"I ATE'NT DEAD"

[bipolar_brit]

I don't like talking about myself but I feel I need to. I hate trying to explain my life because it makes me feel like I've lost control again, but I feel like people may need an explanation

Comments

[toadstoolcouch]

I'm really sorry to hear that, babe. How you're feeling now, or starting to, is like how I've been for the past couple of years, very little relief. Every day is just extra depressed or normal depressed. I know how it is, and I totally feel for you.

You have so many negative influences, like those girls. I dont' know what your status with them is at this point. Every time they are brought up, I'm always yelling at you to block them or do whatever it takes to erase them from your life. I know that your depression isn't just about them, though.

Do whatever you feel you need to. Any charthic, destructive things as long as they help. Your friends will be here, waiting for you when you get back.

[bipolar_brit]

They're all gone now although I'm keeping my messenger programs off so that I can get a bit of peace and quiet for the moment. It just feels like my brain is in neutral at the moment, just idling over, waiting for something. I haven't written anything over the last couple of days but maybe I've needed the break so that I can nap and whatnot. I don't know. And what scares me is the time scale in which it could take for this period to lift - could be days, could be weeks, could be months, could be years. What truly scares me is that it might never happen. But we'll see. I'm used to the ups and downs now and can hold out the hope that one day everything will change again.

[toadstoolcouch]

That's good. Yoy dont' need anyone's shit right now, that's for sure. Have you gotten a chance to see the doctor's yet? You shouldn't have to suffer the low of this unaided. And your work isn't going to say you cna't take a day off to go to the doctor, dude. I have no other advice besides that, suffering a seemingly permanent low myself.

Take care of yourself, k? <333333333333 *melts on your hand*

[bipolar_brit]

Doc's is sorted now, thank fuck. I just have to drop my bipolar meds in so that he write a prescription for those but he's also changed the pill that I'm on. It's a high dose to treat, as well as they can, the polycystic ovaries which cause the hormone imbalance. Anyway, the one that I'm on now heightens the risk of mood swings. So he's taken me off that one and given me another brand with a slightly lower dose. Fingers crossed that some changes will start to come about in the next 6-8 weeks. :)

[julien13]

As usually I'm lost for words... All I can say is I never felt hurt by you. And I can't say I love you - I could say that to no living person without lying - but I like you very much. No matter how much time off you need.

[bipolar_brit]

Thank you. :) I appreciate the comments and hopefully I won't spend too much time hiding. Sooner or later I'll need to come out for something. :D

[2daves]

I need to find the perfect James/Dave pic for you, don't I?
LOL
All kidding aside, I am no stranger to depression in all it's fanciful forms. I'm sending all kinds of positive vibes and prayers your way, babe.
*big squishy hug*

[bipolar_brit]

Pictures would be nice! They always seem to help! :)

And thank you, I appreciate it. :)

*hugs*

[2daves]

its - most days I can spell

[angstmobile]

Lie low for as long as you need... I just hope you're feeling a bit better sooner rather than later.

[bipolar_brit]

I'm feeling a little better today, thank you for asking. :) But how long it will last is anyone's guess. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for being here for me. :)

[angstmobile]

hey, no need to thank me, I'm happy to be here ^-^.