(Untitled)

[blabsicle]

There are three characters, all human, yet slightly monstrous. One was a woman who had no eyes: eye socket holes clearly visible. One was a devilish man with a hunchback. One was a wizard-like man. My view was omniscient, yet completely lacking control

Comments

[alexisdefinedby]

Holy fuck, Babs. I don't even know what to say about that.

I did look up what rape in dreams is supposed to mean, but I don't know if it applies to watching rape or being raped. Did the woman resemble you at all?

Rape - Crime. Profanation. Fear of being forced to unite with something.

[blabsicle]

the woman didn't resemble me in appearance, but I felt everything she felt so deeply that I got the impression that the woman with no eyes was me, and I was not only experiencing everything physically, but I was also outside of my body watching everything helplessly.

I think part of it comes from my anxiety over the salary negotiation I still have to do. I'm afraid I'm going to let myself be taken advantage of because fighting for my worth in a monetary value feels strange to me. Don't get me wrong, I'm going to go in there and kick some ass, but I'm scared of it.

The rest, I'm not sure about. I know I've felt helpless in a lot of ways with major changes. I've been waiting for Katie to live with me for an entire year now. I feel like I'm waiting for something that may never come. Slave to my debt, etc. Afraid of betrayal? Do I feel like I'm being pushed into doing things I don't really want to do?

Ugh. It was hard to write that dream down. But I actually slept much better last night after I did.

[fayphoenecian]

i had three or four totally fucked up dreams last night, too. mine were anxiety dreams rather than full-on nightmares, but draining as all hell.

what is going on?

[blabsicle]

oh so much and not much all at the same time. it's a lot to explain - we'll have to do it in our in person catch-up.