure energy. He invaded the man's mind, forcing all Shaw's muscles to freeze, but he also knew it was too late.
Shaw's power lanced towards him and to his shock, Darwin stepped into the path. Darwin adapted instantly, unfortunately not in any way the young mutant seemed to expect. Darwin became a conduit of sorts and Charles had no such defence. As the energy ripped through Darwin it came straight at him and he didn't even have time to try and move out of the way. He wasn't sure what he expected, maybe instant vaporisation, but mainly what it caused was pain.
For a moment he thought he could actually feel his cells trying to explode and he was falling. He could distantly hear Erik's voice shouting for him, both mentally and physically, but his mind seemed to be disconnecting from his body. The pain dimmed and everything seemed far away and dreamlike as all he could do was stare straight ahead.
He felt his hold on Shaw disintegrating and he knew he could not let go. Shaw was still far too dangerous; the man could easily kill every person in the room. As he sensed his grip on reality slipping he had no choice; he did the only thing he could and turned the full force of his mind on the other mutant.
He barely registered hitting the floor as his mind spiralled away from consciousness. There were hands on him, but it was only a vague sensation and slowly the world just went away. The last thing he saw was Erik's frantic face looking down at him and he wished he could touch his lover's mind one more time.
~*~
Waking up was kind of shocking, Charles had been almost positive he had been dying. When he first opened his eyes he didn't realise it because everything was black, but slowly things began to make sense and he could see the world as all sorts of neon edges. He blinked hard again, and finally the real world seemed to fade in and he recognised his room at the mansion.
There was an I.V. set up by the bed and what he recognised as Hank's equipment, but what drew most of his attention was the figure slumped in a nearby arm chair. Eric had a book in his lap where it had clearly fallen and he was snoring very quietly, which made Charles smile in what he was sure was a very silly way.
Alive, at home and with those he loved; he felt strangely content. Of course that didn't explain how he had come to be there or, for that matter, how Hank had managed to keep him alive. He lifted his hand slowly and put it to his temple, letting him mind flow over the mansion to see if he could figure out where everyone was, but the moment he did the presence of their little family seemed to dagger into his brain. If felt like when he had first begun to use Cerebro, before he had learned to regulate the initial contact and he groaned, putting both his hands to his head.
"Charles."
Erik was by his side in a second.
"Are you in pain?"
Charles would have replied, but his mind was still spinning too much for him to form words, so he did his best to look at Erik instead. The world flashed black again, turning Erik's face into harsh lines and he had to blink and force his vision to work properly.
"My god, your eyes," Erik said, voice touched with awe.
"What, what about my..?" It was so hard to get the words out.
"For a moment," Erik said, understanding him anyway, "for a moment they were like looking into blue flame."
The memory of blue flame streaking towards him thought Darwin jumped unbidden into Charles' mind. He could not imagine what it had done to him.
"How ... did you ... save me?" He wanted to ask so much more, but he didn't have the strength for it.
Erik gently brushed the hair away from his face for him.
"We didn't, it's a miracle you're alive," his lover told him in, for what was for Erik, an incredibly gentle tone; "Hank thinks Darwin transformed Shaw's energy burst somehow and then you were able to contain it."
That made a vague kind of sense to Charles. Of course that begged the question what would that much energy have done to him and it was as this idea flicked through his mind that he caught sight of his wrist where his pyjama sleeve had slipped down. For a few seconds all he could do was stare.
"What ..?" He didn't quite know how to express what he was feeling.
Where he usually wore one of his steel cuffs there was metallic grey something, only it wasn't the band, at least not as it had been. Around the edges it looked as if it had melted and fused with his skin and the scroll work looked more like scales than decoration, but the most remarkable thing was when he flexed his wrist, it moved as if it was his own flesh.
"Hank can't explain it," Erik said quietly, "but they're still metal, I can feel that, only they're part of you as well. It was as if you absorbed them."
Charles just stared, bringing his other wrist into easy line of sight.
"All four?" he asked, even though it seemed like a particularly stupid question after he spoke.
