Ok so I saw my best friend get married last night..Of course I cried b/c i felt like i had finally lost my best friend for good. Through out the service I couldn't shake this depressed feeling I had. I feel like that would never be me standing up there. I'm finally dating again but I don't know where it will go. Don't get me wrong-- he's an awesome ( Read more... )

Ok just incase any of my friends are wondering I'm still here.. I just haven't posted for public in awhile. I figured it would be easier to figure out where I'm going and what I'm doing if I just focused my writings to me and me only to read.. Yea it didn't work but hey as far as yall know I'm great! Keeping thinking it and it may come true. ( Read more... )

"Bring Me Down ( Read more... )

Ok so I proved that you don't have to go a thousand miles away to have a great spring break.. so maybe not going to the beach wasn't a bad thing. Of course I worked all week during the day, but at night I got to spend time with some old friends.. It was just like the summer after my 12th grade year.. I didn't get to see shannon like I wanted (who ( Read more... )

Ok so its only 7 at night and I've had 42 emails and a bunch of calls from all my friends wishing me a happy birthday! It really made me feel loved and special.. and I'm thankful for all of yall! Of course there is one person I still haven't heard from that I hope remembers but I'm getting myself ready for him not calling. I guess I didn't get my ( Read more... )

Ok this question use to make me happy when I was little. Now I feel the same way about my birthday as I do christmas.. I really don't want anything material. What I want has more to deal with something I know I won't get- a conversation. Not just any conversation.. oh course it has to be with the right person to count. It would take a miricle for ( Read more... )

Ok SO I've been really busy like always lately. My mom asked me the other day how long I thought I could run like this without sleep and proper food, and I told her.. as long as it takes for me to outrun my emotions or until it either kills me or puts me back in the hospital. Of course, she didn't like that answer but its true. I know I wont stop ( Read more... )

Do you ever feel like all you are ever doing is just trying to catch up with the world? I swear this whole semester that is all I have felt like I was doing. I mean I feel like I'm just treading water so I won't drown...I don't know what to do anymore.. it really sucks.. maybe I should have ran away when Kevin stopped at my house the other night ( Read more... )

Ok so I had to go for my check-up at the Gyno today.. today was alot better than when I went 2 weeks ago after my ER visit. Today wasn't as emotional as that day.. and I didn't come away feeling empty. I probably should have took someone with me that day, but I'm too hardheaded. She said everything looks better today and that I should get back to ( Read more... )

These are my favorite Miranda Lambert songs.. As always when I'm bothered by stuff I run to music.. Right now I'm lost and confused on the inside. But I'm still running from kevin, jt and all my problems.. and acting like I'm ok.. Anyways the dishes and a lit paper are calling ( Read more... )