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so after this last final breakdown that ended mine and tyler's relationship, its been a rough recovery. like this happend the 4th and I've barely made it out of bed and havent gone more than a few hours without breaking down into tears. which sucks because i never get faced with this shit and now its like i was given the extreme because he was ( Read more... ) -
FUCKING DUH.
SO I Know somebody out there has to know the feeling of what i'm about to express in vulgar language, feels like. like when you know that you're a totally sane and regular person but you come home from your ordinary day and pull your car into the garage and yet you knowingly close the garage door before turning off your car... and then you sit ( Read more... ) -
fuuuuuuuuuuuuucking goddamnit i hate friday nights.
alright so i definately hate the male species right now. tonight was bullshit, i cant believe that I may be single for the rest of my life. it sounds stupid me saying that right now at 20 yrs old but before you know it, i'm 40, then im 50. and i end up dying cold and alone and nobody will discover my body for weeks because i live alone and my dogs ( Read more... ) -
there really is no easy way to say goodbye.
is it so wrong to want a man to come into your life and be able to mold him into someone you can happily tolerate? ive been working on training my man for 8 months now and goood lord has it been a project! finally, for the last few weeks it was incredible!! he stopped getting drunk, drugs werent that big of an issue, and i even got kissed and semi' ( Read more... ) -
tiramisu
the past 21 years in my life, i have learned so much. but i haven't learned a goddamn thing about maintaining a healthy relationship. i put my heart on the line within a daily basis and every night i go to bed alone, dissatisfied with the life that i'm leading. what is life without love? not meaning the unconditional type, or the love that ( Read more... ) -
fuck berbati's pan.
hello livejournal... its been a loooong while. but im back and thats all that really matters. i got in a huge fight tonight with the only man who i do now and have ever really truly loved. it was a terrible fight in the middle of portland and i was drunk and high on pills. i drove home too. i hate myself and will never forgive for doing that. but ( Read more... ) -
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I am a nomad and i dont need a thing. -
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so life has been pretty good lately ( Read more... ) -
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so ZACK didnt turn out to be as cool as I thought. As he thought ( Read more... ) -
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all I can think of to describe last night is the word incredibleFirst I hung out with him and his friends, then we went to some lame party ( Read more... )