Erik nodded.
"When we realised what was happening we managed to get everything else metal off you, but the cuffs were already changing."
If he had had the strength, he would have laughed, because he would have had zippers in very strange places. He couldn't take his eyes off his wrists though, at least for the few more seconds he had the strength to hold them up that was. He had always been different, but he had never looked different. Now he did, even though it was a relatively minor way and he found it was quite a mental adjustment.
"Anything else?" he asked, not sure he really wanted to know.
"Your hair," Erik said and if he had been able, Charles would have moved to check his head.
"What about my hair?" he demanded, although it wasn't really very loud.
Erik didn't say anything for a moment, but Charles saw just a twitch of a smile.
"You have a very attractive electric blue streak, just here," Erik said and helpfully pulled a strand forward for him so he could see it.
Given his wrists and apparently, sometimes, his eyes, it seemed utterly trivial and this time he couldn't stop the laugh. Of course he regretted it instantly as his body objected and he coughed, shaking his whole frame.
"You idiot," Erik said, but very quickly helped him sit up slightly and pressed a glass of water to his lips.
[You were the one that made me laugh,] he projected at Erik and Erik almost dropped the glass.
"No need to shout," Erik said, regaining composure quickly enough.
Charles frowned, but drank the water as Erik helped him; it had only been meant to be the lightest brush of minds.
"How long?" he asked as Erik helped him lay back onto pillows that had miraculously stacked themselves behind him. Finally buying pillow cases with small metal studs in the corners was paying off.
"Six days," Erik replied, checking him over like a bit of a mother hen; "it's four o'clock on Thursday."
It was hard for Charles to imagine what could have laid him up for six whole days.
"And everyone else is okay?" he asked, because it was easier to focus on that rather than himself.
"You mean you haven't already checked?"
"I tried, but it was all too loud, I think I may be a bit over sensitive at the moment."
Erik looked as if he was going to question that, but then just nodded.
"Everyone is fine and we have three extra guests," Erik told him. "I think Emma may take well to teaching."
That was possibly even more shocking than his wrists.
"We're talking about the same Emma," he said, just to make sure, "blond telepath with a fondness for rendering herself transparent?"
For the first time Erik smiled properly.
"She and Raven seem to get on particularly well," Erik told him.
"I think I might try out the coma for a little longer," he joked back.
"Don't you dare," his lover said and mock glared at him, "I am not cut out to look after teenagers and delinquents; that's your job. Now, don't attempt to do anything while I summon Hank. He will want to have a look at you."
"Yes, sir," he said and did his best to mock salute, but his arms felt ridiculously heavy so he only managed it about half way.
Luckily, or perhaps unluckily given Hank's peevishness when he finally woke up a second time, he managed to fall asleep before their resident genius actually arrived.
~*~
It became abundantly clear very quickly that no matter what he wanted, Charles was able to stay awake for short periods, but needed to sleep in between, especially if he remotely tried to use his powers. After the third repeat of this he accepted it and the fourth time he woke up he at least felt a little more alert. He was also incredibly pleased to see Raven perched on the edge of Erik's chair, talking to the man quietly.
"You two look very cosy," he said and smiled as soon as they looked up.
"Charles," Raven said, bouncing to her feet and over to him very quickly, "never worry me like that again."
Then she kissed him on the forehead and made him smile again.
"I will do my best," he promised, although he was well aware it might be difficult to keep. "I like the short shorts."
It looked as if Raven might be picking up clothing habits from Emma, but it was better than naked, which Charles still couldn't deal with. She even smiled at him for the comment.
"How are you feeling?" was Raven's next question as she fussed over him.
"More alert, thank heavens," he said and tried to push himself up a little further on his pillows.
That illustrated instantly that his mind might have been starting to work again, but he was still weak as a kitten. Erik was by his side almost straight away to help him.
"So," he said, once Erik and Raven had him settled again, "what do you think of the blue hair?"
It nicely deflected Raven's worry as she smiled at him. Erik just gave him a look that told him his lover knew exactly what he was doing and went to sit back down again, picking up a newspaper to give him and Raven an illusion of privacy. Charles couldn't help grinning just a little; Erik made a very peculiar mother hen.
"I think it suits you," Raven told him and reached out to touch. "I like it."
"I'm not sure it's going to go with my wardrobe though," he said, enjoying the attention; "you might have to help me with that."
Raven took his hand then and a moment of understanding passed between them that Charles had never really felt before. For the first time they were closer to the same and he couldn't help noticing where Raven's finger lightly touched his wrist, stroking gently.
"Maybe now that you are awake, Erik will stop growling at us all," Raven said and smiled over her shoulder at the other mutant. "Exactly when were you planning on telling me you two were more than friends?"
Charles felt himself blush.
"Um," he wasn't sure how to answer that one.
"Erik is very unsubtle when he's worried, so don't even think about trying to pretend," Raven told him as if she was completely unconcerned by the matter, "besides, I made him admit it on day three of your mental vacation."
He still had no idea what to say.
"Don't look so worried, no one else has caught on," she said, and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead, "and I totally see the appeal and since you're working so hard to accept me, it would be incredibly hypocritical of me to not accept you. Rather explains all the girls you went through in Oxford if you were over compensating, though."
Charles laughed, because it was that or die of mortification. He couldn't help noticing that Erik was studiously pretending not to be listening.
"I'll have you know it had nothing to do with over compensation," he told her even if he did feel like floating away in a bubble of happiness at her words. "I happen to like girls and boys," he lowered his voice, "but girls are much easier and Erik's the only man worth the trouble."
He would have used his telepathy, but he wasn't sure he wouldn't shout it out to the whole house anyway. The way Erik shifted in his chair told Charles that his lover had heard despite his low voice level.
"Just don't mess it up," Raven whispered back and smiled at him.
She then sat back and gave him a critical once over with her eyes. Why he wasn't sure, because she had to have been able to look at him while he was sleeping, but it seemed to satisfy her, so he left her to it, smiling under her scrutiny. Even with his gift almost completely shut down he could tell she had been very worried about him.
"But you haven't asked what happened to Shaw," Raven abruptly changed the subject once she was done checking him over.
"That's because I know what happened to him," he replied, the smile partially slipping off his face.
That was one part of his final moments in that room that he remembered far too clearly. He had known the subject would come up, but he had been hoping for later rather than sooner.
"You sensed that, even while you were in that much pain? Never scream like that again, okay, it was terrifying," Raven said, fluffing his pillows a bit more and giving away just how honest she was being. "Shaw's downstairs, by the way, in a secure room, but Hank says there's virtually no brain activity at all. Hank thinks his power must have fed back on him somehow and wiped his neurons."
"Hank's, wrong," he said before she could continue, "and wow, that's something I don't get to say very often."
He did not really want to talk about Shaw, but he didn't see that he had much choice. If he avoided it now he was not sure he would have the courage to reveal the truth later.
"Charles, what's wrong?" Raven asked, clearly sensing his discomfort. "This is a good thing, Shaw can't hurt anyone anymore."
Charles let his eyes flick over to Erik for a moment and found his lover watching him intently. He took a deep breath and looked Raven in the eye.
"Shaw's power didn't do it," he said, knowing that he was about to change Raven's view of him forever, "I did."
Shock flicked across Raven's face.
"You ... you can do that?"
He had never admitted that to anyone, but he nodded. Raven had always known he was capable of incredible things, but not this kind of destruction. There was a big difference between removing a memory or two and wiping out someone's mind.
"Since when," she asked quietly, squeezing his hand.
"Since I was ten," he replied and knew he would shock her again.
He had explained just about everything about his powers to her, as she had to him. They had grown up and shared their discoveries with each other, but never that.
"We had a dog, a huge thing that didn't like me very much," he decided he had to explain, "and it would always bark at me. I avoided it, but one day I was walking in the grounds and it kept barking and following me. I had a headache where I had been testing my powers and I wanted it to stop, so I lashed out. It never moved or made a sound again and my mother had one of the staff put it out of its misery. I vowed I would never use that ability again, but Shaw was too dangerous to all of you."
He couldn't look either Raven or Erik in the eye.
"That is ..." Erik didn't seem to quite know what to say.
"Horrific, petrifying?" he filled in for his lover.
"I was thinking more of astounding," Erik said and he finally looked up.
For once in his life Charles had no idea at all how to reply.
"You've lived with the knowledge you can ..." Raven trailed off.
"Wipe out another being with a single thought," he finished her sentence for her as well.
"Since you were ten," Raven said in an awed tone.
He gave a derisive little laugh and looked down, playing with the edge of his blanket nervously. That was why he was a little shocked when he found himself engulfed in a very firm hug from Raven.
"Thank you," she said, holding onto him and refusing to let go, "thank you for saving us."
He really wanted to open his mind then, to read what Raven was really thinking. He almost did as well, but he held onto his self control and hugged back instead.
"Food," she said, kind of awkwardly and much too enthusiastically when she finally pulled back, "Hank made us promise to try and get you to eat something before you fall asleep again this time. Try and stay awake and I'll bring you some soup."
Charles did his best to smile at her for that, but he felt rather off balance. When she left the room he finally met Erik's eyes again.
"I have been underestimating you, Charles," Erik said and he felt himself go cold.
He looked away again; he didn't want to be seen as a weapon, never that.
"You are more remarkable than I gave you credit for."
"Of course," he said in a self-depreciating tone, "I can destroy instantly without so much as damaging a hair on a person's head."
Erik did not reply, but walked over to him.
"And you don't," were the quiet words that made him frown. "They say absolute power corrupts absolutely, but it hasn't corrupted you."
He played with his blanket a little more and then finally looked up.
"I'm not a saint," he pointed out.
"You could kill every person who has ever threatened you or what you believe in without anyone knowing it was you, couldn't you?" Erik said.
"Not from here ..."
"If they were within your range," Erik corrected and gave him a glare that told him Erik knew he was deflecting.
It was a fact Charles lived with every day, something he refused to think about, but that hovered at the back of his mind. He had seen into Emma's mind, he knew she was powerful, but she couldn't do what he could. In that he was unique.
"Yes," he said in little more than a whisper.
It was hard admitting the truth and having his greatest secret revealed, but he had had to do it. Shaw was gone forever, he had done what he had sworn never to do, and the others needed to understand quite how dangerous he was.
"You have more self control than any person I have ever met," Erik said and carefully sat down on the bed. "I don't think I would have been as careful with such a powerful defence."
Charles laughed again, probably a little on the hysterical side, because the idea of anyone with that part of his gift scared the hell out of him, no matter how much he trusted them. He could not understand why Erik was not petrified of him.
"I don't think it would be a good idea to make this widely known," Erik said and placed a hand over his.
That made the laughter bubble up even more.
"Charles," Erik said in a very calm, gentle tone, "when you explain what you did to Hank you are going to embellish the truth. I know you will feel the need to tell him what you did, but you will tell him you have never done it before and you could only do it then because of the extreme conditions. Do you understand?"
He tried to calm himself, he honestly did, but he felt like he was about to melt down. The consequences of what he had done were beginning to hit him as he finally let himself think about it.
"Charles," Erik repeated, looking him straight in the eyes.
Finally he nodded.
"Good," Erik told him and then he found himself being gathered into a hug for a second time and he realised he was shaking. "I will explain why the lie is necessary to Raven when she returns. All you have to worry about is finishing your recovery."
Of course it was not that simple, but Charles took the comfort for what it was worth. By the time Raven came back with a tray of soup, bread and tea he almost had a hold of himself and actually formed a smile. He even managed to eat the soup without his hands shaking too much.
~*~
"What do you think you're doing?"
Charles had just about managed to push himself out of bed and into a standing position, but he sat down very rapidly as Raven's loud voice distracted him.
"I was just going to the bathroom before you barged in," he said and gave her a level stare.
"You're not supposed to be out of bed," Raven protested and walked over to him. "Hank says your energy levels are still all over the place and you could hurt yourself."
He suddenly had a longing for the sweet, irresponsible sister who appeared to have been replaced by one who was hell bent on making sure he did exactly as he was told at all times.
"I've be lying in bed for over two days since I woke up," he pointed out, even as he tried to gather enough energy to stand up again.
"Mostly sleeping," Raven pointed out before he could go on.
"I would just like to go to the bathroom by myself," and he knew it came out as a whine, but he couldn't help it.
He hated being virtually helpless.
Raven put her hands on her hips and gave him a very serious look.
"Please," he wasn't above begging.
At that Raven sighed and came over to him.
"I'm helping you," she said and his aversion to that must have shown on his face because she laughed at him. "To the bathroom and back again," she clarified and rolled her eyes, "the rest I do not need to see."
He managed to laugh as well then; he really was off his game at the moment.
"Thank you," he replied and let Raven help him to stand up again.
His strength was returning slowly, but the confrontation with Shaw seemed to have taken a great deal out of him. Everyone of their little family had trouped in and out of his room to say hello since he woke up, but he really wanted to be up and around so he could find out what was going on with the newcomers as well. He did not like being out of the loop.
The trip to the bathroom was uneventful at least and he felt much happier when Raven helped him back into bed.
"So how's everything going today?" he asked as he settled back among his myriad of pillows; he was sure they were breeding, or possibly Erik was sneaking more in every day.
Erik point blank refused to give him all the details of what was going on in the house, so he had to rely on Raven.
"Still a bit us and them," Raven told him with a smile, "but no one's tried to kill anyone else this morning which is good. Emma offered to take me and Angel shopping if we wanted to go, which is what I was coming up here to ask you about."
The idea of letting Raven out of the safety of the mansion, especially with Emma Frost made him want to instantly say no, but he held himself in check. Raven was perfectly capable of taking care of herself and she clearly trusted Emma. Since they had left Moira behind with the rest of the CIA, Raven had had no older female company and she had definitely taken a shine to Emma.
"Just don't bankrupt us," he said and conjured up a smile.
Raven squealed and clapped her hands before giving him a hug.
"We'll go after lunch," she said, bouncing happily, "did you need anything?"
He shook his head.
"No thank you, you just have a good time."
Raven beamed at him, which made him incredibly happy because there seemed to be no residual discomfort from his confession about Shaw. It had been a little awkward all that evening, but since, Raven seemed to have adjusted to the new information. When he had told Hank, their young genius had started making theories about what the energy surge could have done to Charles' brain in that instant to make it possible and hadn't even seemed to register the whole dangerous part.
"While you're here," he said, pushing his thoughts onto other things, "would you mind if I, ah, practised a little on you," and he waved his fingers in the general direction of his temple. "I wouldn't go deep or anything, it's just I seem to have turned up the volume somehow and I think I need to recalibrate."
"Turned up the volume?" Raven asked and went from happy to worried.
"When I open my mind everything's a lot clearer and louder," he did his best to explain, "and the one time I tried to speak to Erik he seemed to think I was shouting at him. I think I might have had to push so hard with Shaw that my levels are a bit skewed."
"You're sure it's not to do with the whole eye thing?"
They hadn't really discussed the new additions to his mutation, but he had had to explain what had happened to Hank, so he had done the same with Raven.
"I don't see how," he said, "I don't feel any different when it happens, I just see things in a different way."
Exactly what the transmuted energy had done to him was a mystery and they were waiting until after he was recovered to dig deeper, but he was almost sure it had done little to his telepathy.
"Okay," Raven said, apparently satisfied, "but no digging around for personal information and no pushing yourself too hard."
Charles grinned and placed his hand over his heart.
"Word of honour," he said and lifted his fingers to his temple. [How's this?]
Raven winced just a little.
[You are shouting,] she replied and he winced in return.
This was going to take some practice.
On to Ch 4